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Good

Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 6:29 am
by lindpop
This is my latest song: Good to see ya. What do you think? All from lyric to melody to production and so on. New file 09-02-07. Dave, thanks for the help and support with this song Thanks for listeningKind regards

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 6:57 am
by davekershaw
I like this a lot Stephan.Very catchy chorus. Very innocent and cute song.I'm getting a lot of hiss in the background though.A couple of grammatical points, if you don't mind my saying.Sorry if I'm not getting your idea right:"our life’s lied like open cards"our lives lay like open cards."directions of our life, went by, like leafs from a tree"directions of our lives, went by, like leaves from a tree.I don't think it's really the right phrasing;you mean you each went in different directions, and, your lives went by quickly, like leaves from a tree.Maybe: "We grew older. Directions of our lives, they changed,went by, like leaves from a tree."Sorry for any negativity.I really like the melody and the story.These songs about remembering our childhood are really poignant.Makes me think of friends I played with all those years ago, then drifted apart."like time has standing still"like life was standing still.this could go far, given full production, and the right placing.Everyone had a childhood, hopefully happy,and these kind of nostalgic songs tug at the old heartstrings.Very well done,Dave.

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 10:11 am
by lindpop
Thank you so very much Dave for your kind words and taking your time. Feels real good. I need these corrections and help. It ain´t easy with the grammar. I will make those corrections.I will look over the hiss. I guess it´s from my guitar and bass. Maybe from other parts too.I´m not satisfied with the line: like leaves from a treemaybe it would be better with: like branches in a treeThanks a lot for helping me.

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:48 am
by davekershaw
Jan 30, 2009, 12:11pm, lindpop wrote:Thank you so very much Dave for your kind words and taking your time. Feels real good. I need these corrections and help. It ain´t easy with the grammar. I will make those corrections.I will look over the hiss. I guess it´s from my guitar and bass. Maybe from other parts too.I´m not satisfied with the line: like leaves from a treemaybe it would be better with: like branches in a treeThanks a lot for helping me.You're welcome Stephan.It's sounding better.This song would be really good in a Disney type film, you know, like "You've got a friend in me".I'll pm you with some other thoughts rather than sound like an English teacher here.Cheers,Dave.

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 11:04 am
by lindpop
Thanks to Dave I changed a few things in the lyric. It´s not easy being Swedish with all those little grammar issues. Thank you Dave!New lyric & new fileGood to see yaWhen we where young we where a little gang my friends and IWe where the kids, the boys of our town, our life’s lay like open cardsWe fooled around, Played different kinds of games, at night, we watched videos on TVHarmless kids enjoying our time, No trouble in mindREFIt´s good to see ya, good to be with yaIt´s good to hear ya, my friend x2It´s good to see yaWe grew older, directions of our life, they changed, like leaves in a treewe moved around, lived another kind of life, long time no seeOnce a while I get around to our town it´s like time standing stillREF:Bridgewe live our life, so apart but when we meet it´s like yesterday to meTime goes by and I hope my friend that everything’s alrightREFI had to record the guitar part once more. To much hiss in that part. I´m going to by a new preamp.Well, back to the song. What do you think?Kind regards

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 12:06 am
by davekershaw
Sounding real good Stephan!Dave.

Re: Good to see ya

Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 2:59 am
by lindpop
Thanks Dave!