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Need help!

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:56 am
by orest
I got a very positive review of one of my songs (several in fact, but I need some feedback on this one). The reviewer told me that the production, arrangement, lyrics and the vocal were really great (8/10) and the music got 5/10 because he thought it was a bit dated. I can agree with this and he told me if I make it more contemporary this one could be a hit. He didn't tell me how i could make it more contemporary, and that's fine! NOTICE! This is now the NEW version of this song, not the one I have sent to Taxi. http://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_ ... tream=true

Re: Need help!

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 7:53 am
by mer
Well I'm sorry I can't offer much in the way of how to make it contemporary, I hope someone else will have some great ideas for you! Because I really enjoyed this song, the lyrics and most of all the voice, just lovely and also different enough to be very engaging. Lots of honesty coming through in a fresh way... great work!How I'd want to hear it would be to change the sound of the keyboard, perhaps that is the most dated sound. Then change-up the drum sounds maybe. But I am no kind of expert with this!--Mer

Re: Need help!

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 10:47 am
by orest
Yeah, I am thinking about the keyboard sound as well. I am using a Rhodes here, but Justin Timberlake is doing that as well, that's why I'm a bit confused. The drum track are changed. I will renew the vocals as well, I sung this when I was having a terrible cold, but I wanted it to get through to one of the listings as well in time. Thanks for your input!

Re: Need help!

Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 8:41 am
by mer
Do you have a link to a Justin Timberlake song that you think this one sounds like? That would be another avenue at least for more opinions from me! At least if there is some "a la" you think you are aiming for. Or maybe post the listing you got that critique for, where the music wasn't rated as high... --Mer

Re: Need help!

Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 9:17 am
by nickfever
My gues would be that the synth and drums/percussion are what make it sound "dated."Just my initial thought.Good luck,Nick

Re: Need help!

Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 11:01 am
by orest
Maybe using a grand piano (like Alicia Keys No one) or Strings instead of the Rhodes piano? I really cannot find the clip with Justin for the moment, but he was using the Rhodes quite a bit on his tour future sex/Love sounds

Re: Need help!

Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 8:04 am
by orest
Now you can listen to the NEW version of the song! http://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_ ... tream=true

Re: Need help!

Posted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:43 am
by hazineju
Hi Orest, great song. tonnnnnnnnns of potential if you ask me! i can hear it going towards justin timberlake but it still sounds a bit dated. i was A/Bing just now with Justin's "my love." at :50 seconds into that song he's got that funky similar synthish organ (is that a rhodes, i have no idea) but it sounds like there's some fx on it. i can't tell you WHAT the difference is, but try to go for that sound. also you will notice in the comparison that there is a lot you can do with the EQ to make it sound more comparable. listen to how the beats just pop out on that song. you can play with other production stuff like panning back and forth instead of the sound staying in one place, and throw in a couple electronic sounds here and there in some empty spots to make it funkier. another thing justin seems to love to do is sing in octaves- and i could also hear that it would be cool to add a harmony or two in the last chorus on the "take your time" line. BTW you have a great voice- even with the cold! hope this is helpful! the song is definitely worth working on some more, it's awesome.

Re: Need help!

Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 9:33 am
by orest
Thanks to you all! I will definitely consider your advices! Please feel free to mail me if you want a listener!

Re: Need help!

Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 6:03 am
by devin
I recently set off the "retro-meter" with a Rhodes track for an ambient listing, so that had to get changed.I like this song! Great job orest...and your voice is really good for this song, IMO.What would happen if you had some guitar (distorted) in there? Nothing too overpowering, but maybe the unexpected tone just playing rythm would change the feel (just a bit more edge that way?). Just a thought...Nice job...certainly keep working on this song and keep pitching it (my $0.02).