Blue collar country-rock

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iceman
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Blue collar country-rock

Post by iceman » Sat Dec 27, 2008 2:13 pm

Hi,Here's a country-rock song that I hope some will listen to and comment on. If you encounter errors in getting the song to play, try right clicking on the link, select: save target as, save to your computer and play it from there. http://www.taximusic.com/download/18775 ... s.RandySun Goes Down OR... You and MeWide open desert skiesIts damn hot, I drive a big truck with soda popMy day will end its just a matter of whenGot too much time to thinktoo much time spent lookin' back at where I've beenI ride a dotted line that leads to youI'll renew...next to you...on the back porch swingIt's you and me and the sun going downThat's where I'd rather be When I'm feelin' lost, this I'll be foundWatching the sun go downNever mind the heatNever mind that my new boots are kinda' tightI'm counting mile signs that lead to homeMy home...I'll be there...when the shadows grow longYou and me and the sun going downThat's when my hope returnsForget about the day and the things that went wrongWatching the sun go down and down and down==instrumentalThe sky is bleeding red,putting the day to bedforget about town, we're stayin' home tonightYou and me and the sun going downIt's where I need to beThe world keeps changin around and aroundbut the sun still goes down and down and down and down and downHolding hands, when the sun's going downturn off the cell, don't bother me now We'll watch from the spot, where we fell in loveas the sun drops lower, lower Come on, come on and set me free

ideascapes
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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by ideascapes » Sat Dec 27, 2008 3:01 pm

iceman,I had no luck listening to the track either as an open or a right-click save. Sorry!Vince

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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by slowdance » Sat Dec 27, 2008 4:14 pm

Randy,Mp3 will not open.Regards,Dick

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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by putter232000 » Mon Dec 29, 2008 3:03 am

I read the lyrics and did not try the link. Maybe it is early and my coffee has not kicked in, AND I only read them once, BUT the lyrics really were not that coherent or conversational.

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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by matthoggard » Mon Dec 29, 2008 1:55 pm

Hey Randy,I feel that this is a little too southern rock. Trust me, Its the answer I get for nearly every song I post.The intro is a bit long. :23 til the vox start. I personally enjoy the song. Melody is nice. I like the play between the 2 voices. Has anyone told you (or this singer) that you/he sounds like David Lee Roth? Reminded me a bit of his song "Good Times" from the early 90's.The verse lyrics are pretty good. I can see the story unfolding and you have some pretty good imagery. Maybe you could expand on some of the ideas. "Wide open desert skies" doesnt quite set up the soda truck image. Just a few things I see that might be tweaked.The chorus hook is not really big enough. You need a little more lift and maybe step the vox up a pitch or 2 so it really makes it stand out.I like the finish of the chorus "down and down and down" has a nice sound. Maybe find a way to segue that into the next verse. The bridge is pretty good musically but lyrically it doesnt really sum up the story. I had a Nasville guy tell me that I should imagine a lawyer giving his summation in a case when writing lines for a bridge. I personally like the tune, Got it on repeat on my player and it makes me smile.Just tighten it up some man.Good job.M~

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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by iceman » Mon Dec 29, 2008 2:29 pm

Hey Matt,Thanks for taking the time. Yeh, that's me on the vox...and everything else except for the drums. David Lee Roth, eh? I'll take it. I don't profess to be a great singer and it is always a struggle. This is my first attempt at country. I'm a rock/blues player. If it comes off sounding like southern rock, I'll take it as well. Wide open desert sky? That would be sourthern Arizona where I live. In the middle of June. 110 degrees below a cloudess sky. Sure as hell makes one appreciate the sun going down. I initially planned to put more sounds or sound effects in the intro...something to make it more interesting and/or envoke an 'evening' vibe. Maybe some echoy guitar swells. Haven't gotten that far yet. I could always chop it off and start with the rock riff.You listened twice. That's really cool. Thanks so much!Randy

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Re: Blue collar country-rock

Post by billg » Mon Dec 29, 2008 5:20 pm

Hey Randy, this is a good song but the chorus isn't big and "hooky" enough for an artist pitch. May have luck with a film/tv placement but even those are getting pretty picky for the big hook or big (interestingor different) chorus.

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