"Wonder Of All Wonders" Hoping for critiques

[daskitso]

http://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_ ... eam=trueHi Everyone,I would love to get critiques to all my music eventually. I have all genres of music most of which would either have to be placed in a "Retro" gig or re-demo with an updated production.Before I re-demo I would like to get as much feedback as possible. Especially as to which genre the songs best fit or should be tailored to. The fist song link above is for a piece titled "Wonder of all wonders", and there is another rendition of the song on my page at www.taxi.com/daskitso if you would be willing to compare them. Other songs are in the genres of R&B, Rock, Rap, Blues, so if you have a particular tasteplease feel free to find your favorite for critique.Thanks so much for the help,Bubba

[deantaylor]

Bubba,Took a listen to 'Wonder' .. just the first rendition link. To me, the best genre musically seems like Adult Contemporary or Easy Listening, but I think the lyric might be a little 'too cliche' for these genres. So, maybe it could work in pop where lyric content is not as important. Just a quick opinion, I could be wrong. I am not sure, I didn't get a really strong feeling.Dean

[daskitso]

Thanks for the input. I'll probably do some re-working after I get a bit more feedback. Hopefully you won't be the only one. lol.

[chrisbee]

Quote:Thanks for the input. I'll probably do some re-working after I get a bit more feedback. Hopefully you won't be the only one. lol.Hey Skits! I agree with Dean about the pop -vs- r&b genre stuff. I also listened to a few other songs on your TAXI artist page, just to get a feel for who you are as a writer and artist. I'm not sure what you want to do, whether you want to be "the artist" who does your music or if you just want to a writer for others. But the answer to that is an important thing.If you just want to be a writer, one idea would be to hire a serious crooner to sing this tune. Once it's up to date production-wise, a great voice like that (I'm thinking a voice similar to Peabo Bryson, the late Luther, etc) might be a good representation to an A&R person of where your song belongs. If you want to be the artist however, in all sincerity, you need to take it up a notch from the demos. Your voice is pitchy in spots. For a tune that rides on a singer like this does, you're gonna need to be able to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with the fantastic voices from that era like Peabo.Good luck & keep writing, bro! cb

[daskitso]

Thanks CB for the input. I would love to sign a deal as an artist, but in all reality I'm probably too old, too fat and too white. And I would be perfectly happy to place them with a signed artist. But that being said, I know these are "Pitchy" yet I feel I have the vocals in me to be right where you suggested and it may be an excuse, but cutting demos in one or two takes with producers whose studios are in the middle of the living room unfortunately does not lend itself to the best work. A few of the critiques that I've received from submissions actually did make Luther comparisons, not that I am any where near his league, but I can do much better with a proper studio and or the finances to take my time and get it right.I guess that's what I was hoping to accomplish with my cheep demos, was to find a producer who could hear the potential to help me do it right. And /or sell them to a label for another artist. But if and when I can re-record these I need to make them "This era". Maybe more of a Musique Soulchild or John Legend.

[deantaylor]

I do think Luther or John Legend-ish might be a good way to go with this song.Dean

[paults]

Melodically, "Wonder" reminds me of Contemporary Christian songs - it has that kind of uplifting and inspirational pop quality to it. You may want to consider that kind of a re-write, rather than trying to make it sound like current mainstream radio.

[daskitso]

Thanks everyone for the notes. I'm storing them all away until I can find a producer that I click with so I can re-record. I am unfortunately no musician and have no production skills to speak of. I would like to find a producer (Near me in OC, CA) who likes and feels what I'm doing rather than hire someone blindly to try and force the chemistry. Any referrals would be appreciated.Thanks again,Bubba