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Hi y'all,
Just wrote another one last week. I would like this song to be along the same lines of 'Jesus, Take The Wheel' and 'God Bless The Broken Road' style. Any suggestions to improve the lyrics would be awesome. I would greatly appreciate any kind of feedback. Thanks for your time and attention.

"Held In Heaven's Arms"
Written by Darin Martin

V1
Found You standing by my side
You have been here all this time
When worries clouded my mind
Love like yours is hard to find

V2
You were standing next to me
When it's hard for me to breathe
It's still hard for me to see
What Your plan will be for me

Pre-Chorus
Sometimes I can't understand
Your promise and perfect plan
When I'm just a piece of sand
You still hold me in Your hand

Chorus
When I'm held in Heaven's arms
All my troubles fade away
I beg You please let me stay
A little more in Heaven's arms
So just let me stay longer
Your quiet peace makes me stronger
When I'm held in Heaven's arms

Instrumental

V3
You walked with me as my guide
When I laughed and when I cried
It's funny how our worlds collide
When I tried to run and hide

V4
You talked to me in the night
When I lost sight of the light
Everything was black and white
You taught me the wrong from right

Pre-Chorus
Sometimes I can't understand
Your promise and perfect plan
When I'm just a piece of sand
You still hold me in Your hand

Chorus
When I'm held in Heaven's arms
All my troubles fade away
I beg You please let me stay
A little more in Heaven's arms
Won't You let me rest longer
Your quiet peace makes me stronger
When I'm held in Heaven's arms

Hi Darin, been reading over your lyric, very nice sentiments. Without hearing the melody or knowing the tempo, it seems like it takes a while to get to the chorus. Verse 2 uses the word "me" four times, once in each line. Again, without hearing it, it reads a bit awkward. Maybe there are other ways of saying the same things. The last line of verse 2 you could even drop the word "me" and let it end with "be" or reverse it to "what your plans for "me may be".

These are just my first impressions. Someone else may have a totally different take on it.

You asked for other possible lyric suggestions, here's a couple of thoughts. Makes it sound like someone finding Christ. Best of luck,


Buc


V1
I found You standing by my side
Have you been here all this time
You eased the worries on my mind (You eased my troubled mind)
A love like that's so hard to find

"Held In Heaven's Arms"
Written by Darin Martin

V1
Found God standing by my side
He has been here all this time
When my troubles filled my mind
Love like God's was hard to find

V2
God was standing next to me
When I found it hard to breathe
My mind struggles just ot see
What God will want me to be

Pre-Chorus
It's so hard to understand
God's promise and perfect plan
Like a single speck of sand
God still holds me in His hand

Chorus
When I'm held in Heaven's arms
My troubles all fade away
I asked God to let me stay
Wrapped around in Heaven's arms
I needed to rest longer
God's strength will make me stronger
When I'm held in Heaven's arms

Instrumental

V3
God was with me as my guide
Through laughter and when I cried
I ran but I could not hide
Our worlds were meant to collide

V4
God talked to me in the night
When the darkness hid the light
God taught me how to live right
When my days were black and white

Pre-Chorus
It's so hard to understand
God's promise and perfect plan
Like a single speck of sand
God still holds me in His hand

Chorus
When I'm held in Heaven's arms
My troubles all fade away
I asked God to let me stay
Wrapped around in Heaven's arms
I needed to rest longer
God's strength will make me stronger
When I'm held in Heaven's arms

should speck of sand be grain?

I echo what bucy said, how long till the chorus hits?

I think you could use bucyesque v1 and miss v2 and go straight to the pre.