Tuesdays With Maury

[couchgrouch]

Tuesdays With MauryWell Ted's old swamprat wife, hated livin' her lifewith a rodeo Okiestole the buckle he'd won, ran off with some bumto the OkefenokeeTed started watchin' trash tvto heal his achin' heartone gal thought she'd gained weightfrom deep-fried Snickers barsshe thought, "what on earth" when she gave birthin a boardwalk bumper caryeah, he gets one day off a weekand watchin' misfits and freakstells him he's not uniquewe've all got a crazy storyit must be good for your mindGary Coleman was on last timepluggin' his psychic hotlinethere's never a slow newsdayon Tuesdays with Mauryhe saw the poor fool who, regretted sayin' "I do"in an all night chapelbusted outta there fast, when sun through stained glassshined on her Adam's applethe redneck who found coon furin his box of Totalnow he's plannin' to takehis recipe globalthe guy who did the splits on a stack of bricksand learned how to yodelyeah, he gets one day off a weekand watchin' misfits and freakstells him he's not uniquewe've all got a crazy storyit must be good for your mindGary Coleman was on last timepluggin' his psychic hotlinethere's never a slow newsdayon Tuesdays with Maurywell Ted cried till he smiledchoked on his Chocadilesome hunter down southdug a prize buckle outof a dead crocodileyeah, everybody's got a crazy storyso he's there for Tuesdays with MauryTuesdays with Maury(c)2005 Robert George