Are Love Ballads Dead???

[heinsite]

hi folks, i'll stick my neck out again and ask this question:is there anyplace for melodic, simple love tunes? ah, that's the set up, here's the tune for anyone who wishes to critique. all me, sorry if it doesn't yet meet taxi standards, but i have MANY of these "style" of tunes, they have been called when submitted "classic", but not current enough, etc. they say the lyrics don't tell a story, but i'm so friggin' stubborn that not all songs tell beginning to end stories. so i'm looking for the truth, nothing but the truth from who ever out there who wishes to comment. again, i gots many of these, most of which you aint heard yet.thanks for anything you can lend.http://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_ ... eam=1Close Your EyesVerse 1When I say that I can't sleepYou hold me close and everything's all rightYou know I seldom dreamBut when I do it's always in black and whiteOur crazy days are longYou're always there to listen through my nightChorusAnd you say close your eyesHear the music of the warm wind through the treesClose your eyesLet my hands caress you, our bedroom world's at peaceClose your eyesHear the cricket's lullabyClose your eyesVerse 2I thought I was so strongBut you say shhhh, you're my man of steelI look into your eyes so blueRight now you're the only thing that's realWill we ever get away, forget this raceAnd remember how to feel

[lopc]

For some reason, I can access all songs except these posts on TAXI. Sorry. I would truly love to hear the music to this special lyric. Yeah, I speak against ballads, love or otherwise, but this is a very good lyric, for what it is worth. I can't find anything out of line. The thing just flows beautifully and it is a fairly strong observation for a guy to explain how to gain strength from his woman. Pretty bold stuff. Brava

[jamesrjones]

I'm a big fan of the love ballad. I think you still hear this genre of music today, but style has changed significantly. Younger audiences are more jaded, I think. They seem to shy away from anything where the language is too "mushy" Personally, I love that kind of stuff. I'm a child of the 70's music scene and I still like some of those Barry Manilow songs. This tune sounds very 60's to me. I think you should listen to James Blunt or Daniel Powter and differences will pop right out. IMO. With modern ballads, lyrics need to tell a story and there is a lot more dynamics in the vocals and between verses and chorus sections. There is also more reliance on a beat of some kind.Good luckJim

[steini]

this has kinda brit-pop feel to it, maybe would be better if you sang it with a big ass uk accent I feel the guitar is too prominent, I would try to soften it somewhat, then the instruments seem panned strangely, not togeather. The vocals are pretty good, some pitch problems in the beginning.The ending is kinda strange, close your EYYYYYEEEESSSS, it's like you are about to kill the poor thing.Nice song, I liked the listen

[heinsite]

thank you all for your comments, duly noted! steini, never thought about the killing the poor thing!! obviously not my intentiion, but i'm still laughing! also since i'm still trying to mix this crap myself, thank you for the mixing comments. well done all. and lopc, thanks for the lyric notes, my lyrics are so damned slammed (this is FAR from my best or clevor, but so very simple) by taxi, it's good to hear anything positive!cheers to all,warren

[lc]

Yeah, no one writes about love anymore. They seem to get it confused with something else I agree that the guitar comes across as a bit too harsh. It wasn't easy to hear the bass and I think a nice warm mellow bass would sound nice on this kind of tune.I'm with Jim, in that this has a 60's vibe to it and adding a simple beat (maybe a kick, rimshot, some light hat and cymbal work) would be a nice addition.I'm no seasoned mixer or master...master-er, but yeah, work on the levels. My speakers were distorting near the middle. I enjoyed it. Keep at it!Laughing @ Steini's comment about the ending

[heinsite]

thanks lc, putting this tune back on my " fix up the damned thing" burner.heinsite

[timbehrens]

Cool song. I like the harmonies toward the end. I agree that a beat might help move it along a little bit... maybe a kick, a simple sidestick, and hi-hat. I was just talking with another songwriter last night about how it does seem that songs are moving more and more away from the abstract (things dealing with internal emotions or vague conversations) and more into the realm of story-telling... specific situations, visual elements that paint the picture of those situations, appeal to more than one sense, etc. This is a hard thing for me as I've always been more of an abstract writer.I think the trick, too, is that when you do use descriptors that invoke an image, they need to be consistent in the image they are painting. For example, your verse about the warm wind through the trees and the crickets lullably definitely set a scene for me, but in the same verse you are talking about the bedroom world at peace. For a moment, my mind said 'are there trees and crickets in the bedroom', then I thought 'oh, he probably means outside'... maybe there needs to be a window in that verse to let the outside in and fill in the gap for our mind's eye.Hope some of that makes sense. I'd love to see how this song evolves, as it's very similar to what my songwriter friend is working on and I think that has been our big question... how to bring ballads into the modern world and make them relevant again.Best of luck to you and I really enjoyed listening to your tune.

[heinsite]

tim--thank you very much for the listen. unfortunately, i just finished a remix, which turns out to be just a bit clearer, more bass, and after "drums" and percussion, i dumped them, as they were not good enough. i'd post the same tune, but you'd not hear any significant change.yes, i understand the "story" concept, hell, i've been killed to death (ha, another country western title waiting to be written--go ahead, you can have it...) but your comments are very understood. your comment about the window is a GREAT ONE. unfortunately again, i feel (hell, maybe FELT now...) that it was pretty understood. but hell, i come from an old school that leaves stuff to the listener--jesus, i still do not understand TOO MANY of the lyrics in some of the over and over and over and over (sorry...over...) again tunes i hear on pop/a/c radio. maybe i'm to old, too dumb, but don't think those lyrics are any better.i guess we either embark on joining them, or trying to buck the trend. hell, now the whole focus seems to be turning back to the 80's. hmmm. i'm going to have to have faith in what i'm doing, or die trying... as far as the evolutiion of the song, i'm canning it for now, after working on it today, no change in lyric, no change in much, i'll try to post it here once i get the "new" rendition onto my page so i can transport to this forum, but it aint that much different, and if the lyric is listened to, it seems that the situation, the "scene" if you will is pretty clear. hell, maybe not clear enough. here's the tune again...http://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_ ... eam=1thank you again for listening, warren

[timbehrens]

Hi Warren,I like the new version. Thanks for sharing the link. Yeah, it feels like the art of lyric writing is always going to be a bit of a mystery to me. I'm still working up the courage to post a few things here... I am very much an abstract writer and a lot of what I write about is internal... I've attended a few music workshops in recent past and they keep telling me to paint more of a visual picture, to take my lyrics out of the internal realm and into more of a situational one, something that appeals to the senses. I think your verses were definitely understood. It was almost the voices of those reviewers speaking through me offering the window suggestion... lol. I was just talking with a friend the other night about abstract/emotional writing versus storytelling and we came to the conclusion that a lot of depends on what your end goal is. If you're writing a country song, it seems like they are looking for specific storytelling kinds of songs.... but one of my favorite bands has been Pink Floyd, and I think a lot of their stuff exists entirely in the realm of the abstract. Anyways, it's a pleasure to hear your new version of the song. Best of luck with everything and hope to see you around the boards.