Is this Contemporary Country?

[johnhampt]

Arranged this song differently as well as added some piano. I will get some pro. crits. For now, I am keeping my lyrics because my mind is blank for a new theme. It may be a trite theme but it's all I got for now. I made the chorus happen much quicker so I think that helps. Let me know.... Thanks yall'!!!!

[sgs4u]

Well, I think it's much mo betta, now. Much more enjoyable this time. That was fast re-arranging, good work. I like the singing right away, with no intro. Your voice is pretty convincing. I didn't notice how much the new piano might have helped the song, sorry. Don't even remember the old version, which to me is a good sign. I do remember NOT liking it (the 1st version), and not knowing what to suggest. Also never got around to listening to the version w harmonica on it. The 1st line, about the ring, seems like you've wasted it. Maybe because there isn't anything quite as strong an image, after it. I really like the B sect(climb), musically. I think it sets up the chorus quite well. But the lyric, "that that one was you" just doesn't make sense from a song lyric perspective to me. There's gotta be a better way to say it. chs - Letting go is the first step on the dismal road to pain. Somehow, that seems like you've got the direction, you're heading, wrong. You move away from pain, as in the rest of the chorus. Maybe that line could be something about the "Path Away from Pain" But as you can tell, lyrics are not my strong suit. I do think you need an entirely new second verse, that pull out deeper feelings from your description of events, rather than talking about what the gal looked like. IMHO The chorus melody, however, still isn't in a higher range than the verses. So the chorus still doen't really go anywhere bigger, it probably should. Again, just my humble opinion.As for people thinking some people's opinions matter more than others, you get to pick the suggestions you think work for you and your song. Everyone's a critic, especially on a public forum. Sometimes those opinions are clouded with info that can be misleading. BC, is absolutely correct with that. The pro critiques are really going to tell you how far away you are from a forwardable song. Ask great questions. Ask them what else would be great subject matter for the lyrics. Ask which of your lines are keepers. Ask everything that occurs to you. Ask too much. steveQuote:Arranged this song differently as well as added some piano. I will get some pro. crits. For now, I am keeping my lyrics because my mind is blank for a new theme. It may be a trite theme but it's all I got for now. I made the chorus happen much quicker so I think that helps. Let me know.... Thanks yall'!!!!