Building a studio computer

[nomiyah]

Quote:I've spent a long while learning how to mix, since I've always had my tracks mixed by a pro studio.Besides learning to mix, I've had to conquer an seemingly endless learning curve in my new studio system.I'm finally ready to play you something. This is a song called Couldn't Walk Away that was on my 2005 CD. After getting feedback from Taxi, Steve Seskin, West Coast Songwriters and some of you here on the forum, I've rewritten and rerecorded it. So you might have heard a version of it but here is the new and improved song.I've improved from being a total mix-challenged idiot. You tell me if you think it's broadcast-ready yet. Am I on the right track or is it back to the drawing board? I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts.Nomihttp://www.taxi.com/nomiCouldn't Walk AwayDear forum panel of experts:This is the the very first tune I've ever mixed and I'd appreciate some mixing feedback!!!!!!!! http://www.taxi.com/nomiCouldn't Walk Away

[aubreyz]

Quote:Quote:I've spent a long while learning how to mix, since I've always had my tracks mixed by a pro studio.Besides learning to mix, I've had to conquer an seemingly endless learning curve in my new studio system.I'm finally ready to play you something. This is a song called Couldn't Walk Away that was on my 2005 CD. After getting feedback from Taxi, Steve Seskin, West Coast Songwriters and some of you here on the forum, I've rewritten and rerecorded it. So you might have heard a version of it but here is the new and improved song.I've improved from being a total mix-challenged idiot. You tell me if you think it's broadcast-ready yet. Am I on the right track or is it back to the drawing board? I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts.Nomihttp://www.taxi.com/nomiCouldn't Walk AwayDear forum panel of experts:This is the the very first tune I've ever mixed and I'd appreciate some mixing feedback!!!!!!!! http://www.taxi.com/nomiCouldn't Walk AwayNomi,First listen--- too much highs on the percussion. Also, the vocal is too out front for my taste--- though I do lean toward making the vox a part of the whole, and there are some cases when the vox needs to be more out front. There are some elements of the mix that just go away at lower levels. A good way to check a mix is to turn your monitors down all the way, and then turn them up so you can just barely hear the mix. Are there some important elements missing? Can you still hear the kick and bass? Do the same kind of thing on other speakers... the car, laptop, home stereo, etc. If you do this during the mixing process it will help a lot as far as balancing everything.Now with that said--- you know my posts well enough to know I can be brutally frank... so hold on.If you perfect everything in this mix, fix a few of the vocal issues, etc... it's still just an average song at best. You've been toying with this one from at least 2005... you've got better stuff in you. It's okay to be using this as a test for mixing technique, etc, but I'd love to be hearing you pushing the boundaries and spending more time on new stuff. I learn more from starting over than going back to fix something. Rewriting is important, but sometimes you can spend so much time and have such a long history with a song, that it just ain't gonna get much better.Hope that's not too blunt... but now you have these new, better toys to play with. Blow my socks off with a better song!Aub

[nomiyah]

Thanks for the feedback, Aub. I definitely appreciate honesty. I did think the vocals were too upfront but people kept advising me to turn them up, maybe I overdid it. I do listen low and on different systems like you suggest. Guess I'll just keep working on it.I do have lots of new stuff and could easily post a new song every day like some people here do. But I like rewriting and often work on a song for many years. Sometimes it pays off in a much improved song and sometimes it doesn't. I actually like this song a lot but I'll be sure to try a new one on you next time.I'm actually happy that you didn't find more wrong with it. Using basics like compression and EQ are still new to me.Nomi

[nomiyah]

