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Superstar version like 4!!??Updated with last vers
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 4:07 am
by geo
Hey guys I wrote this back in Feb but haven't gotten a hold of it yet.... last version was more Indie Rock in production.....
http://www.taximusic.com/download/94756/Superstar.mp3....... but the screener said the melody was more country so I dug out this version that a friend did some country - ish guitar work on.... still rough... redid drums... will be redoing vocals.... Looking for any and all comments.... but mostly song help/suggestions...Mix has gotta be off.... I've had water in my ear for a week now.... can't get rid of it...Thanks, Peace, Geohttp://
www.taximusic.com/download/189101/Super ... starGeoTen thousand dollars for that hand-bag, Ten thousand dollars for those shoes,And everyone treats you like a star even when you crash your car, I saw it on E! Entertainment and they called it news.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos.I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.You paid ten thousand dollars for that diamond,Ten thousand dollars for those clothes.And you think you have arrived, played on Saturday Night Live,But you lip synced your songs and girlfriend everybody knows.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos.I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.Used to be we saw your face everywhere,Used to be you blew your nose we all cared,Used to be everything you touched turned to gold,But now the clock’s, tick, ticking who’s afraid to grow old.Ten thousand dollars worth of Botox, Ten thousand dollars for that nose,And so many little girls want nothing more in the worldWhy they want to be like you God only knows.Got your Hermis and your Cartier and your Chanel too,Oscar DeLarenta, honey now don’t forget those shoes.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos. I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.Well you ain’t no Superstar, no.Said you ain’t no Superstar.Tell me who in the hell do you think you are?
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 4:35 am
by stephen1977
Buffalo Springfield? The verse sections sound a lot like something he had done. Certainly not a bad thing.Nice clean sounding guitars. I like the little fills squeezed in between certain phrases. Sounds like a seasoned player that knows what he/she is doing.The overall mix could use some work for sure, but I won't dwell too much on that.I'm not completely sold on the lead singer, but I don't hate him either. He gets the job done, but I think his overall vocal performance could be polished up and performed a little bit better. Its close though. Don't be discouraged there.Its has a touch of Country quality, but I can't sit here and call it Country, really, at all Geo. This has more of a Southern Rock feel to me buddy. Yeah, this isn't Country at all. Sure it could go that way, but not with this treatment.I like the harmony work during the chorus sections. Very dynamic and really helped push the envelope and give this song some depth. Very nice. Reminds me a tad bit of YES during these sections, in a Roundabout type way.I'm not really sold on the drums either. That hi-hat is killing me man. Drums don't seem to be mixed as well as they should. Snare is getting buried when the vocals really kick in and they really should be damn near the same level.The song has a lot of catchy qualities my man. You still have some work to do on it, but this isn't bad. It shows a lot of promise. But, yeah, not country. Southern Rock all the way.Thanks for sharing my man and good luck with the final version. Keep us posted!
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 5:13 am
by zingstone
For some inexplicable reason, after I glanced over the lyrics I was expecting a Techno tune, but you don’t need to know that.I definitely appreciate the sentiments expressed so eloquently in this song, and I particularly liked the cross-reference to ten thousand, because that number does scan so very well.First complaint is that the mid 8 isn’t melodically, sonically or rhythmically different enough from the surrounding parts. Finding a way to lift it up would really breathe air into the arrangement, and the backing vocals probably need to be utilised more in that.Secondly, the attack on the lead vocal is quite uniform, and more variation in the verses would make the listener inclined to pay greater attention. I do like the octave pairing for punctuation but it might just be a tad overused.The bass is great throughout but it might benefit the dynamics to have it more sparse in the intro, creating more impact when it’s due.“Who in the hell do you think you are?” is the hook in my book and would benefit from some inventive and contrasting backing vocals.Because I’m a minimalist I think you might be guilty of trying to fit too many ideas into one song. There are a lot of words and some parts seem to tumble over one another because of the lack of stretch. However, it was no ordeal to listen to this several times over.
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 6:39 am
by ideascapes
Hey, Geo, good to see you back. The guitar(s) are definitely very well played and recorded.Really inventive arrangement here, with the tag at the end of the chorus and tempo/feel change for the guitar break and bridge. The lyric has some great detail, although I think I agree with zing that you might find another/better title.I think you got some potentially good advice on "go country," but realize that if you do, you have to nail the style by Nashville standards or they won't know what to do with it. As stephen pointed out--that guy is an amazing musical encyclopedia, by the way--you've got a mixed bag going here. There are elements of indie rock still (drums), country (guitars), country rock (vocal phrasing, arrangement). Right now, it absolutely has your stamp on it, and if that's what you're looking for, congrats! As for pitching it to somebody else, it would take a leap I think.If you can find the right person (and budget), I'd be very tempted to turn this over to a country producer and let him/her have at it. Either way, props to you--it's a creative piece of work!Vince
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 9:41 am
by hummingbird
Mix does seem to need some work, & some of the vocals are off pitch here and there. But I agree with the above comment... it's got a 60-ish pop-folk sound right now, momma's & poppa's. Doesn't sound like country at all, cept maybe the guitar part.the lyrics are pretty cool, music is just fine too. just need to work on producing it effectively. I'd listen to some Toby Keith or Alan Jackson and get that kinda wry, tongue-in-cheek delivery of music & vocals.
