Is myfirst verse strong enough for ... ?

[TheWildManChris2000]

First verse strong enough for my new song "A Face to DIE For, and LOOKS that KILL"?

IS IT STRONG ENOUGH?
Any advice, feedback?
The second verse will talk about how Chris has a beautiful soul, but he wishes he could wrap himself up like the caterpillar he feels like, so his soul could emerge like a butterfly and be reflected in his body, not just in his eyes
In the third verse he sees a talk show about a guy who had cosmetic surgery to look like Michael Jackson. Chris then realizes he can one day get cosmetic surgery to look like Brad Pitt, although he is grieved he can not be attractive as HIS OWN UNIQUE PERSON.

FIRST VERSE:
Chris cut, styled and combed his hair
Chris bought himself a new wardrobe
THIS STILL DIDN’T GET CHRIS NOTICED BY THEM CHICKS in college

It was his friends, the men always telling him he was a nice-looking guy; but why never the women, the WOMEN! WOMEN…?
…
¨That Casey is a stud-muffin. Damn, I would fuck him!¨ Casey was Chris’s cousin...
¨Uhhh., Katy. Hi. MY name is CHRIS. Uhh - MAY I take you to the RAVE?”¨ÜHHH, NO thanks!


CHORUS:
CASEY HAD A FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Casey had that look that would kill chicks!
CHRIS DIDN'T HAVE THE FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Chris didn't have a look that would get chicks!

CASEY HAD A FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Casey had that look that would kill chicks!
CHRIS DIDN'T HAVE THE FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Chris didn't have a look that would get chicks!

CASEY HAD A FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Casey had that look that would kill chicks!
CHRIS DIDN'T HAVE THE FACE THAT IS TO DIE FOR! Chris didn't have a look that would get chicks!