Need Some Raw & Honest Feedback on This Song

[TheElement]

Sounds good and strong!

It felt like the Sidechained Piano Intro (Which I Like) just dragged the groove back a bit
In other words, I didn't feel a strong groove to the opening, listened to just that about 7 times and can't put my finger on it...
Who Knows?

Cool Tune for sure!

Thanks Cass. Much appreciated the feedback. It might be the way its mixed. or it needs something else? I have been remixing all last night.

[TheElement]

Hey Gavin

Cool song! Warning: Don't take my word - I have no clue re AC/pop, but you want me picking at it.
Production sounds very good to me, but some transients on the vocals feel very harsh (the start of the "hoo-hoo-hoo" sounds almost like "coo" at 0:57).
I am not sure about the vinyl effect (in this form) at the start. It almost sounds like a chimney fire - and is not picked up or present later.
I feel the chorus/hook could/should stand out more. I possibly lean more towards the very emotional/anthemic side musically. Maybe some additional instrumentation (pads/horns) could do that?
The gap feels a tiny bit long.
My kids 1.5 and 7 have now gotten their LED disco ball out. They were already bopping along earlier.
Not sure this helps at all.

Good luck!!
Tom

Thanks Tom for the feedback. I havent touched the vocals yet. I need to work on them later.

Definitely get where you are coming with the chimney fire lol yeah sounds a bit like that so in new mix I turned it down and adjusted a few things so its more believable and sounds like someone is playing a record player.

[TheElement]

Hey man, sorry to me mix is not there yet. Low end sounds muffled, and the high end sounds too compressed and lifeless. I don't get the omph, clarity and excitement for this genre.
Maybe scoop out some lows where you can, dip some 450, and automate in stead of compressing the vocals?

Tbh, I would scratch it and start again with mixing from the vocals. It sounds like you have worked too much on the mix and got lost.

Thanks! Yes went in a remixed from the ground up. Tried to make the drums especially the kick hit harder and cleaner in low end. a few people mentioned the kick not being as clear so carved more space out for it and brought it up in new mix. I think low end is better now. Still working on it..

[TheElement]

sent you a PM, but basically I'm feeling what kolstad and cass are feeling, especially in the opening of the track. best of luck!

Thanks will check

[TheElement]

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Need Some Raw & Honest Feedback on This Song
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Post by TheElement » Wed Jun 24, 2020 10:19 pm
Don't hold back. Please tear it apart.

Hey Gavin, great song!

You just need to make it BANG!

As Cass mentioned the side chained piano... Take out 320Hz.

I would suggest..

Put a bell curve filter sweep over the whole mix and sweep it down from the intro after the record noise to transition from that vibe. Land it at "sleep".

You need a rise coming up to "stressing me" and to lose the piano there and go to a bass.
You need a hard edge on top of the side chained synth bass [new] in the sides. Filter out the low end on that.

You need a sweep down at "falling off the surface'. I'd stop the beat at falling to give a sense off free fall. Then HIT it on the beat before "hood ooo"

I'd like to hear some percussion or arpeggios [32nd note?, I'm not the best on musical timings ] come in after that. You could change the kick/snare/rhythm up a bit later in the song after 1:45 to the end for some variation.

Anyway, that's my 2 cents .
More differentiation between the sections with better builds and transitions, [the piano through out gets old pretty quick].
Replace the SC piano with a bass and put a layer on top in the sides with some grit].
Add elements to push the song forward for more momentum and excitement.

Thanks Lester! Much appreciated the feedback. I have taken notes.

[TheElement]

Some quick thoughts...

Vocal processing needs some help. The secondary vocal track ("Can't control" at 35 sec) is too loud and present, and it takes away from what should be the focus. Delay throws need some work as well. The super long feedback delay you used at times isn't really doing it imo.

The top end synth at 48 seconds sounds dated.

Mix balance seems off as a whole. For pop, you need some punchier bottom end. Probably a mixture of needing some eq carving out, getting a compressor on the kick to smash the tail a bit and focus on the transient a bit more, and just creating more space for stuff as a whole. I did a track a while back with a similar vibe on the sidechain stuff if you want to listen to how the bottom end sits: https://soundcloud.com/andrew_jordan_mu ... -me-forget (it's an instrumental, but hopefully it gives you an idea of what I'm talkin about)

Dynamically, the song felt a little flat. There were some other great suggestions about about some breaks, drop offs, etc. I'd try experimenting with that stuff in order to bring it to life a bit more.

