Need feedback-TRIP-HOP INSTRUMENTALS

[henryvan4444]

Hi guys,
I'm thinking of submitting this song for the TAXI #Y190827TR. Any feedback is greatly appreciated! - Henry

https://soundcloud.com/henryvan4444/strange-dreams


++++original request++++
TRIP-HOP INSTRUMENTALS are needed by a very successful Christian Production Company that’s working on multiple Independent Films! This company has just started requesting music from TAXI's members, so this is a great opportunity to get on this person's radar for these films and future projects as well.
Please listen to the following references to get an idea of what could work for this pitch:
“Teardrop” by Massive Attack
"Heaven's Gonna Burn Your Eyes" by Thievery Corporation
"Sour Times" by Portishead
"Overcome" by Tricky
Although the references have vocals, this request is for Instrumentals only.
Please submit full-length Trip-Hop Instrumentals (not Cues) that use atmospheric sounds and slowed Hip-Hop beats to create a laid back mood and vibe. Your submissions should have creative instrumentation and engaging rhythms from beginning to end.
All submissions should be about 2:00 to 4:00 minutes long, give or take. Non-Faded endings will work best. Do not copy the references in any way, shape, or form. Use them only as a general guide for overall feel, texture, and tone. Broadcast quality is needed.
Based on similar requests from other clients, we're guesstimating the sync fee range to be somewhere between $150 - $250, depending on the ultimate placements. The deal points will ultimately be handled on a case-by-case basis between you and the Client. You must own or control your Master and Copyright to submit to this opportunity. Please submit as many Songs as you’d like, online or per CD. All submissions will be screened on a Yes/No basis – Short critiques only. Submissions must be received no later than 11:59 PM (PDT) on Tuesday, August 27th, 2019.  TAXI #Y190827TR

[arska]

This reminds me of the soundtrack from the movie series of Ocean's Eleven etc. I think this track is marvelous in its own genre but at least I can't recognize it as trip hop track. I'd except some sort of laidback drum loop as well.

But I'm not fully in that trip hop genre so someone wiser can comment

[andygabrys]

My opinion:

This is closer to classic trip-hop than to the more funky organic Oceans 11 / David Holmes style.

Its worth a pitch. Hopefully you will get some critique that helps you fine tune if its not a forward.

[henryvan4444]

I truly appreciate the feedback. I'm new to this genre so what you all say makes good sense to me. I'll probably pitch it just to get some feedback if it doesn't forward. You don't learn if you don't try right? Thx again everyone!

[Donnalyn]

Hi Henry,

Really nice! The only part I found a bit awkward was the first few seconds. There is a syncopation that, to me, doesn't sound quite intentional. But that is just a minor quibble. On the whole, I think its very engaging!

[cosmicdolphin]

I thought sonically it sounded about right but it was faster than the reference tracks so they feel a bit more laid back to me.

Mark

[henryvan4444]

Well... if anyone was curious this one got forwarded. Thanks for everyone's input! Best of luck to everyone!