Here's the first song entirely from the new studio computer. The learning curve was extreme involving many many new things I had to figure out. Next one will be easier I'm sure. One thing that's new is it's my first song ever using pre-recorded drum loops, guess I'll join the 21st century.I posted the lyrics for this song awhile back and got some great feedback. Line 3 originally said "You were holding Vanity Fair" and I loved the way that line sang and how descriptive and original it was. But then Hookstown commented most men don't read Vanity Fair and I had to admit he was right. That's just one example of how useful forum feedback is, thanks for the help to all my forum friends!!!!http://www.nomiyah.com/dashboard/avgall ... ay.mp3KING FOR A DAY(Words & music by Nomi Yah)Verse 1I see you in the grocery storeI’ve never seen you beforeYou’re holding a magazineLooking over at my checkout laneI wink, catching your eyeI think, why should I be shyChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a dayVerse 2 You probably have a woman at homeYou probably like to be on your ownYou probably think of me as thoughI’m just a person saying helloDo you want to walk down the streetOr later on, get something to eatChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand, I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a dayBridgeDoesn’t hurt to flirtThe fact is you’re attractiveChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand, I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a day

[nomiyah]

Please excuse this squeaky-wheel bump. After all the time and effort everyone has helped with my studio, I'd love to tie this thread with a bow and get some reviews for this first song!!! Thanks.NomiQuote:Here's the first song entirely from the new studio computer. The learning curve was extreme involving many many new things I had to figure out. Next one will be easier I'm sure. One thing that's new is it's my first song ever using pre-recorded drum loops, guess I'll join the 21st century.I posted the lyrics for this song awhile back and got some great feedback. Line 3 originally said "You were holding Vanity Fair" and I loved the way that line sang and how descriptive and original it was. But then Hookstown commented most men don't read Vanity Fair and I had to admit he was right. That's just one example of how useful forum feedback is, thanks for the help to all my forum friends!!!!http://www.nomiyah.com/dashboard/avgall ... ay.mp3KING FOR A DAY(Words & music by Nomi Yah)Verse 1I see you in the grocery storeI’ve never seen you beforeYou’re holding a magazineLooking over at my checkout laneI wink, catching your eyeI think, why should I be shyChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a dayVerse 2 You probably have a woman at homeYou probably like to be on your ownYou probably think of me as thoughI’m just a person saying helloDo you want to walk down the streetOr later on, get something to eatChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand, I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a dayBridgeDoesn’t hurt to flirtThe fact is you’re attractiveChorusWhat will you doWhen a stranger admires youAt a distance and then approachesAnd holds out her hand, I hope youSmile and I’ll makeMake you feel like a king for a dayKing for a day

[nomiyah]

This is my latest song. What do you think?I'd appreciate comments on any of it... lyrics, melody, production, mix. Thanks for your ears.Nomihttp://www.nomiyah.com/dashboard/avgallery/med ... ed_Him.mp3(NOTE: THIS LINK WAS UPDATED WHEN I RERECORDED THE SONG. I DIDN'T SAVE THE OLD VERSION. UPDATED LYRICS ON 8/12/07 post)SHE HUGGED HIM(Words & music by Nomi Yah)Verse 1Christopher enlistedTo get out of the housePaycheck and tuitionOutweighed the doubtsHis father was proudBut Mother broke downChorus 1She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let goSun through the open doorGolden on the wooden floorMemory took a photoVerse 2Christopher got ordersWhen he was newlywedHad to leave earlyHis wife got out of bedShe was unclothedUnder a yellow silk robeChorus 2She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let goSun through the open doorGolden on wooden floorMemory took a photoBridgeStop-lossed soldierPassed the timeLooking at soothing picturesIn his mindVerse 3It’s hard on a marriageNot to be togetherHe was unpreparedWhile opening that letterThose words were bad as bombsHe went back to Dad and Mom’sChorus 3She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let go

[Casey H]

