Please give me your honest feedback

[Pinkstar]

Hi there, please visit my personal myspace page http:///www.myspace.com/jvbmusic and let me know what you think about the songs "I don't wanne" and "Heal". I want to finish "I don't wanne" and I'm not sure what would improve the song. I really appreciate your input!oxoxoxoxoJVBhttp://www.myspace.com/ottosdaughter

[vhee]

well it all meshes a bit in tone and sound. The mixing for me is a bit of an issue with the song, the 500 up to like 3k need to be backed off and the bass needs more compression. Your voice come through pretty clear which is good.Considering the style of music you doing,asking how to improve it to be more like your genre is beyond me at this point.I do have to say though this is very reminiscent of the early 80's "new wave" as they called it then, you might venture on google and find some samples that may add to your repitoire of ideas for enhancement. Good luck, blazing look btw, very appealing.

[Pinkstar]

thank you very much for your feedback...you are talking EQ don't you? that went right over my head, lol I've produced two people over the past month and my goal is to get better at mixing, I actually am getting better but I admit that as of right now I stricktly go by ear, tweeking the nobs till it sounds pleasing to my ear but knowing db's would probably save me a whole lot of time. I appreciate your advice. ~Jacqueline

[rnrmachine]

I really liked "Heal" it has some nice elements to it and the vocal is "attractive". The recording quality is decent (I am listening on a pair of E-mu PM5 studio monitors and Klipsch B-2 Stereo speakers with a sub. A/Bing between the two and it sounds pretty good.) Obviously not recorded/mastered in a top notch studio but good job.Now the rough part... "I Don't Wanna" shows a definite lack of experience in mixing/EQing to sit things into a mix. You have a problem here what us sound engineers use to call "mud in the mix" or it seems "too muddy" This is always more common in faster songs because there is so much more going on. IF I was going over your mix the first thing I would do is drop all FX and start fresh. All the music has too much on it. Your vocals sit nice because they do not have too much compared to the music. Making it easy for them to stand out. Also, this song strikes me more as a song that needs everything to stand up front as much as possible. To add a smash-mouth attack which is obvious in the song but not the recording. You lose a lot of listener effect here.Posting for the moment... be back with more advice for "I Don't Wanna" hopefully before you read this.OK, I listened even more to "I Don't wanna" and I thought a bit about how to explain this to you in a lamens way.The best way to explain to you about how the music sounds compared to the vocal (as stated above about too much FX probably reverb) it sounds like the band is in another room while the singer is performing in front of us, the listeners. The guitar on the right side is very close to good as is. I would back off the reverb on it very little. I would also send the right guitar to a buss with a VERY SHORT tempo sync'd delay and pan the to the left (or just play another guitar part left side panned but the delayed be easier) This will add "drive" to the "smash-mouth" effect I believe this song needs. The drums are just TOO FAR away from the rest of the "band" so to speak, so back off the verb a lot on those. The snare drum almost always will be just under the vocal in mix. So, if you have control over the snare get that to standout a lil more. It may come out enough just from backing off the reverb on the drums but I doubt it. The bass guitar didn't sound fresh and solid enough for this song. Like a lot of the "support" for your vocal is lost in the "other room" I would make sure it is well compressed like vhee mentioned but I would also send the bass to a "buss" with a stereo chorus to liven up the higher frequencies in the bass. This song strikes me as a song that NEEDS the bass solid all the way through it. To get that "In Your Face" effect (smash-mouth). Now, on the Buss with the stereo chorus for the bass it is important that you use an equalizer here. You need to cut out all the low end From the chorus so the deep part of the bass stays solid. This can be achieved a few ways. The best way is to use what is called a "high pass" filter or equalizer setting that will cut out everything BELOW a certain frequency, allowing only the sound above a particular setting to be heard. In this case the setting can vary a lot. Anywhere from 200Hz up to 1kHz. It truly depends how it is sitting in the mix. The numbers I gave you are an OK "rule of thumb" but by no means an end all.As far as the song itself I think it will be SO much more appealing as it is with these changes that the only thing I really feel I need to mention is. The part where you sing "come and get me" about 2:4 according the the crappy myspace player, is a lil bit weird to be so in your face. But I don't think you should change it I think it is a good end to that song. It just needs to be treated a bit to make it more "appealing" and less "strange"I think you should have a CD of Avril Lavigne's "Skater Boy" to listen to when you mix this song. I think it would help you a lot in getting "I don't wanna" mixed in a way that will do this song justice. Now, do not expect to achieve the quality or power level that song has. Just try and get things to mesh in the mix the same way and your song will be a whole lot better and more appealing. Once that is done I might like it better then I like "Heal" and I like that pretty much.On a side note, I miss playing out a lot but not enough to go looking for people at this time. Although, after hearing you and seeing your pic's on myspace. With the way the industry just loves women now a days, I am wishing you and I were local to eachother, with my guitar playing, engineering abilities and your sorta strange but definite sex appeal in your appearance as well as your voice we could have a lot of fun blowing people away. Oh well, back to my crap and good luck.. I truly hope this helps you and you can find people who will compliment your style.EDIT: I thought I would give ya link to one of my latest songs just so ya could hear something from me if you are curious. http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... hgbndsq=1I have a lot more stuff that is in MANY styles. Feel free to check out my other stuff on broadjam. Most of those songs are recorded years ago on crappy home recording gear and I only did em when I was bored. Another song I like of my own is "Give" it's a lot rockier then "Why Daddy Why" but by no means my most rockin' song. lol http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... yhgbndsq=1 That song was recorded on a soundblaster audigy 2 platinum and a Behringer mixer with an electric guitar bought at Bestbuy. I was proving to a friend (after he was complaining about his crappy gear) that you can get good recordings now a days with not so great gear and I think I did a good job at showing it. HAHA

