UPDATED-Requesting Feedback for 80's rock ballad production

[BradleyHagen]

Hello Everyone!
We are working to get two tracks submitted for the following listing, and here is #1:

'80s-Style POWER BALLAD/ROCK SONGS with Male or Female Vocals are needed for an (up to) $1,000, Direct-to-Film Producer placement in an upcoming Independent Feature Film with an Award Winning Indie Film Director!

Important Note: You'll get 100% of the sync fee, and keep 100% of your publishing and master rights. No publishing splits!

This Film's Producer is on the hunt for Mid-Tempo Songs that could work as a replacement for "Alone" by Heart, which is currently temped in:

"Alone" by Heart

They're NOT looking for clones or soundalikes! Similar tempo, style, and overall vibe? Yes. Clones? No!

QUOTING THE PRODUCER: "We need something epic that sounds like it would be playing in a bar."

Tempo Matters: Because the scene is already edited, matching (or being close to) the tempo of the reference is strongly recommended.

Please submit rockin' Power Ballads with an iconic, '80s sound and powerful, soaring choruses full of emotion! Memorable melodies, solid arrangements, '80s-inspired rhythms, well-performed vocals, and lots of emotional intensity are all needed for this request. Rock instrumentation in the general stylistic wheelhouse of the reference will suit your submissions best (think keys, guitars, bass, '80s-inspired drums, etc.). Please ensure any virtual instruments or samples you use are high-quality and era-appropriate. Vintage and Modern recordings are both fair game! Powerful vocal performances full of confidence could help you seal the deal!

Lyrics that avoid references to specific names, dates, times, places, brands, and profanity could make your Songs easier to place. Please do NOT copy the referenced artist or song in any way, shape, or form. Use it as a general guide for tempo, tone, and overall vibe. Do NOT submit any material with unauthorized samples of any other artists’ music, sounds, or any other form of media. Broadcast Quality is needed.

The license fee for this placement is (up to) $1,000, depending on the ultimate use. This is a Direct-to-Film Producer placement, so you’ll keep 100% ownership of your Copyright and Master Recordings, plus you’ll also get 100% of the License Fee and any applicable performance royalties. You must own or control your Copyright and Master Recordings to pitch for this opportunity. Please submit as many Songs as you’d like, online or per CD. All submissions will be screened and critiqued by TAXI. Submissions must be received no later than 11:59 PM (PDT) on Saturday, April 27th, 2024. TAXI # S240427EN

Now, I really don't have time to make any drastic structural changes to this track at this late date, so I am asking for mix/production feedback above all else. All feedback and comments are welcomed and appreciated as always, but here are a couple of things I have noticed, and am curious to hear the thoughts of others:
1.) Vocals are masked in spots...
2.) Is kick drum too massive?
3.) How is the piano? (It is Arturia Piano V3) Does the DX7 underneath make it sound muddy?
4.) Are the strings palatable in this instance? Ot do they sound as fake as I think they are?
5.) Does it just suck overall in general, and should I focus on my day job? lol

Here is the track: https://www.taxi.com/members/DVGQpc37Tk ... y-stevens-

Thanks in advance!

[WSAO]

Great job, mate.
Beautiful song.
The only thing that sound a bit stronger is the drums, maybe less metal and more rock ballad would help, but this only drummers (like me) will notice
I don't think the screener will say something about it.
Ah, cut the guitar noise in the end

I'm doing one for this list as well, but not sure if I'll finish before the deadline
Cheers!

Andre

[BradleyHagen]

Thank you as always for the feedback bro! Yeah I will fix the ending.... Question is though....since you are a drummer...
More reverb on the drums?....more gated snare?? I am a former hair metal dude from way back, but I have kind of forgotten those productions methods for the most part! I guess that I have ingested too many copious substances...including Aquanet over the decades!! lol

P.S. I hope you submit and wish you all the best as always!

[WSAO]

I'm from that era as well

I think it's more about the way the drums was programmed and the general sound.
if you look in the reference, the drums sounds basically electronic, with that 80's traditional bright snare.
In your song the drums sounds more the rock ballads from the early 90s, ala Aerosmith, VH, Bon Jovi with all the open cymbals and crashes, but the melody still fits the 80s with the piano and harmony, so I don't think the screener will pick this details up.
Hopefully he's not a pain in the ass drummer!
Great song!

[BradleyHagen]

I'm from that era as well

I think it's more about the way the drums was programmed and the general sound.
if you look in the reference, the drums sounds basically electronic, with that 80's traditional bright snare.
In your song the drums sounds more the rock ballads from the early 90s, ala Aerosmith, VH, Bon Jovi with all the open cymbals and crashes, but the melody still fits the 80s with the piano and harmony, so I don't think the screener will pick this details up.
Hopefully he's not a pain in the ass drummer!
Great song!

Got it!!! I appreciate your taking the time, and best of luck to you all as well on this listing!

[deantaylor]

Excellent song! It feels like an 80's radio rock ballad to me. I think you are definitely in the running for a forward.

Vocal might be a bit masked in places. See if you can get it to cut thru a little better everywhere.

[BradleyHagen]

Thanks Dean! I will work on that for sure...probably more of an automation thing than an EQ thing....

[Telefunkin]

I like it! I think you did a great job, and the lead vocal is MUCH better in this version.
I have a few suggestions but nothing major....
- 34-47s (and 1:56-2:09s) maybe ease back on the auto-tune harmony so it sounds less vocoder-ish (is that a word? )
- perhaps try and tighten the lead/harmony timing into the hook line at 1:22, and make that vocal hook really stand out clear before the guitar solo comes in (very nice solo)
- maybe 2:21 tighten up the vocal sync on 'will'
- I think the vocals are just starting to get lost a hint in that very last section just before the high part comes in
- Again, the final repeat of the hook at 3:32 could be clearer and stand out more (its the most important one of all if you'll be making a 'sting' version for a publisher)
- I'm wondering whether you can make more of that big snare hit at 2:58 somehow (I suppose I'm thinking along the lines of the snare hit just ahead of the chorus on Livin On A Prayer).
- Lastly, do you think it would help to ease back on the guitars (perhaps only in the mid whilst leaving the sides) and bass just a touch, so there's a tiny bit more space for the vocals and the drums? We're into highly subjective territory, but it could be worth another check against the ref track to see whether that makes sense.

Anyway, they're all just suggestions to try and 'milk' the most from the great work you've already done so I hope there's something in there that helps, but forget it all if not. Best of luck with the submission.

[BradleyHagen]

Thank you so much Graham! These are great points..ALL of them!

[BradleyHagen]

Thank You ALL! Especially Graham!!! for your input on this one.... I ended up writing 3 brand new tracks for this brief, as well as submitting 3 pre-existing ones (I know.....longshots for sure!) So wish me luck!

P.S. I am constipated from too much butt cheese 80's ballads!!!! ...... Time for some Metamucil!