Slip and Slide - Would like your input

[aubreyz]

I submitted the following song to a listing, more for the critique than really expecting it to be forwarded. I would also appreciate the input of those who post here. After a long hiatus, I am back to pursuing my own music. I was doing new wave in the 80's, a kind of grunge/funk in the 90's, and am still experimenting with what "sound" works for me now artistically. I know I still have a lot of work to do, but this track is getting closer to what "feels" right to me. Your comments are very valuable in that process. I'm not looking for a pat on the back, (though they are always appreciated), but rather any helpful critiques. If you think it sucks, then I'd like to hear that and why. I would also greatly appreciate knowing what you possibly like about it and and why.Here's the link. Thanks again.Slip and SlideAub

[gitarrero]

Hi,just listening - here's my critique:- the drums sound very "midi", they don't groove- the structure is quite confusing, I guess that could be fixed by cleaning out the arrangement. Often too many instruments are playing diffrent things, it doesn't really "fit" together.- the vocals are quite "opera" - it's a question of taste, some will like it, some won'tHope that helps.

[aubreyz]

Quote:Hi,just listening - here's my critique:- the drums sound very "midi", they don't groove- the structure is quite confusing, I guess that could be fixed by cleaning out the arrangement. Often too many instruments are playing diffrent things, it doesn't really "fit" together.- the vocals are quite "opera" - it's a question of taste, some will like it, some won'tHope that helps.Thanks for the input. Helps a lot.The drums ARE too rigid. This is really just a demo. I plan to either recut with live musicians or take the time to add some depth and groove through programming, simplifying and sonic enhancements. Structure points I agree with as well. It's too cluttered as is. I tend to throw everything at the wall and see what sticks. There are several parts that are fighting for attention and that helps kill the groove too.Opera... well... been there done that. Those years of classical training and performance in college sometimes haunt me At some level, my voice is what it is. Some like, some don't. As far as my likes, I'm still playing with the balance from the heavier stuff I was singing over a decade ago, to a more up to date commercial sound.All just steps along the way. Still a long way to reach some personal goals, but at least I'm further along today than I was yesterday.Thanks again for taking time to listen and comment.

[edteja]

Your poor goldfish! This could be really good. It strikes me as rather flat, perhaps for the reasons you've already discussed. To my ears, the guitar lead is a classic distorted lead sound with nothing interesting happening. But I like the song, and the lyric. Please keep on with this one. Out of curiosity, what genre do you consider this fitting in -- Rock?

[aubreyz]

Quote:Your poor goldfish! This could be really good. It strikes me as rather flat, perhaps for the reasons you've already discussed. To my ears, the guitar lead is a classic distorted lead sound with nothing interesting happening. But I like the song, and the lyric. Please keep on with this one. Out of curiosity, what genre do you consider this fitting in -- Rock?Thanks for your comments.Good question. I think it probably needs a harder alternative rock edge to really fit a rock genre. Right now it's kind of flailing about like a fish out of water. A little too pop to be rock and a little too rock to be pop. It just got rejected on the first submission, but I somewhat expected that --- the critique was very helpful. I'll post about it elsewhere.I'm happy that at least someone picked up on the goldfish line It's one of my favorite tongue inserted firmly in cheek lyrics.Aub

[nutunes]

Hi AubThis sounds like something I would have knocked up a while back. i.e. chuck a load of different bits in (sounds/licks) & see what fits. To be honest, I can't quite find something (melody wise) in the song that "floats my boat"Writing a catchy melody comes quite easy for me but I struggle with lyrics. Are you up for some collaboration on a new song?If so, drop me a mail: toptensNO@SPAMmsn.com (remove spam trap)Kind regardsPhil

[rockmann]

Hey Aubrey,Looks like this song has taken on a new look since I last heard it. It's certainly still growing and getting better with each version.As you've already stated, it will certainly have a better over all feel when performed by 'live' musicians. Less robotic.I like this song, but I like Freeze Me better.