Lyric/structure feedback?- Americana/Singer-Songwriter
Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2019 9:02 pm
Hello!
I thought I'd try getting a little help on this one. I like it but I think It could definitely use a little more structure, also would just like some general feedback?
-Bridge is pretty half hearted and am not attached to it.
- This recording is just me paying into a condenser. Unfortunately don't have a whole lot more options than that at the moment.
- Might pitch this to an Americana listing if it truly the right fit, but not country...unless you hear something I don't?
Really just looking for any and all suggestions, new here and could use some real critical feedback.
Thank you!!
https://soundcloud.com/annalynchmusic/d ... wn/s-0T0Eh
Lyrics:
Don’t Want To Die in a Small Town
(V1)I don’t wanna die in a small town,
Where those roads never end
I don’t wanna die in a hotel room
Where nobody knows that I’m dead
I don’t wanna see the look on the face of my mom when I tell her I hate this place,
I don’t wanna die in a small town
Hmmm mmmm
(V2) And I don’t wanna see you again
Cuz i’d say something that I regret
And I wish I could wish you the best
But to tell you the truth i’m not there yet
Chorus:
Call it a mission
Call it something
Call it feet that need running
For all I care call the fire department
Don’t know when and I don’t know how
All i know is I don’t wanna die in a small town
(V3)I can’t live on the back of my hand
Don’t matter that you don’t understand
I can’t be some forgotten face
In a yearbook photo you just cant cant place
Bridge:
And you know I love you and always will but you cant see the world from the top of a hill
Chorus:
Call if faith call it a mission
Call it wreckless indecision
For all you know I’m good at something
Don’t know when and don’t know how
All I know is I don’t
Wanna die in a small town
I thought I'd try getting a little help on this one. I like it but I think It could definitely use a little more structure, also would just like some general feedback?
-Bridge is pretty half hearted and am not attached to it.
- This recording is just me paying into a condenser. Unfortunately don't have a whole lot more options than that at the moment.
- Might pitch this to an Americana listing if it truly the right fit, but not country...unless you hear something I don't?
Really just looking for any and all suggestions, new here and could use some real critical feedback.
Thank you!!
https://soundcloud.com/annalynchmusic/d ... wn/s-0T0Eh
Lyrics:
Don’t Want To Die in a Small Town
(V1)I don’t wanna die in a small town,
Where those roads never end
I don’t wanna die in a hotel room
Where nobody knows that I’m dead
I don’t wanna see the look on the face of my mom when I tell her I hate this place,
I don’t wanna die in a small town
Hmmm mmmm
(V2) And I don’t wanna see you again
Cuz i’d say something that I regret
And I wish I could wish you the best
But to tell you the truth i’m not there yet
Chorus:
Call it a mission
Call it something
Call it feet that need running
For all I care call the fire department
Don’t know when and I don’t know how
All i know is I don’t wanna die in a small town
(V3)I can’t live on the back of my hand
Don’t matter that you don’t understand
I can’t be some forgotten face
In a yearbook photo you just cant cant place
Bridge:
And you know I love you and always will but you cant see the world from the top of a hill
Chorus:
Call if faith call it a mission
Call it wreckless indecision
For all you know I’m good at something
Don’t know when and don’t know how
All I know is I don’t
Wanna die in a small town