Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

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jesseh
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Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

Post by jesseh » Fri Mar 10, 2023 12:05 pm

Hi,

I just got feedback from screener #452 that maybe I should use a different piano that blends better. Not sure I understand that. My intention of the post isn't really about the screener but I saw a similar post by tpwmusic about a similar comment from the same screener so maybe there is something there... I don't know.
tpwmusics post:
have-i-upset-screener-452-t150026.html

What I really want is not to roast a screener but to get better at making music. So here is the listing:
https://www.taxi.com/listings/D230308EZ

Here is my submission:
https://www.taxi.com/members/DDV6KfCbSl ... sunflowers

Here is the feedback:
https://www.taxi.com/my/submissions/20369583/critique

So piano tone an issue? I get what the screener says about the ending anticipation/resolve - good feedback. But I am curious about the comment on the tremolo guitar needing to blend more. First off, it is a mandolin, heh heh. But, to the point, is this section possibly too distracting for a sync piece - is it too attention getting to work for dialog - is that possibly what the screener was getting at?

I'm just getting started writing for listings so appreciate any feedback you might have on the piece beyond the screener comments.

Thanks!
- Jesse Hose
Music is the reason.

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funsongs
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Re: Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

Post by funsongs » Fri Mar 10, 2023 12:43 pm

Although I am properly 'logged-in', the feedback critique link doesn't work for me. It leads back to the main TAXI website front page (maybe it's for MEMBERS ONLY?)

My 2 cents on the track (unsolicited as it may be) -
The composition SOUNDS LIKE a sorta of nice Waltzy-paced, piece (I like the piano tone)...
but the nylon guitar part is such that it sounds too digital and stiff - like a march - and not gentle & relaxed - to complement the nice melody.

As a mandolin-player, too - I'm aware that it can 'stick out' in a mix -
thus probably draws too much attention to be good for underscore, or under dialog.

Hope you get the answers you're looking for, to make the track work more smoothly appealing - ready to get the FORWARD.
HTH.
Cheers.
Peter Rahill - aka "funsongs"
NOW, back on YouTube (2022)
https://www.youtube.com/@peterrahill9263/featured
https://soundcloud.com/funsongs-1
https://peterrahill.bandcamp.com/

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Telefunkin
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Re: Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

Post by Telefunkin » Sat Mar 11, 2023 2:24 am

Just to add to earlier comments, the link to the listing takes me to the page containing ALL listing. Its always better to paste the listing into your post (including proper links to the ref tracks) making it easier for others to help. The link to feedback doesn't work, so maybe cut/paste from that too. So with no listing, no refs and no feedback 8-) I'll simply say what I hear.

I like the composition and the piano is played very nicely. To me it sounds like you recorded the piano from a distance, giving a slightly dark tone with lots of 'room' sound. The acoustic guitar (as mentioned) sounds very stiff and also closer, then the mandolin is the brightest and most forward sound. If it was my track I would try to get a more relaxed guitar performance, then tweak the tones and reverbs so that the instruments sound more like they're in the same space playing together, but maybe let the piano keep the main focus. I'll be interested to see what others say though.
Graham (UK). Still composing a little faster than decomposing.

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Re: Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

Post by cosmicdolphin » Sat Mar 11, 2023 6:51 am

Without being able to read the Listing and Feedback as the links don't work I would say it all feels a bit too far forward/in-your-face/unnsublte. Try playing everything more gently and emotionally , set them back more into the soundscape so we don't feel like we have our ears right up against the instruments,

Mark

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Re: Screener #452 doesn't like pianos? OR mandolin too distracting for sync?

Post by jesseh » Thu Mar 23, 2023 10:11 am

Thank you for the feedback telefunkin and cosmicdolphin. Thanks for the tip on copy/pasting feedback and listings, I will do that going forward. I hear what you are saying about the stiff guitar and things being too forward. I will re-work the piece. Your feedback is appreciated!
- Jesse Hose
Music is the reason.

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