The In-Law Josey Wales

It was our first date and her daddy asked me in
Handshake like a vice, and his cold dark eyes squeezed into an evil squint
And though later she wanted to go someplace alone
In my mind her daddy’s stare was still our chaperone
Even out in Waikiki on our wedding night
I was almost too nervous to dim the lights

Cos he’s tall and mean with a long black coat
He’ll scare you straight with the scriptures he quotes
Sawed-off double barrel on an iron rack
Buck-shot in the crooked banker’s Cadillac
Mistreatin’ his fam’ly gets him real upset
Served in the Corps., shot five time in the war
And he ain’t dead yet
He’s hard as oak and tough as nails
He’s the in-law Josey Wales

Me n her were still newlyweds when a levee broke
Though we got out fast, all my mounted bass swam home when our house got soaked
When that thievin’ insurance guy refused to pay
Me n my father-in-law paid a visit one day
He growled somethin’ to that pencil pushin’ pencil neck
So they cut me a break and cut me a check

Cos he’s tall and mean with a long black coat
He’ll scare you straight with the scriptures he quotes
Sawed-off double barrel on an iron rack
Buck-shot in the crooked banker’s Cadillac
Mistreatin’ his fam’ly gets him real upset
Served in the Corps., shot five time in the war
And he ain’t dead yet
He’s hard as oak and tough as nails
He’s the in-law Josey Wales

Cos he’s tall and mean with a long black coat
He’ll scare you straight with the scriptures he quotes
Sawed-off double barrel on an iron rack
Buck-shot in the crooked banker’s Cadillac
Mistreatin’ his fam’ly gets him real upset
Served in the Corps., shot five time in the war
And he ain’t dead yet
He’s hard as oak and tough as nails
He’s the in-law Josey Wales

©2010 Robert George