Alt Folk - vocal song

[deantaylor]

Hi Everyone,
Marc and I would appreciate some fresh ears on this new song.
Is it ready to pitch?
Any issues or room for improvement in anything?
Any alas?
All comments and ideas welcome.
https://s.disco.ac/stjtjpbkigzk
Thank You!

[DouglasKnight]

Hey Guys, I dig the Dylanesque vocal delivery on this and love the keys as well. I'm not a fan of the banjo carrying the entire song, and I got tired of the repetitive part, personally. I'd love to hear guitar to start, then have the banjo come in to add variety in verse 2. Cool bridge, and nice harmonies. Lyric-wise, I feel like the hook is two cliches put together, and could be stronger with a more fresh/original idea. That's my 2 cents, for what it's worth. Best of luck with it!

[deantaylor]

Hey Guys, I dig the Dylanesque vocal delivery on this and love the keys as well. I'm not a fan of the banjo carrying the entire song, and I got tired of the repetitive part, personally. I'd love to hear guitar to start, then have the banjo come in to add variety in verse 2. Cool bridge, and nice harmonies. Lyric-wise, I feel like the hook is two cliches put together, and could be stronger with a more fresh/original idea. That's my 2 cents, for what it's worth. Best of luck with it!

Thanks Douglas! That is all good food for thought as we move forward. New ears, a fresh perspective and honest feedback is so valuable .. worth more than 2 cents .. priceless

[Casey H]

Not lovin' the banjo. The repetition of that banjo picking gets tiresome. It could be taste, but it doesn't seem to me like a music sup would listen to this very long. I'm curious how it would sound with acoustic guitar instead of banjo, starting off with finger picking and going to strumming as part of the build. Maybe use the banjo only as a little ear candy in the song. In these headphones, which may not be the most accurate, the vocal sounds low in the mix, overwhelmed by the instrumentation. Grain of salt there.

The Ray of Hope chorus is a good one but I think it's lost in this approach.

You guys always do such great work. Sorry that this one doesn't work for me.

PS Do you have a reference artist/track in mind? That would help.

Best,
Casey

[marcblack30]

Thanks for the feedback folks. We are going for something similar to the Amigo the Devil song "Hell and You" which features the banjo. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kKR0swpEhg

Does this change anything, or do you still hate it? haha. This is pretty different from things we've done in the past, but fun to try new things.

Marc

[Casey H]

Thanks for the feedback folks. We are going for something similar to the Amigo the Devil song "Hell and You" which features the banjo. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kKR0swpEhg

Does this change anything, or do you still hate it? haha. This is pretty different from things we've done in the past, but fun to try new things.

Marc

OK, I get a better idea of the target. A clearer upfront vocal and a little less piercing on the banjo would help. The Dire Straits/Dylan vocal might not be the best, maybe use a different vocalist, more with a sound like the reference. In the reference, I the instrumentation is quieter and never buries the vocal.

Don't hate it, LOL!

[feaker66]

Hi 2 cents only Like to hear as much as 4% delay on the vox. Not a fan of total dry. When I can see comes in, a lot is lost with the vocal and too much background. Maybe duck the other tracks slightly at that time. cool vibe/lyrics congrats
sincerely Paul

[deantaylor]

Casey: Thanks for giving this 2 listens! We will listen with fresh ears, but I suspect you are right that getting a clearer upfront vocal and quieter instrumentation could improve things. I agree, Marc's voice is not like Amigo the Devil, but for now we are cool with that since we are just using his song for inspiration. I personally really like Marc's vox on this, and hope we find an alt-folk ala similar to Marc's vocal.

Paul: Thanks! And good to get a song review by you again. It's been a few years since Marc and I have been on this forum. Good to be back! You have similar feedback to what Casey said about the vocal and it getting lost in the music, so it's likely you guys are right.