Cool song, and best of luck with it!

Andrew

Thanks Andrew! Great track btw. Yeah I am working on the low end in the new mix to make it punchier. I started from the ground up and making sure the low end is tight and now mixing the other elements on top. Still working on it. I haven't touched the vocals yet. I want to get the music sorted first then will tackle the vox. I have taken notes. Much appreciate the feedback!

[TheElement]

HA... you've gotten so many suggestion already... I think I'll just wait to see/hear if/when you post an upgraded re-mix;
if there's time before your deadline, that is.
Cheers & good luck - reads like a cool project.
Peter

Yeah will post the remix. Will take a while. Got lots to do.Music video being shot 2nd week in July so music will need to be finished when video finished. I wish we could get a professional mix engineer to deal with the mix. lol not really my job

[TheElement]

More differentiation between the sections with better builds and transitions
[...]
Add elements to push the song forward for more momentum and excitement.

Yes, that is kind of what I meant by chorus/hook needs to stand out more.

Working on it. Thanks

[TheElement]

Off the bat without reading any of the other replies

Vinyl crackle...I would lose that, I think that went out of style a decade ago

The sidechain on the reverse piano feels like the groove is wrong - I get what your going for but it's not working for some reason..maybe try not bringing the sidechain in until the rest of the track kicks in ?

Around 15s when the low end stuff comes in it sounds a bit odd, like you've low pass filtered it and winds up sounding like when the neighbour is playing their music too loud and you hear a muffled kinda low end coming through the walls. What ever effect that is I don't think it's doing the track any favours. Most tracks in this genre have the Drums and Bass as the loudest thing in the track. I think you might need to bypass a lot of the processing you have done and rebuild a new balance that focuses more on the low being clean and a lot more hard hitting and on not have the vocal as the loudest element.

30s - Synth sounds a bit retro, difficult to call it without any ref tracks from the artist but it's probably not what I would choose..or at least if I did I would be treating it with some cool FX

50s - It's here that I expected the mix to open out but it didn't. Those muffled sounding filters on the low end stuff if you were going to use them as transition stunt are screaming out to change right there. Conversely if you lose your early sidechain piano it's the ideal place to bring it back. I also think your chorus would benefit from some 16 note percussion ( shakers or whatever ) to give it some energy and help it stand out more than the verse

1:09 Not enough section to section contrast here, Verse 2 should have something new for us ..a new hook, riff whatever

1:42 There's a chance here to make the end of that verse more dramatic and reset the listeners ears for the next chorus. You did it a little but I feel you could go a lot further. As it stands it falls a little flat.

Over all I think the vocal is eating up too much mix real estate so the rest of the track sounds small in comparison. Probably over 10 years ago now but I remember there was an interview with the guy mixed Maroon 5's " Makes Me Wonder " and in it he mentioned how he kept the vocals really tucked in so he could make drums & bass sound bigger. I often use that track as a reference mix for vocal size if mixing pop songs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAebYQgy4n4

Mark

Thanks Mark! I haven't touched vocal yet. Need to get music sorted first. But will definitely check out that youtube. Thanks!

It seem the clarity of the low end is a problem and in the new mix I have brought that out and drums hit harder.

Definitely we are working on adding some transitional elements. Some drum fills before drops. Shaker sounds interesting. Might try that.

I think I need to play around with some ear candy. might make parts more interesting. Thanks again for the feedback!

[TrevFury]

Hi there.

I'm new here, so forgive my newb status on the meter. lol

The song sounds really good overall. The only thing that takes me out of it a bit is the timing of the secondary vocal lines. They're pretty consistently behind the beat, which is distracting to me as a listener. That could be a stylistic choice, I don't know.
That guy can really sing. Thumbs up on the vocalist.

All in all, it's well done. You asked for it to be mercilessly torn apart, and I'm not able to do that. Shift the improvised, in-between vocal lines to line up more closely with the grid and my ears would be happier. That's it.

Best of luck!