Don't Know Where I Be

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jlt
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Don't Know Where I Be

Post by jlt » Tue Apr 05, 2022 5:50 pm

As you know, this is still under development. ANY IDEAS WOULD BE APPRECIATED.

I can not sing, but I did a "sample" recording of an example of how it could be sung by a real singer someday.

Here is an example: https://soundcloud.com/user-698453702/d ... where-i-be

I'm also known as Chucky Chopper


"Don't Know Where I Be"

VERSES
I Don't know where I'm going > C
I Don't know where I been > Dm
I Barely know where I be > F

My life has really changed
Things just ain't the same
Since that day when you left me

I'm always thinking of you
Wondering what you do
Will I ever see you again

CHORUS
My sky is never sunny
I always see a cloud
It's the same when I'm alone
Or when I'm with a crowd

My friends all think it's funny
But I think it's sad
They just don't understand
Why I hurt so bad

VERSES
Time keeps flying by
And I always wonder why
You had to say goodbye to me

My life has really changed
Things just ain't the same
Since that day when you left me

I'm always thinking of you
Wondering what you do
Will I ever see you again
---
Jerry Lee Taylor

Lane1777
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Re: Don't Know Where I Be

Post by Lane1777 » Sat Apr 09, 2022 10:05 pm

I`m no pro but My thought in this is,

keep the first verse, just change it a bit I think.

VERSES
I Don't know where I'm going > C

I Don't know where I been > Dm [Its hard to tell you where I`ve been] or
[don`t want to tell you where I`ve been]
[any statement] saying you don`t know where you been ? ] does not make sense to me, but thats just me.

I Barely know where I be > F [I Barely know where I`m going to be]

We all are different, and I like that part of writing and music, I`m working on a small song I`ll post it so you can judge a bit of my work too.
good or bad I`m ok with any comments. Lane

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Casey H
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Re: Don't Know Where I Be

Post by Casey H » Sun Apr 10, 2022 7:03 am

Hi CC
This is said in the spirit of helpfulness. Everyone starts somewhere. You really need to study some books on songwriting, there are lots of great ones out there by Robin Frederick, Jason Blume, Jai Josefs, Pat Pattison, and others.

Musically, your verses and choruses are the same. A chorus has to stand out, differentiated from the verse. Lyrically, it needs a lot but primarily your chorus doesn't focus on a lyrical hook, often the title. For example, here, your chorus good focus on "When will I see you again" which you end your verse with.

So read up. Also, listen to songs on the current Billboard charts in whatever genre you like.

Best
Casey

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