[Pinkstar]

wow, thank you so much for the detailed message, your advice and feedback. I really appreciate that. Starting fresh is a great idea; I will definatly do that. The drums are fake, I like BFD, it's gonna be easy for me to make them sound better I listened back to Heal the other day and totally agree, the mix is pretty shitty. I started re-working that one. So yeh, it's not your speakers. Okay, I'll go and check out your music and hit ya back.Btw, I don't know if you went on my bands page, I do have a band and they are all kick ass solid musicians...it took me a while to find them but I did You should get back out there and play some shows, it's fun.http://www.myspace.com/ottosdaughterI'll hit you back tomorrow regarding your music. Again, thanks so much for taking the time to give me your feedback.xoxoxoJ Quote:I really liked "Heal" it has some nice elements to it and the vocal is "attractive". The recording quality is decent (I am listening on a pair of E-mu PM5 studio monitors and Klipsch B-2 Stereo speakers with a sub. A/Bing between the two and it sounds pretty good.) Obviously not recorded/mastered in a top notch studio but good job.Now the rough part... "I Don't Wanna" shows a definite lack of experience in mixing/EQing to sit things into a mix. You have a problem here what us sound engineers use to call "mud in the mix" or it seems "too muddy" This is always more common in faster songs because there is so much more going on. IF I was going over your mix the first thing I would do is drop all FX and start fresh. All the music has too much on it. Your vocals sit nice because they do not have too much compared to the music. Making it easy for them to stand out. Also, this song strikes me more as a song that needs everything to stand up front as much as possible. To add a smash-mouth attack which is obvious in the song but not the recording. You lose a lot of listener effect here.Posting for the moment... be back with more advice for "I Don't Wanna" hopefully before you read this.OK, I listened even more to "I Don't wanna" and I thought a bit about how to explain this to you in a lamens way.The best way to explain to you about how the music sounds compared to the vocal (as stated above about too much FX probably reverb) it sounds like the band is in another room while the singer is performing in front of us, the listeners. The guitar on the right side is very close to good as is. I would back off the reverb on it very little. I would also send the right guitar to a buss with a VERY SHORT tempo sync'd delay and pan the to the left (or just play another guitar part left side panned but the delayed be easier) This will add "drive" to the "smash-mouth" effect I believe this song needs. The drums are just TOO FAR away from the rest of the "band" so to speak, so back off the verb a lot on those. The snare drum almost always will be just under the vocal in mix. So, if you have control over the snare get that to standout a lil more. It may come out enough just from backing off the reverb on the drums but I doubt it. The bass guitar didn't sound fresh and solid enough for this song. Like a lot of the "support" for your vocal is lost in the "other room" I would make sure it is well compressed like vhee mentioned but I would also send the bass to a "buss" with a stereo chorus to liven up the higher frequencies in the bass. This song strikes me as a song that NEEDS the bass solid all the way through it. To get that "In Your Face" effect (smash-mouth). Now, on the Buss with the stereo chorus for the bass it is important that you use an equalizer here. You need to cut out all the low end From the chorus so the deep part of the bass stays solid. This can be achieved a few ways. The best way is to use what is called a "high pass" filter or equalizer setting that will cut out everything BELOW a certain frequency, allowing only the sound above a particular setting to be heard. In this case the setting can vary a lot. Anywhere from 200Hz up to 1kHz. It truly depends how it is sitting in the mix. The numbers I gave you are an OK "rule of thumb" but by no means an end all.As far as the song itself I think it will be SO much more appealing as it is with these changes that the only thing I really feel I need to mention is. The part where you sing "come and get me" about 2:4 according the the crappy myspace player, is a lil bit weird to be so in your face. But I don't think you should change it I think it is a good end to that song. It just needs to be treated a bit to make it more "appealing" and less "strange"I think you should have a CD of Avril Lavigne's "Skater Boy" to listen to when you mix this song. I think it would help you a lot in getting "I don't wanna" mixed in a way that will do this song justice. Now, do not expect to achieve the quality or power level that song has. Just try and get things to mesh in the mix the same way and your song will be a whole lot better and more appealing. Once that is done I might like it better then I like "Heal" and I like that pretty much.On a side note, I miss playing out a lot but not enough to go looking for people at this time. Although, after hearing you and seeing your pic's on myspace. With the way the industry just loves women now a days, I am wishing you and I were local to eachother, with my guitar playing, engineering abilities and your sorta strange but definite sex appeal in your appearance as well as your voice we could have a lot of fun blowing people away. Oh well, back to my crap and good luck.. I truly hope this helps you and you can find people who will compliment your style.EDIT: I thought I would give ya link to one of my latest songs just so ya could hear something from me if you are curious. http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... hgbndsq=1I have a lot more stuff that is in MANY styles. Feel free to check out my other stuff on broadjam. Most of those songs are recorded years ago on crappy home recording gear and I only did em when I was bored. Another song I like of my own is "Give" it's a lot rockier then "Why Daddy Why" but by no means my most rockin' song. lol http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... yhgbndsq=1 That song was recorded on a soundblaster audigy 2 platinum and a Behringer mixer with an electric guitar bought at Bestbuy. I was proving to a friend (after he was complaining about his crappy gear) that you can get good recordings now a days with not so great gear and I think I did a good job at showing it. HAHA

