Opinions Please! This is for a Public Domain Trailer

[Stubee]

Superblonde, that was great advise. I added the flute and it made a huge difference. I also ran both vocal tracks thru autotune.
I'm not sure if the mix is right yet. Do you think the recording is better? any other suggestions?

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

I might give the vocal another attempt. Maybe I'll try to soften up the vocal.

Thank you,
Stu

[superblonde]

Wow I agree, so much better.
The gong or Cymbal though is much too loud when it comes in. The organ pads too towards the end. They overwhelm everything. Pull them down and keep the focus on the vocal. Maybe play with any reverb which is on them to reduce the amount of wet, so they seem more punchy or less drowed out when they hit.

Maybe the one note which needs adjusting is where the vocal hits the M7th. Try doing that with a grace note feel which quickly resolves downward: Melisma.

I dont know if it fits the listing, but it's got a good funeral dirge vibe now. Maybe the very end could use subtle 'marching bells' .

[Stubee]

Wow I agree, so much better.
The gong or Cymbal though is much too loud when it comes in. The organ pads too towards the end. They overwhelm everything. Pull them down and keep the focus on the vocal. Maybe play with any reverb which is on them to reduce the amount of wet, so they seem more punchy or less drowed out when they hit.

Maybe the one note which needs adjusting is where the vocal hits the M7th. Try doing that with a grace note feel which quickly resolves downward: Melisma.

I dont know if it fits the listing, but it's got a good funeral dirge vibe now. Maybe the very end could use subtle 'marching bells' .

Also great advice. I still have a couple of more days left until the listing closes. I'll bring the gong and organ down. There is some tape delay on them that I can also lower.
I'm still not happy with the vocal in the first half. I might try another take o that too.

Thank you Superblonde!!

-Stu

[Stubee]

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

Here is the latest edition. I lowered the volume on the gong and added bells at the end. I also added a military type snare drum in the
last chorus. I also replaced the lead and harmony vocal. I'm having a hard time deciding if the mix is final or not.

-Stu

[swdaze]

Superblonde, that was great advise. I added the flute and it made a huge difference. I also ran both vocal tracks thru autotune.
I'm not sure if the mix is right yet. Do you think the recording is better? any other suggestions?

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

I might give the vocal another attempt. Maybe I'll try to soften up the vocal.

Thank you,
Stu

Hey Stu listened to the original and the flute version nice work a really cool reimagining. I like the idea of a softer vocal maybe even a slight tempo reduction? I can imagine this being used in a funeral scene or the wrap up of a tragic show/movie. Maybe creep up the tom hits in the last minute or so and layer in more vocals? The melody is already stuck in my head....

Good stuff!! Geo

[Stubee]

Superblonde, that was great advise. I added the flute and it made a huge difference. I also ran both vocal tracks thru autotune.
I'm not sure if the mix is right yet. Do you think the recording is better? any other suggestions?

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

I might give the vocal another attempt. Maybe I'll try to soften up the vocal.

Thank you,
Stu

Hey Stu listened to the original and the flute version nice work a really cool reimagining. I like the idea of a softer vocal maybe even a slight tempo reduction? I can imagine this being used in a funeral scene or the wrap up of a tragic show/movie. Maybe creep up the tom hits in the last minute or so and layer in more vocals? The melody is already stuck in my head....

Good stuff!! Geo

Thank you Geo! These are great suggestions. The listing closes on Monday so I have until then to try to get it right.

[irthlingz]

I too can imagine this being used for sync in the right scene. The minor key works gangbusters for me, and the pain in the vocal contrasting with the lyrics. Love that.

For this listing, it doesn't start to get the "epic, larger-than-life vibe" till around 2:05. Even before that, it doesn't really sound "Orchestral or Orchestral Hybrid" to my ear. Basically, it feels like a synth and vocal with some nice decorations.

JM2C

===
Michael

[Stubee]

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

I went ahead and reworked the vocals and took down the gong and basses a bit. After that I ran it through the Soundcloud mastering for $5
and accentuated the low end. I know that the listing calls for and epic sound but the sample gets there in the lasts 3rd of the Star Spangled Banner
so I held back on going there too until about the 2:05 mark. I did, however, put in a teaser at the 1 minute mark but then brought it back down
until the 2:05 mark.


Thank you everyone for all of your suggestions and advice. I think that this forum is one of the best things about Taxi.

-Stu

[Stubee]

https://www.taxi.com/members/V2G7ZzSiTs ... de-of-life

I went ahead and reworked the vocals and took down the gong and basses a bit. After that I ran it through the Soundcloud mastering for $5
and accentuated the low end. I know that the listing calls for and epic sound but the sample gets there in the lasts 3rd of the Star Spangled Banner
so I held back on going there too until about the 2:05 mark. I did, however, put in a teaser at the 1 minute mark but then brought it back down
until the 2:05 mark.


Thank you everyone for all of your suggestions and advice. I think that this forum is one of the best things about Taxi.

-Stu

Hey Stu

I really like this, but I think the production is not quite there yet. The panning at the start does not work for me, with the piano hard left - it feels very unusual and unbalanced throughout the piece. The voice is a little too far away for me. In the last third, the (kind of abrasive) organ sound also feels coming from the left. The snare towards the end - not sure it is the right choice (I think it could be when processed/mixed the right way), but it also goes under in the mix. Altogether, the mix would have to be clearer. Not sure what you use for VIs and plugins, but this may be more about mixing and handling them than the sample quality.

This was a shot from the hip in terms of a review, but you seem to feel yourself that it is not really there yet. Keep working at it! It's a good idea and the foundation has been laid.

Tom

Thank you Tom. I used mostly in the box Logic Pro plugins. The snare drum is from Steven Slate. I tried to lower the organ but maybe not enough.
Thank you for your feedback! Much appreciated. I attempted to make some changes based on your suggestions. The same link has the updated version.

-Stu