Yes, that's true. Kelil had jumped into the conversation and he had recently done a bit of that. I was referencing many rants I've seen over a long period of time on the forum.

Ok. I'll begin with the song " Day One ". Lyrics are as follows :

Sunset does not mean the end of us
We can make this last all night
Till the dawn and then some
I will help you see the light

As the tides, they rise and fall, we are bound by
Our love can fill all the rooms, hall to hall
I realize late in the game
I don't even know your name

(Chorus)
This is just Day One, I yearn for you today
I'd love all our days, to be just like, to be just like, Day One

Months have gone and passed us by, how the time flies
As much as things have changed
They remain as they were
We are bound by forces seen

Even though we both have changed, for the better
We leave our feeling's just the same, and unrestrained
Though we might have jumped the gun
We'll always have Day One

(Repeat Chorus)
(Bridge)
The candelabra shines in your eyes, and right through mine
The shadow of your silluette, deja vu of the night we met

(Repeat Chorus)
Music is at:
http://www.taxi.com/davebradley

Dave
Musically, this is a very beautiful adult contemporary style ballad. As to whether the MUSIC would have been OK for this listing, it probably depends on where the line was between rock style with a leaning toward A/C vs. actually being in the A/C genre. “Contemporary scene setting” was mentioned in the listing with respect to certain types of TV shows. It could be that stylistically, it just wasn’t a match.

Regardless of the music, the lyrics are… sorry to give such tough love… a total mess. The hook line “I'd love all our days, to be just like, to be just like, Day One” is beautiful. However, everything else around it is fairly unintelligible as far as the listener understanding the song. I don’t have time to go into detail or debate that. If you don’t believe me or Taxi screeners, pick any professional critique service (Braheny, Blume, Pattison, etc) and get a critique.

The listing was clear:
Even if that wasn’t said in the listing, I really think it would be tough to ever get a forward for a song with these lyrics. The bottom line is you either need to hit the books hard on lyric writing or collaborate with a lyricist.

My advice is to stop railing at Taxi, take stock of your own songwriting strengths and weaknesses and move forward from there.

Best wishes for 2012,
Casey

Generally speaking, Casey and I come from different neighborhoods, lyric-wise,
but I agree with him completely on this one.

Philosophical abstractions are like movie voice-over. They have to
occur during the concrete, the "story." The trick now is to take your
jewels and give them a setting.

Just my opinion, of course.

Happy New Year!

b

(I think Adam Duritz from Counting Crows does a good job of
blending the poetically ethereal and the narratively concrete.)

If it's any consolation I had three returns from this listing and couldn't figure out for the life of me why they weren't ALL forwards! The second the listing came up, I saw it and thought "awesome, that'll be a sure thing" as I think the OP probably did too. The boxes ticked on mine were 'Vocal Performance' and 'Music', which added to my confusion as the vox had received 8s and 9s on "S" listings and I didn't know what to make of the 'Music' box being ticked at all. They were all rock songs weren't they?

I think I saw it as a "dream" listing as it was so broad and I knew I had material that would fit it (in the broad sense). What I SHOULD have done was tried to REFINE what the listing was asking for, and to do a bit more research. I just took it for granted that I was going to get through. I didn't even listen to any of the reference material, which just feels completely stupid as if I had, I doubt I would've submitted any of these tracks. When I think about the use of 'With or without you' by U2 in Friends, I can completely see how my tracks are not in that same frame, regardless of the rock categories they fall into.

I don't know why the supervisor ticked the vocal performance box, best guess is that the vocals weren't clear enough for that purpose, or that they just flat out didn't like my voice. As for the music box, I guess it's just a case of not close enough.

I was angry at the time but now I'm more cross with myself for not reading and researching the listing more. If I had done, who knows? I might've sent a different track from my catalogue and got a forward! The tracks I sent were 'No Light', 'Beautiful' and 'Sun Is Shining' on my taxi page if anyone wants to learn from my mistakes.

Just my two cents, better luck next time.

No matter how well a listing party describes what they are looking for, when they are screening on their own, there will be some element of just plain "Does it work for what I need?". One song I had returned was a "Casey thought it was perfect for this listing" submission. Obviously, this listng party didn't agree. Such is life.

We should all be very grateful that Taxi provides these direct to listing party opportunities. What more could we want? We get to be heard directly by library owners, music supervisors, publishers, indie label reps, etc.

