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Rough version. Just wanted to get the idea down.
Would this work for "Modern Country" with the right production?
Other feedback?
Thanks!

https://soundcloud.com/kerry-cox-9/anyb ... MI0mu5jCpA

Anybody But You


Verse 1
I can love you from afar
Don’t need to see your charms
Or have you here in my arms.

Verse 2
Out of sight, not out of mind
You’re still in my head
And that won’t change til I’m dead

Pre-Chorus 1
Everybody keeps telling me
Just give it a year, maybe 2…but

Chorus 1
Anybody but you
Just makes blue
Anybody but you
Just don’t do
Did I make up my mind
Or did I find it to be true…
I will never love anybody but you.

Verse 2
I could find another girl
Tell her she’s the one for me
But just how cruel would that be?

When you and I already know
There’s a scar on my heart
In the shape of your face
And it can’t be erased
Or replaced by

Chorus 2
Anybody but you
Just makes blue
Anybody but you
Just don’t do
Did I make up my mind
Or did I find it to be true…
I will never love anybody but...

Bridge
You still make me smile
In the middle of the night
when I wake up alone
Take a look at my phone
Make believe that you’re there
As I stare at the face of nobody but you...

Chorus 3
Anybody but you
And I’ll still be blue
She…
Just won’t do.
Did I make up my mind
Or did I find it to be true…
I will never love anybody but you.

Hey man.

Absolutely that could be produced in a contemporary style. I really like the song overall. There's way more positive than negative.
I like how you utilize the hook line in different ways, and how you connect the second chorus and bridge together with a common 'you'. You go lots of interesting places within a fairly simple structure.

The only thing that sticks out to my ear is that 'anybody' is abrupt when the 'body' is as fast as you're singing it, and that word comes up all over the place. Just jamming it here, I'm finding that it sounds better smoothed out with the same pace for each syllable in that word instead of rushing the 'body'. I'm probably making it sound much more complicated than what I mean.

Good job! Do you have a particular listing you're tracking that for?

Trev

TrevFury wrote: ↑

Mon Jun 29, 2020 7:52 pm

Hey man.

Absolutely that could be produced in a contemporary style. I really like the song overall. There's way more positive than negative.
I like how you utilize the hook line in different ways, and how you connect the second chorus and bridge together with a common 'you'. You go lots of interesting places within a fairly simple structure.

The only thing that sticks out to my ear is that 'anybody' is abrupt when the 'body' is as fast as you're singing it, and that word comes up all over the place. Just jamming it here, I'm finding that it sounds better smoothed out with the same pace for each syllable in that word instead of rushing the 'body'. I'm probably making it sound much more complicated than what I mean.

Good job! Do you have a particular listing you're tracking that for?

Trev

Thanks, Trev...interesting. I thought of the "anybody but" phrasing as the main hook, so I wasn't hesitant to use it a bunch. But maybe you're right. Would be interesting to hear if others have the same reaction. No specific listing. Will be looking for a home for it!

coxnvox wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 30, 2020 4:20 am

TrevFury wrote: ↑

Mon Jun 29, 2020 7:52 pm

Hey man.

Absolutely that could be produced in a contemporary style. I really like the song overall. There's way more positive than negative.
I like how you utilize the hook line in different ways, and how you connect the second chorus and bridge together with a common 'you'. You go lots of interesting places within a fairly simple structure.

The only thing that sticks out to my ear is that 'anybody' is abrupt when the 'body' is as fast as you're singing it, and that word comes up all over the place. Just jamming it here, I'm finding that it sounds better smoothed out with the same pace for each syllable in that word instead of rushing the 'body'. I'm probably making it sound much more complicated than what I mean.

Good job! Do you have a particular listing you're tracking that for?

Trev

Thanks, Trev...interesting. I thought of the "anybody but" phrasing as the main hook, so I wasn't hesitant to use it a bunch. But maybe you're right. Would be interesting to hear if others have the same reaction. No specific listing. Will be looking for a home for it!

I agree with everything Trev said: great idea, great execution, nice use of the irony. And I agree the rhythm of the word 'anybody' seems out of place. There's nothing else in the piece that prepares me for it; on first listen it sounds like you had a melody in mind and then had to shoehorn a bunch of syllables into a pre-determined space. I agree it makes the title words stand out, but I'm not sure if it's in a good way... maybe try it with a bunch of different rhythms and articulations and see what feels as good as - or better than - what you have there. There are a lot of ways to give a melody an accent, speeding up is only one of many.

Clearly Mr. Hall knows what he's talking about.

I had another listen and jammed out parts of it with that line slowed to a more uniform rhythm and it rolls off the tongue very naturally to me. I do really like the tune. If I can assist with tracking, whether it's guitar, harmony vox, or whatever, I'd be happy to contribute.

Very nice. That acoustic is really clean. Like to hear this slightly slower so the lyrics have more impact. sounds rushed. Just a thought. Also the singer has a nice voice, but a singer with a southern drawl would give this track a big nudge forward. congrats on this

Sincerely
Paul

AlanHall wrote: ↑

Tue Jun 30, 2020 2:25 pm

I agree with everything Trev said: great idea, great execution, nice use of the irony. And I agree the rhythm of the word 'anybody' seems out of place. There's nothing else in the piece that prepares me for it; on first listen it sounds like you had a melody in mind and then had to shoehorn a bunch of syllables into a pre-determined space. I agree it makes the title words stand out, but I'm not sure if it's in a good way... maybe try it with a bunch of different rhythms and articulations and see what feels as good as - or better than - what you have there. There are a lot of ways to give a melody an accent, speeding up is only one of many.

Thanks, Alan! I really appreciate your thoughts...making me rethink a few things!

TrevFury wrote: ↑

Wed Jul 01, 2020 12:59 am

Clearly Mr. Hall knows what he's talking about.

I had another listen and jammed out parts of it with that line slowed to a more uniform rhythm and it rolls off the tongue very naturally to me. I do really like the tune. If I can assist with tracking, whether it's guitar, harmony vox, or whatever, I'd be happy to contribute.

Ha! True! Thanks so much for the advice and the offer to help. I'm going to get this one demo'ed by one of the Nashville companies but I'd love to reach out to you in the future for stuff I decide to demo in house...is guitar your main instrument?

feaker66 wrote: ↑

Thu Jul 02, 2020 7:13 am

Very nice. That acoustic is really clean. Like to hear this slightly slower so the lyrics have more impact. sounds rushed. Just a thought. Also the singer has a nice voice, but a singer with a southern drawl would give this track a big nudge forward. congrats on this

Sincerely
Paul

Thanks, Paul! Yeah, this was just a down and dirty demo I did in a couple hours. I'll get it done by Nashville Demo Factory and let them put a nice country spin on it. The singer is me, and I am certainly NOT country-sounding enough!!

I also just tried it a little slower and I think you might be right on that...it's SO good to get ears on a song before one commits money to getting it demo'ed!!! Really appreciate you taking time. Take care!

Coxnvox,

Ideally, to me, there are two ways in which this structure could be presented with more universal appeal:

1. Change the "body buts" from 3 sixteenths to 2 eights followed by a quarter note. (At least do so the final time we hear it in the chorus.)

2. Have either a small group of singers, or a single female vocalist mimick, or "echo" the "body buts" to intentionally give it more emphasis. (Like taking something just a little bit "odd" and putting it in a position for the listeners to more immediately copy-sing and make the song memorable, more quickly.

Hope that gives you some more ideas to consider.

Best!

John Dale