[Pinkstar]

Wow, Give is pretty cool especially the bassline, kicks major butt.I love "Why Daddy Why" the guitarwork, the whole composition, I don't know why but I can imagine Ozzy singing it, lolI'll check the rest of your songs out tomorrow...gotta get some sleep.Very good work! PS: Maybe we should collaborate. After all; these days distance is non-exsisting, thanks to the internet everyone is just a click away.... [don't you steal that line, lol }xoxoxox~JQuote:I really liked "Heal" it has some nice elements to it and the vocal is "attractive". The recording quality is decent (I am listening on a pair of E-mu PM5 studio monitors and Klipsch B-2 Stereo speakers with a sub. A/Bing between the two and it sounds pretty good.) Obviously not recorded/mastered in a top notch studio but good job.Now the rough part... "I Don't Wanna" shows a definite lack of experience in mixing/EQing to sit things into a mix. You have a problem here what us sound engineers use to call "mud in the mix" or it seems "too muddy" This is always more common in faster songs because there is so much more going on. IF I was going over your mix the first thing I would do is drop all FX and start fresh. All the music has too much on it. Your vocals sit nice because they do not have too much compared to the music. Making it easy for them to stand out. Also, this song strikes me more as a song that needs everything to stand up front as much as possible. To add a smash-mouth attack which is obvious in the song but not the recording. You lose a lot of listener effect here.Posting for the moment... be back with more advice for "I Don't Wanna" hopefully before you read this.OK, I listened even more to "I Don't wanna" and I thought a bit about how to explain this to you in a lamens way.The best way to explain to you about how the music sounds compared to the vocal (as stated above about too much FX probably reverb) it sounds like the band is in another room while the singer is performing in front of us, the listeners. The guitar on the right side is very close to good as is. I would back off the reverb on it very little. I would also send the right guitar to a buss with a VERY SHORT tempo sync'd delay and pan the to the left (or just play another guitar part left side panned but the delayed be easier) This will add "drive" to the "smash-mouth" effect I believe this song needs. The drums are just TOO FAR away from the rest of the "band" so to speak, so back off the verb a lot on those. The snare drum almost always will be just under the vocal in mix. So, if you have control over the snare get that to standout a lil more. It may come out enough just from backing off the reverb on the drums but I doubt it. The bass guitar didn't sound fresh and solid enough for this song. Like a lot of the "support" for your vocal is lost in the "other room" I would make sure it is well compressed like vhee mentioned but I would also send the bass to a "buss" with a stereo chorus to liven up the higher frequencies in the bass. This song strikes me as a song that NEEDS the bass solid all the way through it. To get that "In Your Face" effect (smash-mouth). Now, on the Buss with the stereo chorus for the bass it is important that you use an equalizer here. You need to cut out all the low end From the chorus so the deep part of the bass stays solid. This can be achieved a few ways. The best way is to use what is called a "high pass" filter or equalizer setting that will cut out everything BELOW a certain frequency, allowing only the sound above a particular setting to be heard. In this case the setting can vary a lot. Anywhere from 200Hz up to 1kHz. It truly depends how it is sitting in the mix. The numbers I gave you are an OK "rule of thumb" but by no means an end all.As far as the song itself I think it will be SO much