Awake All Night

[mikeShort]

I think this song is "done," but it hasn't been recorded, so it can still be made strong. What say you all?
Awake All Night
by Michael B. Short © 2016

Lying awake
Staring at the ceiling
There are a couple a cracks
That should have been repaired
Watching the fan
Spellbound by the spinning
Listening intenttly
For your step on the stair

Chorus
Tangled in the covers
Tender to the touch
I can't sleep
I'm dreaming too much
It's always been so easy for you
To keep me awake all night

Lost in your arms
Trying to get closer
Drowning in the moment
Then coming up for air
Watching you breathe
I'm one with the rhythm
Never letting go
As I silently stare

Chorus

Bridge
If the ceiling's still there I don't see it
And the fan could fly away into the wild blue
If I never sleep again
If I'm awake for every moment
It's a price that I will pay
To dream about you

Chorus

[Telefunkin]

Hi Again MiKe,
I chose to open this lyric because I liked your other one so much. Great promise again, but perhaps a bit more work on this one in my humble opinion.
I have a few comments, but they're just my thoughts.

The last lines of V1 made me think the singer was waiting for their partner to return home.
The chorus is consistent with that thought (although the line 'I'm dreaming too much' could be confusing if the singer 'can't sleep' - My mind churns too much?).
So, by this point I thought I'd understood the lyric.
However, V2 is (I think) showing what the singer is 'dreaming' about, rather than elaborating on the restlessness they're suffering. That's quite a mind shift for me.
There's also a bit more potential confusion by saying 'If the ceiling's still there I don't see it' after earlier saying 'Staring at the ceiling, There are a couple a cracks That should have been repaired'. I'm not entirely sure that works, although its not a huge deal.

Anyway, just as a suggestion on how it might help to consider reorganising the sections, I hope you don't mind me rearranging things as follows (although I doubt the lines scan like this):

V1
Lying awake
Staring at the ceiling
There are a couple a cracks
That should have been repaired
Watching the fan
Spellbound by the spinning
Listening intently
For your step on the stair

Chorus
I've been..
Lost in your arms
Trying to get closer
Drowning in the moment
Then coming up for air
Watching you breathe
At one with the rhythm
Never letting go
As I silently stare

V2
Tangled in the covers
Tender to the touch
I can't sleep
I'm dreaming too much
It's always been so easy for you
To keep me awake all night

Chorus

Bridge
If the ceiling's still there I don't see it
And the fan could fly away into the wild blue
If I never sleep again
If I'm awake for every moment
It's a price that I will pay
To dream about you

Chorus
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Again, I like what you have here. Good luck with honing it to your own liking.