Rock/electronica? for review (instrumental)

[anne]

Hello, A few of you helped me with some feedback when this was about 30 seconds long (thanks!) and I would like some more feedback on the full version (which is 2:06 - either :06 too long, or :24 too short)I am concerned because its 20 seconds to the melody, but the first 20 seconds works well on its own. I'm not sure if its ok to bend the rule as this is a different style for me. I removed the vocals and left it as an instrumental. Also, the guitar solo needs a lot of work I think. OK, otherwise I think it really moves and would like to make it very good. I got a rejection from a library today so this is my answer to the rejection - make this different song complete and send it to them!!Thanks in advance. http://www.taxi.com/kurlyqueen and get JUST LIKE ME (ANNE HOUSE_ASCAP)

[hummingbird]

Hi Anne - there's some nice stuff here but I'm not sure if it all works together in terms of the different textures in the piece in the beginning. In film/tv they want definitive mood right from the start. I suggest starting it at 1:11 (I PM'd you the details). I think it's pretty cool though - good work!!

[mazz]

Hi Anne,Cool sounds in this one!I think you have 2 maybe 3 pieces in one here! The intro could make a cool kind of ambient piece (after the drums). When the more shuffly feel comes in at around 1:11 or so, it was kind of jarring given what came before. I'm with Vikki, I think that's the start of the second piece. Then the last 30 seconds or so could be another cool ambient piece, maybe the B section of the first one.The part from 1:11 on sounds kind of like progressive rock to me, like Gentle Giant or something (only in 4/4!). The organ sound and the drum sound are two things that take it out of the strictly electronica genre to me. That's OK but I think you need to decide what genre the piece is in and go with that. If you were going to go more electronica, I'd change the drums to electronic drums and maybe make the patterns a bit less busy. I'd let go of the organ sound and replace it with a pulsating synth or something. I heard some cool possibilities with the guitar solo like chopping it up, more stuttering FX, etc. I think you should re-cut the solo and play a few fewer notes which I think would make it more cohesive. Also the rhythm guitar tracks sound a bit "loose" in timing in some spots. That's easy enough to fix in ProTools and more of a mechanical feel might help the electronica side anyway.Sounds like the new studio is a very creative space for you! Keep up the good work!Mazz

[keithl]

I agree, a couple themes in there, and pick a genre (with what Mazz said) and go full tilt with it. There are a couple different conflicting vibes that keep it from slamming home what genre it wants to be.Good luck!

[anne]

Hi guys - Thanks for the feedback so far. I can't wait to go work on this in the morning and listen to it, paying attention to the times / sections that were suggested in the thread, and see where I can take it today. I love the feedback I get on this board; more comments are always welcome!

[Casey H]

Hi AnneI'm listening through headphones. Nice sounds here! I agree that it should be broken up and pitched as separate segments. For film/TV, mood changes in mid-stream aren't really ideal. People are usually looking for "uptempo rocking" or "mellow electronica"-- any one specific vibe, etc.. That doesn't mean there are never possibilities when there are a lot of changes, but much less so. Best, Casey

[anne]

Hi Casey - thanks for the compliments on the sounds - I guess that means my speaker and acoustic foam are generally placed correctly since this is the first song I didn't use headphones on (at all). This is a big thing for me to get used to, and I'm glad that the sounds (and mix, I hope) was "transortable". I started separating it into 2 pieces today - very rough "cut and pastes" without any corrections or proper instrumentation is on my page at taxi.com/kurlyqueen - just to generate ideas of how to chop it up. Maybe I'll learn enough to feel like I know what I'm doing soon (on the Logic software, anyway..)!

[andreh]

Hi Anne-Good job on your piece! As far as the mix goes, I found it to have an overabundance of upper midrange and high frequencies (especially on the most repetitive parts) which makes it somewhat hard to listen to.This is a gross generalization, but try backing off frequencies above 2-3kHz on the the frequently played sounds, and let the higer frequencies come from sounds heard less often...this gives the ear a break and makes the highs sound brighter since they are, in contrast to the other sounds.Keep at it!André

[anne]

Thanks for the tip Andreh - If I'm going to be learning, I need to look at the whole picture. I'm not sure exactly which parts you were referring to so I'm off to watch the tracks with my eq on. Since you said "on the most repetitive parts" I'm guessing that is the sections with the guitar playing ? that are the culprit.Since I tried to got the sounds as close to what I wanted without any eq on the tracks, this should be an easy fix - thanks for the input!

[andreh]

Quote:I'm off to watch the tracks with my eq on....and listen to them, too! Perhaps you could keep a commercial reference track in your session to compare your mix to often.Quote:I'm guessing that is the sections with the guitar playing?I hear the problem throughout the whole piece, but the most repetitive parts (or the ones that take up the most "time") are good candidates for a reduction in high frequencies to give the listeners' ears a break. André