Asking for advice based on lazy return review

[ScottFree4All]

My return review really left me wondering if I am on the same planet as Listener ID # 356. Obviously I think Listener ID # 356 was not only less than helpful, perhaps lazy, and flat out wrong. The listing was for:

LA-Based Music Licensing Company with tons of FILM/TV and COMMERCIAL placements needs SINGER/SONGWRITER SONGS in the style of "New Shoes" by Paolo Nutini, "Gone in the Morning" by Newton Faulkner, "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles, etc. They're looking for FUN songs that have AWESOME and INFECTIOUS melodies that leave the listener humming long after the song is over. They need CONTEMPORARY songs with UNIQUE hooks that have commercial appeal. UNIVERSAL LYRICS are important to avoid featuring specific names, brands, dates/times, locations, detailed storylines that can conflict with a scene, etc. MALE and/or FEMALE vocals are BOTH OK. Broadcast quality is needed (excellent home recordings are fine.) You must own or control 100% of your composition and master recording. Please submit one to three songs online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened and critiqued by TAXI and must be received no later than Wednesday, January 2, 2013. TAXI #S130102SS

The song was returned - did I mention that? I scored 8 of 10 on Melody, Lyrics, Song Structure, Production, Engineering, Musicianship, and Lead Vocal. Marketability was given a 7.

The first comment was:

This song has a solid artist presence but could have a stronger infectiously catchy chorus similar to songs by the artist mentioned in the listing. The vibes of "New Shoes" by Paolo Nutini, "Gone in the Morning" by Newton Faulkner, and "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles is the contemporary, singer songwriter vibe this listing is going for

The Style was checked as "On target for this listing"
and the comment was, "Close to the target style of the listing."

The Overall Comments were:

Hello Scott

This is a very focused writing and could be a solid song for this listing if the chorus had stronger hooks like "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles. This listing is looking for songs that leaves the audience whistling and humming away long after they've heard it so that bar is set super high.
Check out "Love Song" for further inspiration on how catchy the song has to be for this specific listing.

LOVE SONG CHORUS LYRICS

I'm not gonna write you a love song
'Cause you ask for it
'Cause you need one, you see

I'm not gonna write you a love song
'Cause you tell me it's make or breaking this
If you're on your way

I'm not gonna write you to stay
All you have is leaving
I'm gon' need a better reason
To write you a love song today, today

The Sound Quality - Well-recorded with the comment being, "Great stuff"

The main reason(s) you were or were not forwarded for this listing is:
"Could have stronger hooks"

Listener ID # 356 - was not very helpful at all. The review was lazy and nothing more than lip service to me. I am frequently wrong -LOL - but I would really like some assistance here because this is a very strong song and if this song is close - I am not sure what to do to make it "marketable."

Can anyone here suggest to me how I could make the hooks stronger on this song? Or are the hooks just fine and Listener ID # 356 just had a bad day. I honestly welcome any and all opinions. If I'm too close to this and not seeing it - well, here's where maybe some of you can help.

My song is "Get Ridiculous" and it's on my Taxi page at:
http://www.taxi.com/scottfree4all

Thank you in advance for any advice.

[AmandaAnderson]

Hi Scott

I suspect (and it's said in your review I think) that the bar is very high for this listing - and that it's considered that the chorus needs to be a bit stronger and memorable (re the referenced song).
I am assuming that there will have been some songs submitted that met the criteria for the strong and memorable chorus (people going away singing it !).

Don't feel down We had 3 returns for this listing. It is our very first submission response since joining, and it's great to get the feedback in order to point us to where we need to develop.
It does say clearly on the feedback review form - that its only in reference to THAT listing, that the comments and scores are relevant. And that the reason that a song is or isn't forwarded, isn't to do with the 'scores' in the boxes, but more dependent on the reviewers gut instinct as to whether it's spot on for the listing. The scores are there to help us know where to develop (in relation to that, and I assume similar, listings).

Our scores were similar to yours almost (mostly 7s, some 8s and with a couple of 6's thrown in over 3 songs) over our 3 submitted songs. And the comments similar too, with a couple of differences.
* Needs stronger hooks/more memorable chorus
* Not quite matching the referenced style/genre
* Production could be improved (but was OK for this listing)
(We knew that the production was not good on these 3 tracks, but wanted feedback on matching the a la's and songwriting, so submitted them).

Some parts of your review are almost identical to ours, but then that's to be expected as some things can have 'ready made' comments to paste in where required. I myself used to review other people's writing (not songwriting), and used to have some' stock phrases' ready to paste in where relevant, in order to save time typing the same thing over and over. I personally don't have a problem with that.

I think your review, despite it being a return, is very positive, and it sounds like you'd do well and be forwarded in some other listings, where maybe the 'hook' wasn't so vitally important.

Not sure if I have helped or not

Good luck and good song Loved some of your other ones too (I had a good listen while I was there )

Amanda & Tony

[Casey H]

Hi Scott
I like the song a lot... Very well done. My only nit pik is it may take a while to get to the hook and getting there sooner might help.

I get that you disagree with the return. But I have a problem with you calling the screener lazy. The screener's opinion was that for *THIS* listing, the hook wasn't strong enough. That was spelled out in the review. Not helpful? Not sure what you expect.

From what I can see, the screener did their job well. You just don't agree with the result.

Best,
Casey

[ScottFree4All]

Thanks Casey - you're advice makes sense. My song "Get Ridiculous" opens with a teaser of the hook - so I didn't feel like the wait was too long but once again - a valid point.

