Sting Desert Rose/Celine Dion listing

[burpo]

HI there, folks.

Here's a song (old recording) that I'd like to re-write for the following listing.

ADULT CONTEMPORARY BALLADS with Female Vocals are needed by a Major Record Label for a Grammy Award Winning Recording Artist that's working on a brand new record. Male vocals are fine for this pitch, as long as they can lyrically work from a Female perspective. Please submit radio-worthy, Mid-Tempo Ballads that could be heard on the same playlist as artists like (but not limited to) Celine Dion, Sting, Katherine McPhee, etc., etc., etc. Take a listen to the references they gave us to get an idea of the sound and style that could work for this pitch:

"Loved Me Back To Life" by Celine Dion:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4f5KuRXtjeE

"Desert Rose" by Sting:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3lWwBslWqg

"Unbroken" by Katherine McPhee:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYD6xm7qrsc

Please submit well-structured, passionate, commercially appealing Ballads that have inviting melodies, and a super strong chorus with a big emotional payoff. You'd be wise to have a top-notch vocal performance on your demo to help get them excited about cutting it. Stripped-down demos are okay for this pitch, if your song is really, really impressive! Your recording quality (even for stripped-down demos) needs to be clean, clear, well balanced, and good enough to represent your song well. Please submit one to three Ballads online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened on a Yes/No basis by a TAXI screener handpicked by the Label - No full critiques. Submissions must be received no later than 11:59PM (PST), on Sunday, May 29th, 2016. TAXI #Y160529AC

I'd love to hear any comments regarding lyrics, melody, vibe, etc ... before recording a new, more contemporary, demo.

Lyrics on page.

Thanks in advance!

-b

https://soundcloud.com/burpo/youve-got- ... pe-116-bpm

[johnlewitt]

Burpo,

I've learned to read these listings and realize that everything they put in there is for a reason. No offence, but the vocal on your demo doesn't meet this criteria:

You'd be wise to have a top-notch vocal performance on your demo to help get them excited about cutting it

Just play your track against Sting's for comparison.

John

[burpo]

I agree. It's important to read listings and postings carefully.

[burpo]

Revised lyric:

You've Got My Love-

Grey is the way, the day is going down

You’re falling like a gown

Try as you might, no matter how you fight
You cannot find the light

When all the huff and puffin’
Amounts to next to nothin’


Know, You’ve got my love, No matter what
You know you’ve got my love
Know, I give a damn, You’re in my thoughts
You’ve got my love , You’ve got my love



That sound, all around, It’s booming in your ears

It’s all that you can hear


Pat answers that come from your dearest friends

Show they don't understand



I offer no advice
I just hope it will suffice to



Know, You’ve got my love...



The more I know you, the more I want to
When no one gets you, I’ve got to let you know that


You’ve got my love
 4X

Know, You’ve got my love...

[lesmac]

Hi B,

My feeling is this one's off target for this listing.

Your track has an 80's New Wave feel that I don't think a modern Diva would take to.

Just a couple of cents

Les

[burpo]

Okay, guys. Gotcha loud and clear.

Was hoping more for feedback on how to improve the lyrics and melody,
but if it's a clunker, it's a clunker.

Thanks for the ears!! I appreciate it.

-b

[lesmac]

but if it's a clunker, it's a clunker.

..for this listing

[SteveC]

Hi Burpo,

great songs are never written....they are re written....It really doesn't fit the listing. Maybe a female vocal would help but its a square peg trying to be put in a round hole. It's not a clunker, it just doesn't fit this listing.

Always enjoy your lyrics.

st

[burpo]

Hey Steve,

Thanks for the kind and encouraging words.

Gonna work on the song and save it for a more appropriate listing. : )

-b