more appealing as it is with these changes that the only thing I really feel I need to mention is. The part where you sing "come and get me" about 2:4 according the the crappy myspace player, is a lil bit weird to be so in your face. But I don't think you should change it I think it is a good end to that song. It just needs to be treated a bit to make it more "appealing" and less "strange"I think you should have a CD of Avril Lavigne's "Skater Boy" to listen to when you mix this song. I think it would help you a lot in getting "I don't wanna" mixed in a way that will do this song justice. Now, do not expect to achieve the quality or power level that song has. Just try and get things to mesh in the mix the same way and your song will be a whole lot better and more appealing. Once that is done I might like it better then I like "Heal" and I like that pretty much.On a side note, I miss playing out a lot but not enough to go looking for people at this time. Although, after hearing you and seeing your pic's on myspace. With the way the industry just loves women now a days, I am wishing you and I were local to eachother, with my guitar playing, engineering abilities and your sorta strange but definite sex appeal in your appearance as well as your voice we could have a lot of fun blowing people away. Oh well, back to my crap and good luck.. I truly hope this helps you and you can find people who will compliment your style.EDIT: I thought I would give ya link to one of my latest songs just so ya could hear something from me if you are curious. http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... hgbndsq=1I have a lot more stuff that is in MANY styles. Feel free to check out my other stuff on broadjam. Most of those songs are recorded years ago on crappy home recording gear and I only did em when I was bored. Another song I like of my own is "Give" it's a lot rockier then "Why Daddy Why" but by no means my most rockin' song. lol http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... yhgbndsq=1 That song was recorded on a soundblaster audigy 2 platinum and a Behringer mixer with an electric guitar bought at Bestbuy. I was proving to a friend (after he was complaining about his crappy gear) that you can get good recordings now a days with not so great gear and I think I did a good job at showing it. HAHA

[rick]

I guess I'm confused .I thought we were critiquing the song not the production.They are two completely different things.The song is lyric,melody,and structure.Maybe we need a section for critiquing songs and another for production.What does ever body think about that?

[Casey H]

Hi JVBI listened and enjoyed both songs... No comments here about production and engineering- not my area at all. But, this is one place to get some help there as I assume you want to pitch to film/TV.I Don't Wanna: First, I have to warn you that sometimes I make a suggestion as to where to go with a song that may be at odds with where you see it. I suggested to Aub once that he make a song into a Billy Joel replacement track for film/TV and I think he is still speaking with me. ... I see a lot of requests lately for songs for young female teens or the "tween" set, both for film/TV and artists. So, you could "de-punk" it a bit and change it from "I don't wanna got to WORK today" to "I don't wanna go to SCHOOL today". I couldn't make out all the lyrics but I assume other lyrics would have to change too. It might be a great tween-pop song.Heal: It would be great if you post the lyrics to both songs- I couldn't make this out either (laptop speakers this morning). Myspace even supports uploading lyrics. I thought "Heal" had a nice sound, no killer hook, but with decent production and depending on lyrics, could be a good film/TV track.Have a great day! Casey

[rnrmachine]

