Feedback needed for this instrumental..Thanks!

[jcapp88]

Hi everyone,
I just finished up an instrumental and wanted to get some feedback from you guys:

New Listing CONTEMPORARY HIP HOP INSTRUMENTALS are needed by a great Film and TV Music Licensing Company that's landed tons of awesome placements for TAXI members. Give them Mid-to-Up-Tempo Instrumentals in the stylistic wheelhouse of artists like Drake, Rick Ross, Kendrick Lamar, etc. Give them stylish, current-sounding beats with contemporary production. Stick with a singular melodic motif that repeats, and add interest to your Track by adding and subtracting layers of instruments. Submissions should be at least 2 minutes in length, and have a buttoned ending and obvious edit points. Broadcast Quality is needed (great sounding home recordings are fine). This company offers a NON-EXCLUSIVE deal. You'll split the sync fee 50/50. You'll retain 100% of the Master rights, and the Library will keep 100% of the Publishing for any placements they generate. You must own 100% of your Master and Copyright in order to submit for this opportunity. Please submit one to three instrumentals online or per CD. All submissions will be screened on a Yes/No basis - No full critiques. Submissions must be received no later than Tuesday, September 2, 2014. TAXI #Y140902HI

Here's the link:
https://soundcloud.com/satellitesurviva ... me/s-nQ9ul


Thanks in advance!


Joe

[ottlukk]

Sounds to me you're giving them pretty much what they're asking for. Nicely done. Ott

[AlpacaRoom]

Sounds great to me. Only thing I might think about doing is dropping a kick drum here and there. The kick pattern is pretty constant and gets sort of wearing. I'd probably drop the kicks on 3 and 10 one time through, then drop 8 the next time, playing around with leaving holes in each bar until you've got a little groove. Probably I'd structure it as a 4-bar pattern, and still drop a few extra at the end of sections to add some interest.

Nice work!


-Nick

[VanderBoegh]

Nice job so far, Joe. Good advice from Nick about playing with that kick pattern. Give it a little variety by changing the pattern (you can change the rhythm totally, or just delete kicks every now and then to add variation). Also, try doing one of the sections without that lead line in there... Or, have a different synth do that lead. Again, variety is what you're shooting for. A music supervisor could easily grab an 8-bar passage and repeat it themselves rather than you doing the same thing for 2 minutes. So give them options, that way you basically have 4 or 5 rather different "usable" sections within each cue. Logically speaking, that will increase your chances of success by 5 times (not sure if that math is accurate or not, but hopefully you get the idea).

~~Matt