How to Imply Something through Lyrics??

[hummingbird]

I tmight be an idea to write in prose what you are trying to say and work from that.

If there is music playing, the sky can't be silent.. so maybe.......?

sultry evening sky
bossa guitar rhythm
piano keys tappin

[mikemichnya]

Hey Rebecca,

"Show don't tell" may not be easy, but when it's done well it's downright beautiful, especially when there's great prosody to go with it. Casey's post inspired me to share one of my all-time favorites by Mary Gauthier. (It's so good, I couldn't just share one verse )If you've never heard it, it's well worth a listen. Put's you right there:

I Drink

He'd get home at 5:30
Fix his drink, sit down in his chair
Pick a fight with mama
Complain about us kids getting in his hair

At night he'd sit 'lone and smoke
I'd see his frown behind his lighter's flame
Now that same frown's in my mirror
I got my daddy's blood inside my veins

Fish swim, birds fly
Daddies yell, mamas cry
Old men sit and think
I drink

Chicken TV dinner
6 minutes on defrost, 3 on high
Beer to wash it down with then another
A little whiskey on the side

It's not so bad alone here
It don't bother me that every night's the same
I don't need another lover
Hanging 'round, trying to make me change

Fish swim, birds fly
Lovers leave by and by
Old men sit and think
I drink

I know what I am
But I don't give a damn

Fish swim, birds fly
Daddies yell, mamas cry
Old men sit and think
I drink

Songwriters
CRIT HARMON, MARY GAUTHIER

Great tips in this spread (especially the Pat Pattison course), and I can add "Writing Down the Bones" by Natalie Goldberg if you're looking for more inspriation. You're definitely on the right track with that verse. Keep at it!

[Strangesound]

I'm still an amateur having a hard time writing "show-lyrics", too and English not being my native language. But I noticed many similarities between good lyrics.

For example: Something is stated and you stay with the idea in the next line to illuminate it a bit more with a comment, remark or general observation. It's the old action -> re-action thing. Then it feels complete. You generate pairs of lyric "bricks" and build everything upon them. I used to put a new thought in every new line and wondered why it felt so shallow.

Another thing: If the words aren't right and the story does not make any sense I realized that one can become "pushy", leaving the nonsense line alone and hope to make up for it in the next line. This does not work at all and if you spot lines that are feeling empty, just delete them.

I think that James Bay does a great lyrics job if you're into contemporary artists. His lyrics could open new doors in your approach writing lyrics. He does it in a very non-pushy manner. He shows you how it is, it's sometimes almost pure observation, kinda Zen-like in verses. The listener decides herself/himself how beautiful, unfair or bad in the story is. In the chorus things have oftentimes a "call-to-action" approach. Things get moving. But in the end it is a mix of all these things

Hope it helps a bit!

http://www.azlyrics.com/j/jamesbay.html

http://nicholastozier.com/how-to-write- ... ve-lyrics/

[becw75]

Thanks Adrian,

Excellent links and tips.

Now that I'm starting to attempt lyric writing, I'm opting for clarity over rhyme.

And when they used to say… 're-write', I thought - re-write what?
Now I think…. - oh… I get what they're saying now about the re-write thing. .

Regards
Rebecca

[Strangesound]

Thanks Adrian,

Excellent links and tips.

Now that I'm starting to attempt lyric writing, I'm opting for clarity over rhyme.

And when they used to say… 're-write', I thought - re-write what?
Now I think…. - oh… I get what they're saying now about the re-write thing. .

Regards
Rebecca

You're very welcome. Yes, re-writing is the secret sauce every one should use on the songwriting Schnitzel

I'm cooking right now and thought of your lyrics and had to share this thought

Sultry is the air, and
silent evening sky
Pulse of bossa guitar
Tap of piano string
It's tune a melodic delight.


How about concentrating on silence first:
Sultry air
4am silence
resting/rusting guitar strings
virgin piano keys

It's spontaneous and it's not perfect (too much of resembling a bland list(?)). Maybe a more experienced lyric writer could help me out here But it gets me in a certain mood and then you could brake the silence in the chorus, you play on the instruments because you found the courage to express a special feeling towards someone.

[becw75]

Heh heh heh. Love the schnitzel!

Do you know bossa move music?
The description is specific for bossa nova.
The words describe it's musical elements & timbre.

The bossa rhythm - is a specific rhythm… like a pulse. It's doesn't rest.
The piano keys - sounds like 'glass'. Yummy.

Do you know the history of bossa nova? How it developed?
Even though it's a list it's highly specific to the genre.

No chorus! (Oops!)

I will write a song about a schnitzel though

[Strangesound]

Heh heh heh. Love the schnitzel!

Do you know bossa move music?
The description is specific for bossa nova.
The words describe it's musical elements & timbre.

The bossa rhythm - is a specific rhythm… like a pulse. It's doesn't rest.
The piano keys - sounds like 'glass'. Yummy.

Do you know the history of bossa nova? How it developed?
Even though it's a list it's highly specific to the genre.

No chorus! (Oops!)

I will write a song about a schnitzel though

Yeeeees, Schnitzel is always good

Yes, I know the sound of bossa nova but not so much about the history. I think I missed your bossa nova reference somewhere along this thread.

Anyways, good luck with the tune!