Hicktown TMZ ©2016 Robert George BMI
Saw a photo on TMZ yesterday
A starlet steppin’ out on her fiancé
Some guy perched up on a fence
Had a telephoto lense
And snapped a shot from half a mile away
‘round here we got no paparazzi or tabloids
Even so it gits real tricky to avoid
The hicktown TMZ
Cos there’s nothin’ they don’t see
Bill and Johnny in the boondox
Crankin’ up their boom box
Stoned and higher than a coupla moonrocks
Now there’s pic’hers on the preacher’s Facebook page
People say Joanie got preggers
At one o’ them rowdy ourdoor keggers
There’s been phonecalls, tweets and e-mails
Nosy biddys got the details
Cos rumors are all the rage
Of the hicktown TMZ
Parked down by the river in a quiet place
Me n Jill were there to watch the turtle race
And the next day… I’ll be damned
Someone’s got an instagram
Of me roundin’ second base
We thought we were out there all alone
Never saw that shadow with the android phone
It's the hicktown TMZ
And there’s nothin’ they don’t see
Bill and Johnny in the boondox
Crankin’ up their boom box
Stoned and higher than a coupla moonrocks
Now there’s pic’hers on the preacher’s Facebook page
People say Joanie got preggers
At one o’ them rowdy ourdoor keggers
There’s been phonecalls, tweets and e-mails
Nosy biddys got the details
Cos rumors are all the rage
Of the hicktown TMZ
Yeah, those whisper mongers
Just keep gittin’ stronger
Day by day and week by week
Down there at the local bar
All the bathroom walls are
Like a drunken Wikileaks
It’s the hicktown TMZ
And there’s nothin’ they don’t see
Bill and Johnny in the boondox
Crankin’ up their boom box
Stoned and higher than a coupla moonrocks
Now there’s pic’hers on the preacher’s Facebook page
People say Joanie got preggers
At one o’ them rowdy ourdoor keggers
There’s been phonecalls, tweets and e-mails
Nosy biddys got the details
Cos rumors are all the rage
Of the hicktown TMZ
Hicktown TMZ
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