My pet peeve with this listener is that the listing is already there - I don't need them to copy/paste bits of listing text to fill in space - unless they're making a specific point. When the listener pasted in the lyrics to the chorus of "Love Song" I was not clear what the listener was saying. My song is lyrically busy in the verse which sets up the WTF carefree chorus with sparse lyrics and a strong singable hook - so it differs a bit stylistically in that my hook sums up the verses. I can easily re-write "Love Song" or any song - but I was going for something that sounded like it could be played on the same radio station set - not a clone.

I'm past the point where these reviews mean much when it comes to encouragement. Kind words are always appreciated, but I stand by my statement that I felt the listener was lazy. Or maybe they just didn't take the time to articulate any worthwhile advice that seemed genuine. If we are to write Pop songs that "don't bore us and get to the chorus" and we are critiqued on any failings however large or small, is it too much to ask for the same from a return review? BTW - I am fully aware that I'm blowing off a large dose of steam but it still just doesn't sit right with me. This was a wasted opportunity - especially if I don't learn nuthin.

[Casey H]

Thanks Casey - you're advice makes sense. My song "Get Ridiculous" opens with a teaser of the hook - so I didn't feel like the wait was too long but once again - a valid point.

My pet peeve with this listener is that the listing is already there - I don't need them to copy/paste bits of listing text to fill in space - unless they're making a specific point. When the listener pasted in the lyrics to the chorus of "Love Song" I was not clear what the listener was saying. My song is lyrically busy in the verse which sets up the WTF carefree chorus with sparse lyrics and a strong singable hook - so it differs a bit stylistically in that my hook sums up the verses. I can easily re-write "Love Song" or any song - but I was going for something that sounded like it could be played on the same radio station set - not a clone.

I'm past the point where these reviews mean much when it comes to encouragement. Kind words are always appreciated, but I stand by my statement that I felt the listener was lazy. Or maybe they just didn't take the time to articulate any worthwhile advice that seemed genuine. If we are to write Pop songs that "don't bore us and get to the chorus" and we are critiqued on any failings however large or small, is it too much to ask for the same from a return review? BTW - I am fully aware that I'm blowing off a large dose of steam but it still just doesn't sit right with me. This was a wasted opportunity - especially if I don't learn nuthin.

Scott
You should drop an email to headscreener _AT_ taxi dot com regarding your concern about the review. I agree with you that pasting the lyrics to one of the sample songs doesn't mean much, especially if the issue is more the MUSICAL hook. Taxi does like (respectful) feedback to keep training and re-training screeners as well as address member concerns.

Best of luck,
Casey

[AmandaAnderson]

Casey - we submitted 3 songs and our review had the same comments (with couple of exceptions - we had more wrong, first listing etc and all that lol), and exactly the same paste of lyrics, for exactly the same reason - needed a stronger hook - no more comment other than to refer to the lyrics and to listen to that song.
I assumed that was normal for a review, this being our very first.

Amanda

[ScottFree4All]

Casey,

Another good suggestion from you - I was not aware of that line of communication. Many times the term "hook" is so non-specific - it would be helpful to embellish the thought when it comes up in a critique. The best reviews that I have received have made that extra effort - whether or not I agreed - I was pleased that I wasn't just being hurried along.

Thank you again Casey - you are always looking out for others and I appreciate and respect the time you put in to help. I will write Taxi on this subject.

Cheers,
Scott

[ScottFree4All]

Amanda & Tony,

Thank you also for your kind words. I will write to Taxi and cite this thread. If I get a response I will PM you, since we have a similar uneasiness with the listener for this listing.

Cheers,
Scott

[Casey H]

Casey - we submitted 3 songs and our review had the same comments (with couple of exceptions - we had more wrong, first listing etc and all that lol), and exactly the same paste of lyrics, for exactly the same reason - needed a stronger hook - no more comment other than to refer to the lyrics and to listen to that song.
I assumed that was normal for a review, this being our very first.

Amanda

Hi Amanda!
Now THAT'S a problem. *My* understanding is Taxi screeners are not allowed to copy and paste in this manner (same paste to multiple reviews) and are clearly told not to. Taxi would want to know about this so they could review the situation with the screener. You may also want to drop an email to headscreener _AT_ taxi dot com or call the 800 number and speak to someone. They really DO want your feedback, especially when presented reasonably and respectfully.

Casey

[Len911]

Calling the screener lazy seems a little to me like the pot calling the kettle black. I don't mean to be ridiculous,lol, sorry, but I was really let down by all the o's in the chorus, seemed lazy, because the rest of the song is just spectacular! The o's very much O-verwhelmed the supposed hook, "get ridiculous". It could have very easily been called "O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O". Otoh, all the o's were in fact "getting ridiculous", though not so much in a flattering way.
Maybe if the o's were connected in some way with the hook, like, O-O-O-O-Oprah or O-O-O-O-OMG or having a big O,

I'm not sure that I didn't just reiterate what the screener said, though I probably do it in a less professional manner and more directly. I might say, "did you fart?" and the more professional response might be, " I smell sulfur",lol! The problem with the latter, is that the recipient might recall someone striking a match,lol! I could have come up with a better analogy, but I'm lazy, and that is the first one that popped into my head.

My advice is to drop the o's and write a chorus, because you really have a helluva song!!Kud-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-os! I really am getting ridiculous!