can I have your critique before I submit?

[Steverino]

Hi,

I'm pretty new to the forum, even though I've been a Taxi member for a while. I've gotten a little frustrated recently, having had my last four submissions returned. My next submission is for the listing below. Could you please be painfully honest with me and let me know if I need ANY type of rewrite,/remix/redo. Thanks for your help!

Sincerely,
Stephen

Lots of BLUESY, BIKER ROCK INSTRUMENTAL CUES are needed by an extremely busy Music Library with a tremendously long list of killer placements in Hit TV Shows!
They’re on the hunt for a bunch of Mid-To-Up-Tempo Instrumental Cues that are in the general stylistic ballpark of these references:

Here's my cue called Wild Stallion... https://soundcloud.com/daytona80/wild-stallion-2

[crashgates]

pretty dame good if you ask me : )

yeah! I can feel it on my tricycle and see it in the next low rider film

send it in (what are you waiting for, its only 5 dollars down as worse case scenario)

Legal Disclaimer: ( I know nothing about anything : ( so take this comment/suggestions at your own risk and consult with your local paid professional )

[cassmcentee]

I think this would pass if the mix were better...
At 0:12 when the lead comes in the drums feel 50 yards away
The drums have to feel stronger

[funsongs]

I think this would pass if the mix were better...
At 0:12 when the lead comes in the drums feel 50 yards away
The drums have to feel stronger

Hello, Stephen...
Yep - agreeing.
Drums up closer, centered with kick/bass locked.
Would like to hear an improved mix... good/cool/catchy/rockin tune.
Worth 'fixing'.

[Zaychi]

Cool tune. I'd mix the organ further to the back in favor of the guitar, especially after 01:00

[cosmicdolphin]

The guitar riff is decent but it's way too repetitive, like you came up with one riff and just copy / pasted it across the entire track almost.

As other have said the mix is not cutting it, the drums have no presence and to my ears the organ as lead just makes it sound way too cheesy. I'd have expected lead guitar and some organ in the background .

Mark