First song up for critiques

[lc]

I listened to it a few times and agree with a lot of what has already been said.Very nice production! For me, that's my Achilles heel. I do hear some artifacts with the vocals too, but that should be easily rectified.Very well structured and good lyrics. And like already mentioned, that chorus definitly has larger potential!Nicely done! Keep at it!

[exiled]

Hey Ibanez, Dax, LC! Thanks for your feedback!!! Yeah, I pretty much got a good idea about how to better this song thanks to all the great comments. This forum is awesome!I will be making some changes to the song tonight hopefully, and I'd love to know what you guys think of the updated version. I'll let you know when it's done.Thanks!

[questor]

I liked the song, and I think the vocals are fine....you probably could use a bit more strength in some spots, but your vocals seem to be on key and CLEAR and understandable....wish I had that "problem" Vocals have some nice attitude, but I think it would be even better if you added more, but that might be tougher on voice as I personally find that attitude can be harder to keep the strength of the voice consistent as well as on key...but maybe that's just me....anyway, the attitude is nice and I think even more (perhaps sliding closer to rock) might make the song shine even brighter or stronger.Anyway, nice tune...

[ncc1701]

Hey - I like this tune. Are you using pitch correction software on the vocals? I thought I caught a couple of very minor "stairsteps" on some moving lines ...If you are, there's one adjustment I would suggest. On my DAW I have Roland V-Vocal, which lets you adjust not only time and pitch, but also formant, which is the shape of the vowels. There's a default setting of +100 that links formant to pitch, but if I leave it there it makes my voice go chipmunk if I raise the pitch and growly if I lower it. I set the "pitch follow" to zero and then my voice sounds the same (unfortunately) no matter how I correct it. Within reason.Otherwise, this seems very marketable. You might also look at singer/songwriter listings for it.Kathleen

[exiled]

Wow, this thread came back from the dead!Thanks Questor, Kathleen, for taking the time to listen. I've gotten some very good feedback on this song, and I'm just waiting for a Taxi Critique to come back in order to cut a 2nd version.Kathleen, I'd love to pitch to singer/songwriter listings (after all, I sing and write songs ) but being in Mexico City I just don't see it happening... But who knows, in this global world anything can happen, right?