A listen and a look at these lyrics please?
Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2020 8:42 am
Hi Taxi Friends.
I've got a bit of a conundrum. I've had this song returned twice and each time I've gotten different advice. These we're for folk/modern folk singer songwriter listings.
Review 1) "I would consider reworking the lyric in the first verse a bit. Right now it seems as though the singer is already home, so saying "coming home" in the chorus feels a little off."
Review 2 different screener) "Verse 2 is certainly imagery laden, but a tad specific for licensing. Could hear you coming up with an alt verse (for licensing) to avoid potential onscreen conflicts."
So I may do a rewrite of verse 2 but I'm a bit confused. The first review didn't mention verse 2 being an issue. But the second review didn't have a problem with verse 1...They both did say it was a strong contender for licensing with the mentioned changes.
I wrote the song from the viewpoint of a guy sitting on the steps of his old family home after attending a funeral of a loved one. The singer is talking about "the act" of coming home. He's realizing that it's not as bad as he thought it would be. Does that make sense to anyone else? Here's a link to the song. Thanks in advance, John
https://soundcloud.com/jp-pearson-1/com ... x2EHLXqGT1
NEW Revised with V1 and V2 swapped- https://soundcloud.com/jp-pearson-1/com ... 95LhbQsaXO
Coming Home
I’ve got a feeling I’m not going anywhere gonna sit awhile here on these stairs
And let the weathered memories come washing over me
This place I swore I’d never stay but now can’t bear to leave
Coming home, coming home
It’s funny how you miss the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Crooked street signs names like Church and Main faded blacktop sidewalks cracks don’t change
The baseball field where I stole home head-first and broke my wrist
The trees behind the playground where I tasted my first kiss
Coming home, coming home
It’s funny how you miss the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Tears and triumphs loves and losses never go away
They patiently sit waiting for a chance to have their say, a day just like today
Coming home, coming home, coming home, coming home
It’s funny when you fit the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Words & Music ©2020 John L Pearson
I've got a bit of a conundrum. I've had this song returned twice and each time I've gotten different advice. These we're for folk/modern folk singer songwriter listings.
Review 1) "I would consider reworking the lyric in the first verse a bit. Right now it seems as though the singer is already home, so saying "coming home" in the chorus feels a little off."
Review 2 different screener) "Verse 2 is certainly imagery laden, but a tad specific for licensing. Could hear you coming up with an alt verse (for licensing) to avoid potential onscreen conflicts."
So I may do a rewrite of verse 2 but I'm a bit confused. The first review didn't mention verse 2 being an issue. But the second review didn't have a problem with verse 1...They both did say it was a strong contender for licensing with the mentioned changes.
I wrote the song from the viewpoint of a guy sitting on the steps of his old family home after attending a funeral of a loved one. The singer is talking about "the act" of coming home. He's realizing that it's not as bad as he thought it would be. Does that make sense to anyone else? Here's a link to the song. Thanks in advance, John
https://soundcloud.com/jp-pearson-1/com ... x2EHLXqGT1
NEW Revised with V1 and V2 swapped- https://soundcloud.com/jp-pearson-1/com ... 95LhbQsaXO
Coming Home
I’ve got a feeling I’m not going anywhere gonna sit awhile here on these stairs
And let the weathered memories come washing over me
This place I swore I’d never stay but now can’t bear to leave
Coming home, coming home
It’s funny how you miss the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Crooked street signs names like Church and Main faded blacktop sidewalks cracks don’t change
The baseball field where I stole home head-first and broke my wrist
The trees behind the playground where I tasted my first kiss
Coming home, coming home
It’s funny how you miss the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Tears and triumphs loves and losses never go away
They patiently sit waiting for a chance to have their say, a day just like today
Coming home, coming home, coming home, coming home
It’s funny when you fit the things you thought that you’d outgrown
Coming home, coming home
Words & Music ©2020 John L Pearson