Please do not feel ya have to comment on my music jvbod69 (I was tempted to put jvbod68 and say, "ya owe me one!" ROFL). I just put a link there to my music as a gauge for you to take into account, "my advice verses what I have available for you to listen to in what I have done" Ya know, put your money where your mouth is, so to speak. Please do not feel ya have to listen anymore or give opinions, I don't wanna hijack your thread and if I want help with something (which I will in the very near future) I will post for advice here like you did. /hugs and thankyou for listening.In response to Rick, as far as critiquing the production on "I don't wanna" normally I won't or I'll keep it majorly short. Don't worry, if I come accross any of your songs I will not offer up any engineering advice (if I remember not to /giggle, my memory sucks at times). Since you obviously have a problem with it to the point you felt ya needed to take the time to point it out but yet, not give any advice at all which I thought was a bit odd. I put a lot of time into that reply and my time isn't cheap, not like I have it in abundance. Honestly, at first listening I almost felt, that if the song were mine I might scrap it for a better song and MAYBE come back to it someday. But as I listened more open minded I realized this song really has hit potential. It is fast, fun and odd in a good way. So I tossed in my advice to better the song in the best way "I" knew how. If this bothers someone/anyone then I am sorry but we all help in the way we can. I personally don't see anything wrong with me posting engineering advice in "peer to peer". ANY advice is "peer to peer" isn't it? If I think ya suck so bad that ya have to give up and go join Forest Gump on his shrimp boat or I like ya soo much I become your new stalker fan HAHA. (Some days I think I need to go join Forest but he'd probably fire me for eating too much of the catch. LOL)EDIT: I went back and read, "before posting you must read this" Which I read before I posted the first time. I suppose from now on I will "copy" and "paste" like so... (but no one else does so I didn't /shrug)TAXI CUSTOM CRITIQUEStyle_x_ On target for today's market in _band built rock/pop/alt_ genre__ Not current sounding__ Hard to classifyStyle Comments:__Nice style for a modern rock band with a girl lead vocalist___________________________________________________________________________________Melody__ Good music in verses__ Verses could be stronger__ Good music in chorus__ Verses/Chorus sound too similar_x_ Memorable Hook__ Hook not obvious enoughMelody Comments:_This song done well will have a seducing melody___________________________________________________________________________________Structure__ Intro too long_x_ Well-written structure__ Good sectional contrast__ Not enough sectional contrast__ Could use a bridgeStructure Comments:__I like the whole song as is, it is a really fun song_____________________________________________________________________________________Lyric_x_ First line makes me want to hear more_x_ Engaging__ Cohesive__ Good use of imagery_x_ Rhymes well_x_ Communicates emotion to listener__ Lacks focus__ Unique__ Too abstract__ I don't understand it__ Too predictable__ Too many cliches__ Awkward phrasing__ Vocal does not help to sell song_x_ Vocal does help to sell songLyrcial Comments:__I think it is an awesome set of nothing special_____done in a "hit" manner seemingly written to be FUN____________________________________________Title_x_ Good title__ So-So title__ Can't determine title by listening__ Could appear in a more strategic place__ Doesn't repeat enough__ Repeats too oftenTitle Comments:__Works great_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________OVERALL COMMENTS__See my original post_________________________________________________________________________________________________________Now give a rating 1 to 10, 1 being the worst, 10 being the best:_9_ Music_9_ Lyrics_10_ Marketability_9_ Arrangement_7_ Production_3_ EngineeringNOW. Would you walk this into a label credibility on this music? color]_x_ YES (ONLY if the band had more songs like it AND was under the complete undertsnading it would be re-recorded_x_ NO (If the song is "as is" then it is not ready to market, not at "broadcast" qualityHey Rick.. see the "production/engineering" ?? I guess ya were confused. No worries happens to me alot. hehe (so it is obviously at the reviewers discretion if he wants to elaborate on those or just be a terd and give a crap score with no advice as to how to raise the score other then the well known which is, "Cough up the dough for a pro studio") I think there is a rap/rock ala the red hot chili peppers song in there... get the beat in your head, bump bah bat-a-lat SnAp bump, bump bah bAt-a-lat sNaP bump, now sing "Cough up the dough for a pro studio"... bump bah bat-a-lat SnAp bump, bump bah bAt-a-lat sNaP bump.BTW, I love a lot of bands that have this sort of "us only sound" The band Garbage, No doubt, Veruca Salt etc... are obvious choices imo to mention here. I am a sucker for chicks with a rock band and a chip on their shoulder (gotta luv spicy dishes... just gotta luv em!! hehe)EDIT: OH DAG!!, I checked out your band... you guys are looking for a guitarist eh? What part of the country you located in?

[rick]

I ceartainly was not trying to be nasty or sarcastic,I posed my post as a question,and was not telling anyone how to critique.I found it odd that only production was being critiqued.You can have the greatest produced demo on the planet but if the song isn't great it's all for nothing.