Quote:This is my latest song. What do you think?I'd appreciate comments on any of it... lyrics, melody, production, mix. Thanks for your ears.Nomihttp://www.nomiyah.com/dashboard/avgallery/med ... Him.mp3SHE HUGGED HIM(Words & music by Nomi Yah)Verse 1Christopher enlistedTo get out of the housePaycheck and tuitionOutweighed the doubtsHis father was proudBut Mother broke downChorus 1She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let goSun through the open doorGolden on the wooden floorMemory took a photoVerse 2Christopher got ordersWhen he was newlywedHad to leave earlyHis wife got out of bedShe was unclothedUnder a yellow silk robeChorus 2She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let goSun through the open doorGolden on wooden floorMemory took a photoBridgeStop-lossed soldierPassed the timeLooking at soothing picturesIn his mindVerse 3It’s hard on a marriageNot to be togetherHe was unpreparedWhile opening that letterThose words were bad as bombsHe went back to Dad and Mom’sChorus 3She hugged him a long timeShe hugged him and didn’t let goHi NomiYou know I'm a fan of your music... I don't think this is production ready at all so I think it would be better to nail down the song first. I agree with Randy that there is something forced and non-emotional about the way the song is sung, almost like the lyrics came first and someone tried to fit them to music. My thoughts... What genre are you looking to target? My guess would be that songs with this type of story would fit country the best. I would try to nail down a killer "she hugged him" chorus as this one might not be strong enough (it's close, though)... It just hit me that the music for the first 2 chorus lines could be moved to the bridge if you re-do the chorus music. You might not need the last 3 lines of your current chorus- right now they sound more like another verse than part of the chorus.Now, this may not be where you want to go but, think about speeding up the tempo, make it guitar driven, and going country with it. I know you recently went to Nashville, so were you already thinking of country?Just MHO... could make a great country song with some re-work... Casey

[aubreyz]

Nomi,I'm not ignoring you-- just slammed. I'll get you some feedback as soon as I see some light at the end of the tunnel that is not a train!Aub

[sgs4u]

Quote:This is my latest song. What do you think?I'd appreciate comments on any of it... lyrics, melody, production, mix. Thanks for your ears.Nomihttp://www.nomiyah.com/dashboard/avgallery/med ... _Him.mp3Hi Nomi, The drum patterns/sounds don't feel right to me. Most of the vocal rhythms and keyboards seem to point towards a half time feel, rather than what you've chosen. I find the drums to get in the way of the tenderness of the song concept. It also sounds like the same exact drum fill was used too many times. I could be wrong.happened of what you've presented. The drums also seem very panned to the left side, I checked out my system to be sure. The drum tempo is around 138. The song could easily be sped up as Casey pointed out. But this song really does sound like a ballad, or singer/songwriter stuff. That kind of treatment suits the content of the rhythms in your melody, IMHO. So I would suggest speeding up the song to 144(but make the drums play @ 72bpm.)The vocal sound - strange ambience/phasing on it. The 2nd time you sing "hugged him," is really pretty. More flowery stuff like that in a few more places please! There are times when you hold notes that I think would be more dramatic if you cut them off, ie: house, doubts, vs1, letter vs3. (or chose licks, like hugged) And sometime it sounds like some pitch correction has grabbed a note and is making it mechanical. I could be wrong. It definitely sounds like you're trying to be too careful, trying to hit the notes you want. So the singing ends up sounding a little forced, not relaxed enough, in places. You might wanna smooth out that last sustained chord at the end of the track. The extra string note doesn't need to be there, just add some sustain to the previous chord.I love the lyrics, they're aren't yet enough songs about wars and the futility of them. I often don't understand people's posts, let alone their lyrics, so I have to ask one question. In the 3rd verse, what was in the letter that made the soldier go back home?If you get around to re-doing anything, I'll be happy to listen again. As long as I'm with Taxi (which could be a long time, at this rate), I will owe you a debt of gratitude for starting that wonderful thread, which deserves another bump!Nomi don't take No!

[nomiyah]

Quote:[quote author=nomiyah board=nick thread=1149663295 post=1186734787] But I've come to know you as someone who works and re-works a song till you get it right. Randy,That's true, you've got my number. I'll post another version later on.Nomi