Song concept... Just a verse and chorus but...

[Mark Kaufman]

Posting early, to me, is the only way to seriously USE people's advice on a song. If you finish something and post it, you either have to be willing to chuck it and start the whole thing all over again, or just acknowledge the feedback and move on to the next one...which is what seems to happen most often.

But I highly recommend keeping the idea and the music you have to this point, along with a willingness to utterly destroy any of the wordings--it's that ruthlessness with ideas that leads to the best possible lyric. Kill your darlings! Can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs...

[Len911]

Oh, she did leave,lol! Stuart was right!

I was thinking the reason he didn't share was because when he came home there was chaos, everyone hurrying about getting ready for sports practice, games, cooking supper, errands, and the general lack of time and busyness that "suburban moms" encounter.
Well in that case I'd have to agree with Stuart, if there isn't a reason for the mundane, it all seems rather pointless.

[Casey H]

Yea... time to get out the hatchet and kill some darlings.

Casey

[Mark Kaufman]

But save the song!!

Notes and words...they all get beaten into something or other, it's all just clay to be smushed into shape...but the idea is still sitting there waiting for you! Save it, Casey, save it!

[cardell]

But save the song!!

Notes and words...they all get beaten into something or other, it's all just clay to be smushed into shape...but the idea is still sitting there waiting for you! Save it, Casey, save it!

Yes, I agree! I enjoyed the overall vibe of the track.

Stuart

[Mark Kaufman]

... Kill your darlings! ...

Ooh Mark. Thanks for the song theme. I like that. Is that wrong?

It's not wrong, but beware--it's pretty overused already...I think either Hemingway or Faulkner first said it, and if you Google it, you'll see everything from movies to magazines with that hook for a title...

[Casey H]

... Kill your darlings! ...

Ooh Mark. Thanks for the song theme. I like that. Is that wrong?

It's not wrong, but beware--it's pretty overused already...I think either Hemingway or Faulkner first said it, and if you Google it, you'll see everything from movies to magazines with that hook for a title...

I think Charles Manson may have used it...

[Casey H]

I removed this... Put up a new version in P2P...

Casey

[shellsings]

yes perhaps more in the verses that relate to a long day.

something about minutes or hours perhaps.

[Casey H]

yes perhaps more in the verses that relate to a long day.

something about minutes or hours perhaps.

I agree... Thanks!