I'll Call You From Mexico - country

[momof4]

okay, so i had this posted in the lyrics section, but now, i've got music! you may hate it, but at least tell me, ok? thanks!my husband is singin', FYI. and it's not a pro demo or anything, obviously...just a little home recording.http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... 880666I'll Call You from Mexicocopyright 2008 Erin VenableMr. CEO asked me to take his jaguar out to get it lubedIt was just another stupid thing he always had me doBut when he asked me when I thought that I would have it backOh, I...just turned around and laughedI'll call you from MexicoI'll have my feet in the sandAnd an open bottle of Dos Equis in my handI could paint you a picture or mail you a postcardBut you'll hear it all there on the phone(Hahahahaha)I'll call you from MexicoWell, the unemployment line can take the life out of a manadd to that three hyper kids, and dang, it's poor old dadMom & Pop said they'd step in 'till things weren't quite as roughbut when they asked when I'd be back to pick those angels up (I said)I'll call you from MexicoI'll have my feet in the sandAnd an open bottle of Dos Equis in my handI could paint you a picture or mail you a postcardBut you'll hear it all there on the phone(Hahahahaha)I'll call you from Mexico Man, it's so tempting Can't you hear me now Ring ring - ring ringI'm callin' from MexicoI got my feet in the sandAnd an open bottle of Dos Equis in my handI could paint you a picture or mail you a postcardBut you'll hear it all there on the phone(yeah, it's me)I'm callin' from Mexico

[jwebbinspired]

Erin, This is a really good idea. I don't hate it at all. Your hook is a common pun, so I think listeners will have no problem getting your hook. Verses: The lyrics seem good, and just reading them they seem to flow well. The melody seems pretty good too. No major red flags that I can see. Chorus: The lyrics are okay and seems to work fine. But I'm not thrilled with the chorus melody. It doesn't seem solid to me. It also just doesn't seem "big" enough as they say. It doesn't seem to have the right "feel" I guess is what I'm trying to say. I think you've got something here. And you aren't very far away from where you need to be. My major suggestion is to work on the chorus.Andy

[jeep]

Real easy to listen to ...your husband does a great job on vocals...There is always room for improvement on anything but since this is not Pro-Demo I think you did great..Daveoh I gave it 5 stars

[matthoggard]

Its well written and I think the melody is pretty right for the song. I like the mexican music touch. The organ seems distorted in my monitors.Your husband has a good voice and it sounds good recorded.The tempo felt slow to me. Maybe you could speed it up a couple of clicks.Now the bad thing is that Kenney Chesney has pretty much worn out all the island and "mexican" songs. I think this one warrants further refining but the whole feel has been done quite a bit.Good job and glad you finally posted a tune!M~

[ontariolightning]

sounds pretty good for just home recording and the phrasing was really done wellGiven the content of the song I think you did it as well as you could'veIt is an island song and those usually stay within the mellow range and it didCurrently though Nashville does not want any more of these songssince everyone there has them..could luck out thoughI mean it is good enough to get cut by somebodyNot my style of country song but I enjoyed this more than the usual island songsSo I have to say good job!

[motomyrtle]

Jan 26, 2009, 1:20pm, matthoggard wrote:Its well written and I think the melody is pretty right for the song. I like the mexican music touch. The organ seems distorted in my monitors.Your husband has a good voice and it sounds good recorded.The tempo felt slow to me. Maybe you could speed it up a couple of clicks.Now the bad thing is that Kenney Chesney has pretty much worn out all the island and "mexican" songs. I think this one warrants further refining but the whole feel has been done quite a bit.Good job and glad you finally posted a tune!M~what do you mean - if anybody cares - of course we care !I have to agree with most everything Matt said now I know why that one line didn't make sense to me - i didn't know this was a male vocal I would still think that it has potiential in movie or tv avenues - even moreso than the Nashville market - don't you think that they may be more inclined to use your song than use one of the big name songs in their library?Cheryl

[momof4]

thanks, everyone, for the nice words and good advice! the funny thing is, i am SO not a Kenny Chesney fan, and in fact, every time he comes out with a new island or Mexico song, i am the first to groan and b*tch about it, saying "enough! doesn't he realize we're tired of the island crap???!!!" so i guess it is pretty hilarious and ironic that i chime in with my own island/Mexico song! oh, well...it usually takes, what, like 10 years for a novice songwriter to break into the industry? so surely, if i've got any future in this business, maybe America will be ready to head back to the beach by then. lol. glad to have y'all as a support system - it really is invaluable for getting feedback.erin

[heinsite]

hey mom--i like this allot, but i aint commentin' on c/w anymore (but i had to you on this,,,,'cuz you usually say "i can't listen" or "i'm all lyrics.." or something like that...my comments anyway:--hubby does a great job!!--lyrics are just fine--production sucks...so what, you aint done...some of the instruments aint right, but we got the very nice idea just fine, ma'am...--ok, then screw chesney--buffet then!!overall very nice job erin, good structure et al....with better production the bridge will shine and really help, but you know that..ok, this failed (taxi-wise) writer of c/w tunes, over and out...all the best, call you from Mexico...warren

[matthoggard]

Jan 26, 2009, 8:29pm, momof4 wrote:thanks, everyone, for the nice words and good advice! the funny thing is, i am SO not a Kenny Chesney fan, and in fact, every time he comes out with a new island or Mexico song, i am the first to groan and b*tch about it, saying "enough! doesn't he realize we're tired of the island crap???!!!" so i guess it is pretty hilarious and ironic that i chime in with my own island/Mexico song! oh, well...it usually takes, what, like 10 years for a novice songwriter to break into the industry? so surely, if i've got any future in this business, maybe America will be ready to head back to the beach by then. lol. glad to have y'all as a support system - it really is invaluable for getting feedback.erinIt definately is worth keeping in the "catalog". Refine it and have it ready for when someone wants this kind of tune. M~

[cameron]

Hi Erin,I think you have real talent, although I can't really say if I'd only heard this one song of yours that it would be that obvious to me. Nevertheless, I've read some of your other lyrics and I remember your "breakfast" song. I actually think the song's pretty good, just that "pretty good" is like kissing your brother by Nashville standards.Nothing else to add that hasn't already been said, but just wanted to say hubby does a great job of singing, island songs are dead in Nashville right now (as has already been mentioned), steel drums are not a Mexican instrument and that I think you have a knack for lyrical phrasing, so keep writing! Cam