My first time exposing myself like this, but(t)... (hopeful for constructive feedback)
Posted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 2:27 pm
Here's a little song I wrote, I like to sing it note for note, but I'm worried... it's too sappy... just kidding, just rhyming there... to an old tune... anyway... seriously, this is an original song that I wrote - before TAXI... and this is my first venture in this lyric Forum posting thing... hope it gets approved this time! Any feedback, constructive critique is most welcome... and if you think it is good, is it good enough to enter a songwriting competition? I've got a couple of other songs I might post, but seeing how this goes... thank you in advance. I've got music to it and everything... currently a down tempo ballad... I think it could work as a country song, or pop (like almost Stevie B)... if anyone has ideas on how to make it more contemporary, I'm all ears! thanks again! Clif (with one F)
One of these days
One of these days you’re going to find,
no one else can give you the peace of mind you long for.
One of these days you’re going to see,
the one you were looking for, for all this time was me.
PreChorus/Chorus:
Then I’ll be there, waiting for you-when you’re ready to believe.
One of these days, when love has come for me, one of these days you’ll see
v2
One of these nights — *on a night like this...
maybe you’ll reminisce- and you’ll begin to miss me.
One of these night, when you can’t sleep,
you’ll think about me and your heart will skip a beat.
Pre-chorus/Chorus
And then I’ll be there, waiting for you when you are ready to believe.
One of these days, you’ll see
v3
So until that day I’ll let you be
As much as I need you girl, or how much you need me…
you see, Love is something that anyone can feel
But, baby, commitment, oh… now that’s an act of will
PC
and so I’ll be there, waiting for you
till you are ready to believe
Chorus
one of these days - when love has come for me. One of this days, you’ll see
(musical solo to finish)
One of these days
One of these days you’re going to find,
no one else can give you the peace of mind you long for.
One of these days you’re going to see,
the one you were looking for, for all this time was me.
PreChorus/Chorus:
Then I’ll be there, waiting for you-when you’re ready to believe.
One of these days, when love has come for me, one of these days you’ll see
v2
One of these nights — *on a night like this...
maybe you’ll reminisce- and you’ll begin to miss me.
One of these night, when you can’t sleep,
you’ll think about me and your heart will skip a beat.
Pre-chorus/Chorus
And then I’ll be there, waiting for you when you are ready to believe.
One of these days, you’ll see
v3
So until that day I’ll let you be
As much as I need you girl, or how much you need me…
you see, Love is something that anyone can feel
But, baby, commitment, oh… now that’s an act of will
PC
and so I’ll be there, waiting for you
till you are ready to believe
Chorus
one of these days - when love has come for me. One of this days, you’ll see
(musical solo to finish)