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 2:24 pm
by cjdenecia
Nov 30, 2008, 6:07am, geo wrote:Hey guys I wrote this back in Feb but haven't gotten a hold of it yet.... last version was more Indie Rock in production but the screener said the melody was more country so I dug out this version that a friend did some country - ish guitar work on.... still rough... redid drums... will be redoing vocals.... Looking for any and all comments.... but mostly song help/suggestions...Mix has gotta be off.... I've had water in my ear for a week now.... can't get rid of it...Thanks, Peace, Geohttp://
www.taximusic.com/download/189101/Super ... starGeoTen thousand dollars for that hand-bag, Ten thousand dollars for those shoes,And everyone treats you like a star even when you crash your car, I saw it on E! Entertainment and they called it news.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos.I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.You paid ten thousand dollars for that diamond,Ten thousand dollars for those clothes.And you think you have arrived, played on Saturday Night Live,But you lip synced your songs and girlfriend everybody knows.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos.I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.Used to be we saw your face everywhere,Used to be you blew your nose we all cared,Used to be everything you touched turned to gold,But now the clock’s, tick, ticking who’s afraid to grow old.Ten thousand dollars worth of Botox, Ten thousand dollars for that nose,And so many little girls want nothing more in the worldWhy they want to be like you God only knows.Got your Hermis and your Cartier and your Chanel too,Oscar DeLarenta, honey now don’t forget those shoes.Got your Dolce & Gabbana, and your Jimmy Choos. I’ve got ten thousand reasons not to be like you.Who in the hell do you think you are,You think you’re a Superstar.Well you ain’t no Superstar, no.Said you ain’t no Superstar.Tell me who in the hell do you think you are?well amp ... to start ... you already know it - the drums blow bullocks. big. not in the part as much as the sound.but it's a quirky thing, this song .....it stumbles lyrically once in a while but then again it flows well sometimes too ....I hear a lot of old school southern california country rock in this ... from the late 60's and early 70's ... hell, poco could have made this into a great concert song to be honest.but that was then.and unless you can find a way to modernize it, that's where it's gonna live - in the past. which might be good for a taxi placement but won't make it a common ditty hummed by the population in 2009 ....but there's a lot of good here.the octave answers on the vox were fresh. nice. the bass drive was cool ... I liked it's dance in and around the chords.I also like how it moved up for the chorus ... and that ending chorus into the next verse is so loggins and messina meets the nitty gritty dirt band ...your vocals on the major lead is raw and a little weak - but that's sorta charming. but I do think, tho you do wanna keep it loose, there's enough bumps to resing as you said ... keep it easy but keep it as tight as you can, the end result will probably be about right .... timing on the bridge is horrid as it goes ... what happened? 2:02 - TIGHTEN THAT UP. (sorry HB, I know YOU are the only one allowed to YELL!!! - that's a banning!)btw - indie rock? who gave you that idea for a previous version? I wouldn't suggest mike tysoning his ear, or playing cocktag (my nephew told me about that game ... he's a cop in milwalkie ... when your buddy isn't expecting it - you tag him, with your fist, guess where? you're it!) - anyway, I don't think you should do that, just don't ever talk to him again and don't line your sister up with his sister .. or brother ... or dad ... or whatever - stay away from him!anyway, treat this as a retro country rock thing and keep it tucked into the middle of a cd and don't expect a big hit out of it - just some fun and some people who will tell you - THIS is my favorite amp song!"cus it will appeal to some.and on that note, the best thing to do is just redo what you have, tweak the words a bit here and there to get them to flow easier, pro up the parts a little on the rough spots (addictive drums, my R&B guy swears by them - pick a kit that is organic cus this song is)and mix it a little "today" and a little beatlesque. don't be afraid to pan hard with stuff ... in and out. here and there. voices and instruments ... make sure the kit sits in the stereo field like a kit does. you may end up finding the song takes on new life just with a few tweaks.ohhh and study some 70's cali-country rock (not the eagles - too smooth ...)good luck. btw - do you know who told the teacher on me?
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 2:27 pm
by stephen1977
Cj.You and your Loggins.Jesus.
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 2:59 pm
by cjdenecia
Nov 30, 2008, 4:27pm, stephen1977 wrote:Cj.You and your Loggins.Jesus.you've never even heard "on stage" have you puppy poop?
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 3:03 pm
by stephen1977
Nov 30, 2008, 4:59pm, cjdenecia wrote:Nov 30, 2008, 4:27pm, stephen1977 wrote:Cj.You and your Loggins.Jesus.you've never even heard "on stage" have you puppy poop?Cj... ...I been working so hard, Keep punching my cardEight hours, for what? Oh, tell me what I gotI get this feeling That time's just holding me downI'll hit the ceiling Or else I'll tear up this townTonight I gotta cut......Don't make me bust out Danger Zone man. You know you can hear that FMbass a rollin'.
Re: Superstar version like 4!!??
Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 3:27 pm
by billg
hey Geo, I remember the other version of this song & for what it's worth I like this better. That said, you've got a lot of work here to make this a country tune imo. I'd start with the drums and see where that takes you. The drums you have now aren't country drums at all. If you can get the drums into the "country" then you should be able to do the same with the bass. If you're not able to get those two things where they need to be you just might have to face the reality that this just might not be a country song.