Best,
Casey

I was under the impression that direct story telling was country music; rock music is more philosophical, a more impressionistic type of lyric. For this listing perhaps not a fit. The song " Don't Go Away " is a song that I took your advice to heart and rewrote it. The lyrics are now cohesive and flow. They didn't like that one either.
What genre would you place U2? Are they pop/ rock, or are they A/C?
Query? Do lyrics have to say : The literal, only, with no descriptive adjectives. Is it alright to use symbolism at all?
Instead of ' the rain is wet ', can I say ' wetness fills the air '?
I really don't think the average person even cares. Also, as the dispatch listing that just was run for a Canadian T.V. opportunity states, ( Normally), that libraries don't want specifics as they tend to want the scene to make the story, not the song in the background.
Obviously that was not the case in this listing. Yes, I know the 'person' that ran the listing reviewed the material sent.
No -one is going to hear the whole song,how would anyone need to follow the story in the lyrics. Mood setters, not story tellers. I thought this odd.
Anyway, you have been very helpful with my overall view of the music world. Your infectious positive attitude has made me work harder, as most of my critiques from Taxi screeners do. D.B.

... the only race we're in, is the human race... D.B.
www.taxi.com/davebradley
www.reverbnation.com/THEdavebradley

Dave
You posted your latest lyrics to "Don't Go Away" on your other rant thread on Dec. 23. I commented on them then. So you couldn't have submitted a later version than that for the 12/7 relationship listing. The lyrics have the same issues I've noticed in most of your songs. They are confusing, all over the board, conflicting in tense and time, etc.

When I said A/C, I should have clarified that I meant A/C but much more retro A/C-- more like a ballad from a few decades ago.

Lyrics do not have to be literal all the time, can use images to hint at things, etc. But when they are truly in the "I have no idea what this is about" category, have too many conflicts in settings & tense/time, say things that contradict other things, and so on they aren't going to cut it.

Never compare to some song that was on the radio that might have lyrical gaffes. As an unknown, you are held to a much higher standard.

Again, my advice is to stop questioning the rest of the world and learn to write better lyrics (or collaborate).

Good luck,
Casey

BTW, Taxi is running this listing again as an "S" listing:

RELATIONSHIP SONGS IN ALL ROCK STYLES needed by a Los Angeles-based Indie Label for Film & TV placements, with Advertising Potential. From the source: “I need Contemporary scene-setting music with relationships as the primary theme. Lyrical themes can include: Love, Romance, Jealousy, Quarreling, Values, etc. Think of Popular shows such as “Sex in the City,” “Friends,” or any general relationship-based Comedy or Love story.” Listing is open to Soft Rock, Alt. Rock, Modern Rock, Pop Rock, and Indie Rock. Male or female vocals OK. Vocals must be expressive & communicate with viewers. Lyrics must provide a fresh, universal approach to themes and have a strong, focused hook. Your song will be used to add emotion, energy, or atmosphere to a scene so make sure you communicate a clear feeling in your performance and songs. NO instrumentals please. Vocal and instrumental presentation must be top -notch. Broadcast Quality needed (great sounding home recordings are also OK). We recently ran this listing as Dispatch listing #D111207RS, and the company would like to hear more material. If you submitted to this Dispatch listing, please send in new songs this time around. Please submit one to three songs online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened and critiqued by a screener handpicked by the Record Company, and must be received no later than Tuesday, January 24, 2012. TAXI #S120124RK

If you had songs returned for the Dispatch listing, you might want to contact Taxi and ask if it's OK to submit again so you can get a critique. Definitely contact Taxi first and ask if this is OK, since they do say in the listing, “If you submitted to this Dispatch listing, please send in new songs this time around”…

Casey

The 'mess' that you refer to : "Don't Go Away", has been picked up by a Nashville Publishing and Placement company that DOES NOT ACCEPT DIRECT SUBMISSIONS. They had heard it through another one of their staff, who then contacted me to ask if they could represent it. Also picked up : "The Love That I Know", which was passed on by a few Taxi listings. They are excited about a new one from me called "Let's Embrace Our Difference". Contacted me this morning. That would probably, by Taxi standards, be something wrong with these as well. I can only hope that these messes keep coming. It only takes one person in a position to do something to make this all go.
As Taxi themselves have stated, " It's only one person's opinion, albeit an informed one." Not always, I have seen. Not to say ANYONE is wrong, just that one persons' opinion can be less than correct. Can't tell you how many 'executives' in the industry were wrong about the Beatles. You all remember them? D.B.
P.S. - going back to my studio - to make a complete mess!!
... the only race we're in, is the human race... D.B.

www.taxi.com/davebradley
www.reverbnation.com/THEdavebradley