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Just finished up this new song, looking for any and all feedback or suggestions! I think I will be submitting this version of the song to a listing tomorrow, I think it sounds good enough as a "completed" song, although I am still gonna be working on it. Anyways, let me know what you think!http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7452285-JeffEDIT: Specifically, I want to know if some of my pronouncing (R's, Th's, L',s) is off, I do have a slight speech impediment, and some people are telling me they can hear it, although I somehow have a hard time hearing anything wrong with my pronouncing. Let me know, thanks!-----------------------------------------The DarknessYou're so beautifulOn this sideBut in your shadowIt's not alrightWhy you telling meAll these lies?Your seeds are poisonousDeep insideYou lead me into your gardenYou show me secrets thatI never want to seeThe stars alignAnd then they collideEverything about you has shatteredThe broken glassFrom drinks in our handsIt shows me where the darkness has gatheredIt comes from youYou're so dangerousWith your smileCause you can make a manLose his sightWhy you tempt me withAll your lines?Those words so venomousDeep insideIt comes from youIt comes from youDon't you knowThat everything I ever wantedIt's not from any part of you

Hi Jeff,Wow cool tune.. love the melody and that full time chorus took me off guard! I like how you stick that acoustic in your face for the intro. Cool keyboard part in pre-chorus. The chorus does a great job of kicking in and bringing contrast.Little tweaks I heard:"I never want to see" and "And then they collide" could be tightened up pitch wiseCompression wise things get a bit squashed when the chorus comes in and makes it sound thinner to my ears. I'm also hearing a little distortion during the chorus which seems to be coming from limiting.Overall the mix is great though with a great spectral balance that grabs my ears and is pleasing. I'm jealous! I can TOTALLY hear this on alt radio!

Thanks for the suggestions Pat! There are some distortion elements in the chorus: electric/processed drums on the right, and a pushed-clean electric guitar in the left. It's supposed to make it just sound heavier and bigger, being the chorus and all.I do know what you mean by "i never want to see" being off, its hard to sing, switching into that falsetto like that. I'll have to work on that. "collide" also sounded weird, but I couldn't quite tell what was wrong with it, but that's another I'll have to re-record.-Jeff

Yeah just little tweaks.. but you've got a great sense of melody, structure, and production values which are a rare combo I'd say.

Another really good production, Jeff. Your recording techniques are giving the chorus a good lift as you desired.I am hearing some pronunciation issues, especially with "th's".What are your intentions with your songs?Vince

Thanks for the comments, Vince...well, I am starting my band now (gonna be playing our first shows over the summer), and now our goal is to try to record a full-length album of about 10-12 songs. So I guess my goal is to get that album done. And to see if I can get any success here on TAXI.-JeffEDIT: Oh and yeah, I am starting to hear distortion from my mastering, so I guess I pushed it too hard. Only noticed it when I listened to the songs thru my headphones.

Mar 23, 2009, 3:52pm, heckxx wrote:Just finished up this new song, looking for any and all feedback or suggestions! I think I will be submitting this version of the song to a listing tomorrow, I think it sounds good enough as a "completed" song, although I am still gonna be working on it. Anyways, let me know what you think!http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7452285-JeffEDIT: Specifically, I want to know if some of my pronouncing (R's, Th's, L',s) is off, I do have a slight speech impediment, and some people are telling me they can hear it, although I somehow have a hard time hearing anything wrong with my pronouncing. Let me know, thanks!-----------------------------------------The DarknessYou're so beautifulOn this sideBut in your shadowIt's not alrightWhy you telling meAll these lies?Your seeds are poisonousDeep insideYou lead me into your gardenYou show me secrets thatI never want to seeThe stars alignAnd then they collideEverything about you has shatteredThe broken glassFrom drinks in our handsIt shows me where the darkness has gatheredIt comes from youYou're so dangerousWith your smileCause you can make a manLose his sightWhy you tempt me withAll your lines?Those words so venomousDeep insideIt comes from youIt comes from youDon't you knowThat everything I ever wantedIt's not from any part of you This song has a terrific young, modern vibe... Reminds me of some of the bands my college age kids got me into like Something Corporate. That's a good thing! Youthful & modern...The mix sound excellent to me. In a few places, my preference would be for the lyric to be a bit more unique- you made to need to touch that up to get over the higher bar. But the overall impact of the song is so good, it might not matter.Good luck! Casey

Good God!!! Lovely song!The only part I noticed... "You lead me into your garden" lead sounded a little like read..but if U didn't mention it... I may not even have noticed it at all...Lovely song! Well done!-K

Hey this is a little bit Linkin Parkish... just a little.. Hope U don't hate that band =)

Thanks for the comments, Casey and reasondemon! K, there's very few bands that I don't like, I try to listen to as many different bands to get my influences and ideas. Having an open mind about listening to all music I think is much more beneficial than being angry at certain over-popular or "sell-out" bands. The way I see it, those bands are popular for a reason, and I better figure out why -Jeff