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Jaderberg wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 18, 2022 8:59 am

but I just can't figure out what's wrong with it

AlanHall wrote: ↑

Wed Oct 19, 2022 9:27 am

Jaderberg wrote: ↑

Tue Oct 18, 2022 8:59 am

but I just can't figure out what's wrong with it

Is this a test? I listened for 90 sec and the clarinetist had not yet taken a breath

But seriously, consider how the piece is phrased. I'm not getting the 'ebb and flow' of a conversation between two instruments. Add space, and then each phrase can come to a meaningful (musical) conclusion. That's my suggestion for breathing some life into the piece. Pun intended!

Telefunkin wrote: ↑

Wed Oct 19, 2022 11:14 am

Hi,
Nice piano playing, but crazy clarinet - no breaths as Alan says.

I also think Alan is absolutely correct in suggesting that the two players take the focus in turns, and while one is 'speaking' the other is sits back and is less busy (or even drops out), so they need to ebb and flow through each musical phrase until they've said their piece.

Finally, you say its a cue, but in that case why is it 5:30s long? Usually, 2:00 - 2:30 is plenty long enough for most libraries.

irthlingz wrote: ↑

Wed Oct 19, 2022 3:01 pm

Also, think about what mood you're going for, or what kind of scene this might accompany. Mostly, it seems like maybe walking along a peaceful country road. Then occasionally, something dissonant comes in (for example, around 2:55). This could fit if you're scoring an existing scene, but for a cue for a library, the advice we've received is to stick to one basic mood and communicate that mood in the title, so that the end user knows what to expect in the cue. Of course, you probably want to build or at least keep a feeling of forward movement. But sudden changes like those dissonances could make life difficult for an editor trying to use the cue.

=== Sharon & Michael ===

Paulie wrote: ↑

Wed Oct 19, 2022 6:58 pm

I'm a wind player... you need to add breaths, dynamics and perhaps a touch of vibrato occasionally. The piano sounds close, the clarinet sounds like it is in the next room. The clarinet patch itself is not very strong, software libraries these days are very good, this would fall into the category of "too MIDI." Overall the melody needs space... sing along with your melody and note exactly where you take breaths to keep up. Then add those spaces. The patch should take advantage of dynamics by using the Modulation wheel on your controller, so experiment with that to improve the realism.