My First Instrumental--have at it!

[sevenmusic]

The firs thing I heard while listening to this was sarah mclachlan, It's got a really cool vibe to it. Not sure about the production, souds pretty good to me I like it.

[hummingbird]

hey warren, this is pretty good! very nice playing. I agree with Matto re the melody. Not sure you even need those drums, the rim shots & stuff. I'd be tempted to use something else to indicate rythm. The cello could back off a little IMO. But overall an extremely good start (and much better than my first attempts at instrumentals!!)

[cjdenecia]

indeed warren ....who told you to do this? and why? cus ... well .... I dunno what goes on behind closed doors but this seems a scam ....why? cus based on what I gather here, you were told to take a song with vocals and make it an instrumental. which most certainly works sometimes - but in this case, all I hear is the missing vocals.it may be how you represented the vocals melody in such a non human way with the guitar but I don't buy it. I hear the human voice in that melody ... and anything short of it in this case - is substandard.the whole treatment, progression, beat, timing and structure bleeds "singer song". and I've heard the people you have sing your stuff and they could have absolutely killed this thing man. within the guidelines you've set down so intimately. and that picking the part guitar line doesn't convey that intimacy at all ... did you choose this one to strip or was it suggested?cus if you did, it's very excusable, I know, regardless of your extreme talents, you're looking for a little guidance in areas you haven't yet mastered (only cus you haven't tried yet - I'm certain, in a nano-second, you will = based on other criteria that proves you should have been a successful songwriter already), but if somebody told you to take THIS song and do this - lemme at 'em.it drools and bleeds and begs for vocals ....I hear how the melody can soar with a voice. I hear how it can fall ... and try as we might, there's nothing a guitar can do melodically that a voice can't do better with the right pipes. certainly not this one. and having heard some of your other stuff privately, I know you write from the heart - not from the perspective of "can I sell this?" .... but on this one, that seems convoluted by the presentation.production-wise ... so tight, yet a little more warmth is in order ... a bit of wet on the master will help ... no wait, the drums already have it - match the under guitar just a bit closer and when you use this 2nd guitar for fills - treat it with the same verb ... the lead electric ... assuming it came directly from the original, will be quite powerful cus it's simple and it's direct and it borrows slightly from the melody and yet it moves elsewhere.the strings ... nice .. they'll work well with the vocals when you put them back in.textbook entry of drums and bass ... some people go years without learning where you take a stripped arrangement and fill it in and you find it naturally ... on the mix, I like more bottom. but then again, I am an ass-man. well ... I like the ladies pendants too - more my wife's but I won't get into my bedroom fetishes here ... unless there's some money and fame to be had ... anyway, this song needs to go back to where I guess you had it warren ... maybe with some specialty listing you work this version but it needs that voice and your words in it.it's like gibby without hardy ... birds with no wings ... the gyspsy with no chevvy ... don't hate me, I'm only the one with the music that disappoints the whole world singing .... so what cred can you give me?

[anne]

"The one thing that's not working very well for me is the melody. This is not a great melody for an instrumental piece, it's too simplistic and there's not enough melodic contrast between the sections. Each section has those long strings of repeated notes that sound somewhat stiff and don't flow well. It definitely sounds like a melody that was formerly accompanied by a lyric and is still being held hostage by that lyric - not an "instrumental" melody.This brings up an interesting point: I think a lot of times when we write songs, we "settle" for a less than stellar melody because it sounds okay with the lyric. This is particularly true in my experience when the lyrics and melody are written simultaneously by singing while strumming the guitar or playing chords on a keyboard. While we usually go back and rewrite the lyric we come up with in this fashion, we often leave that initial melody alone.Now I'm not saying that initial melody never works...but I do think it never hurts to take another look at it...So my thinking here is, as an instrumental, this needs a stronger, more engaging and more interesting melody. And I would be surprised if that new and improved melody wouldn't also lift the parent song to new heights."TEMPORARY HIJACK ALERT FOR THIS THREAD....Matt - this is a clear explanation that I have been looking for for my own guitar instrumentals. I was going to ask if Warren and Marty could touch on this earlier as I have been having some trouble working on these type of songs. They sound good in theory - i.e humming them - but then they sound kind of repetitive or unfulfilled (maybe that is a better way to put it) when I record the melody on guitar. Just wanted to selfishly say thanks for your post - it answered some questions I was going to ask tomorrow ...BACK TO YOUR REGULAR PROGRAMMING....

[wta]

Heizy, I love this tune, a real GREAT tune. I would like to have more of a varity in the verses and chorus with the way the guitar was played. The finger picking is a great feel but not enough to carry the whole melody. I'd try a combination of guitar styles or even a combination of instruments to pull this off. I personally can't say the melody is right or wrong for an instrumental but I can say I'd like to hear more dynamics in volume and passive to aggressive play which is VERY hard to do with finger picking. I feel the kind of dynamic needed would need more styles of play. Maybe tring different instruments in each of the verses like a guitar wtih a couple of styles of play in one, a piano on another and maybe a combo of guitar and piano... See what I mean. I think for sure that this is a great cut for the direction but I would encourage more time in the musical writing and experimentation and see whatelse might work better. It's a darn hard thing to know "before" going into the studio if you don't have the instruments yourself to jam the piece until it works. I know your working at a distance with your studio crew and this is where it gets hard without racking up alot of studio time to figure it out the possiblities before making a final descion... Tough one mate. I'm on my third go around and I'm liking it more and more but I still would like more variety. I LOVE that lead electric guitar tone and the contrast between that and the finger picked acoustic, I wonder how they would sound sharing the melody having them swap back and forth with a melody and harmony line each... nice ending... GREAT TUNE! Man you do good work. wta

[Casey H]

Hi WarrenNice job!! I applaud you for branching out into instrumentals to go after some placements. This is very close. I agree with Matto... The first 15 seconds are great but when the melody line comes in it's too repetitive and just not developed enough. It wouldn't take much to fix-- just throw in some variations along the scales you are in so as not to have as many repeat notes.That being said, right now, when there are calls for short pieces-- 15, 30, 60 seconds, you could probably put something very usable from what's here. I hope you'll develop the melody more! Nice work Marty! Casey

[cameron]

Warren,Brighter minds than mine (Vince, Bill, Mazz, etc.) have already mentioned what stood out to me, but I like the song and I would guess that you could have good luck placing it if you could just get the guitar player to loosen up a bit.Nice work all in all though.Cam

[wrdsnmuzik]

Just to add to the cacophony . . . I think this is a VERY impressive instrumental debut. Great use of space in the production, good performance, perhaps most important of all: good mood!I agree that the guitar melody is a bit stiff and needs something more ear-catching, but that seems eminently fixable. mainly, I wanted to lead with the positive, cos I think people are kind of recycling the same opinion here: this is SO good, but could be even BETTER.well done, gw

[geo]

Hey Warren..... nice job.... everytime I hear something Martin did I wish I could afford him....I like this ... though I do hear the stiffness in the lead....I would follow Casey's suggestion and edit down two or three different pieces.... one to three minutes long..Good stuff!!Peace, Geo

[feaker]

warrenI feel bad cause I know you were excited and you put alot into this.I also know you will never give up on anything.Your friendpaul