Please Review My Original Songs! =)

[patmusic77]

Hi everyone!

I'm new to these forums and taxi. I just joined about 2 weeks ago and I love it already!

I would greatly appreciate it if any of you guys would please listen to and give your opinions/reviews on my original songs.

Do you love them/hate them? Let me know!

Please keep in mind though that these are rough demos that I made in my bedroom with only my vocals and guitar/piano so please don't judge them on the production, but the songs themselves.

Thanks so much in advance. My taxi page is the following with all my songs on it:

http://www.taxi.com/patricksporrer

Thanks again! =)

[RogerG]

Hi,

First, welcome to Taxi! Also please understand when people respond up here to your songs etc., it is personal opinion which is always subjective. That includes me of course.

Usually we do one song at a time up here and prefer the lyrics posted, but I listened to about 3-4 of yours and got the general idea. Here are my best pieces of advice:

1. Learn the commercial formats of today's music. If I say a song goes ABABCBB, you should know what the heck it is I'm talking about.

2. Be careful with your lyrics. Try not to waste ideas or rhymes. In other words, you had one line of I'm drowning in water. Ok you're drowning but that could be way more interesting. Drowning in life, alcohol, tic-tacs (ok, this one probably not ), blood, etc. As a listener then I want to know more which sets you up much better for the rest of the song. Way more interesting. As for not wasting rhymes, basically what I mean is not rhyming things like the and of. Yes they rhyme but the most powerful words in your song are typically the rhyming ones. Like home and robe for example. I'm setting things up here. Also notice I didn't use alone? Because that's a cliche. Cliches work (which is why they're cliches) but the listener isn't as curious as they've heard it a zillion times before.

3. Get your hands on or buy Robin Fredrick's book(s) as she covers the above and a whole lot more (I'm recommending her book because it helped me quite a bit, there's no ulterior motive in recommending it to you). Here's a link:

http://www.amazon.com/Shortcuts-Hit-Son ... 159&sr=1-3

4. And realize Taxi is a learning experience as much as anything else (I can certainly say I personally had a lot to learn right after signing up, I'm still learning and always will be). If you get something returned to you, after the initial shock/disappointment wears off, go back and try to learn from it. You can do that by posting, getting a custom critique, looking at the tracks that were forwarded (though unfortunately not all forwards get posted), etc.

Hope that helps! - Roger

[patmusic77]

Hi Roger,

Thanks so much for taking the time to listen to and review my songs!

I really appreciate it and all the helpful advice you gave me.

I will definitely take it to heart. =)

Will be seeing you around the forums!

[nylyrics]

I really enjoyed your efforts. It sounded like you are determined. And if you truly are continue writing and recording- at the same time you are learning, new info on the craft and picking up on the teacher that is hit songs on the charts, and maybe it will all come together.
Great start.
Check out Songwork.com and Gary ewer blogs
A-

[patmusic77]

Hi nylyrics,

Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement! I really appreciate it!

And I don't ever plan to give up songwriting even if everyone in the whole world thought I was terrible at it cause I love it so much. I just love the feeling you get when writing a song, it's indescribable, ha ha.

Again, thank you and I would love to hear anyone's opinions on my music, even if you think I really suck, ha ha. Just let me know.

[Kolstad]

Hi Patrick,

I heard short sections from all of them, and think you have a great voice and style. Great lyric ideas, that will suit the contemporary rock genre pretty good, I think. Acts like John Mayer, Coldplay, The Killers came to mind while listening to you.

You shouldn't sell yourself short just because you are starting out. No one gives a s*** about experience these days. That's old pops talk. All that matters is that you have music that will work in a recognizeable genre, that you can get it produced to broadcast quality, and that you can get it to people who needs exactly that.

Work on finishing those songs, while writing new ones. Educate yourself in songwriting, music business and music production. Listen to the bands you love, and cop the way they arrange their music for your own songs. It's not rocket science. Many in here have learned how to go from lyrics to full production in a day.

So get into the record, submit, forget, game. The faster, the better (NO experience required!)
Like Cale and Clapton sings "You'll be big.. if you don't quit", and honestly, from where you are now, that's the truth!

[patmusic77]

Hi thesongcabinet,

Wow! Thank you so much for the very kind words! I truly do appreciate any and all kindness and encouragement. =)

Also, I plan on re-recording all the songs I have uploaded. I just ordered a presonus recording bundle and it has the first daw that I will ever use with it. I'm so excited to semi-professionally record my songs and add violins and piano and drums over the basic guitar and vocals and make everything sound much higher quality, too. I can't wait, ha ha. =)

But thank you so much and I have to comment on other people's music here cause you're all helping me out tons.

[feaker66]

Hi pat. Nice to meet you.

I am over three times your age. Ha ha

Liked "falling to nothing" the best. I can hear the Taylor Swift influence there.

Your stuff is kinda ruff now but has great potential. Your mic seems a little overdriven?? (back off) ha ha

Love hearing music that is not all processed.

Your voice is pretty good and you only have a few pitchy spots.

Really concentrate on production issues. There is so muchinfo to be learned here in the forum.

sincerely

Paul

[patmusic77]

Hi Paul,

Thanks so much for the feedback and tips. I do tend to sing right against the mic so I'll back up more, lol.

And I just got my first daw today so i'll hopefully be learning a ton more about production very soon, haha.

Thanks again!

[laurise0626]

Patrick,
I think you have a unique voice and style that is quite marketable:) As a fellow singer/songwriter, the main piece of advice I would give you is to work on your vocal phrasing a little bit so that your voice and instrument match up a little more. There were times when I felt like your tempo was a little bit all over the place. I personally feel like that's something I've had to work really hard at. I really admire your passion though and that will take you a long way.

Best of luck,
Jenna Laurise