I wrote this for you/ revision

[mewziklvr]

This was my grampa, It is all true and he "was" great. Thanks for the read.Dave "I wrote this for you"V1He rolls over in the mornin', and wipes the sleep out of his eyes, But does not recognize the room, no matter how he tries. There's a picture on the dresser, he thinks he's seen before,It's him holdin' a little boy, outside an old barn door.There's a note there on the wall, that he begins to read.Good mornin' Dad, how are you, I'm your son and my name's Steve.ChorusAnd I wrote this for you, to hang on your wall,So you'd know every day, that you were great after all. V2You own a ranch out north of town, built it with your own 2 hands.That's where you taught me right from wrong, and raised me to be a man.Mama loved you to the soul, until the day she died.She'd say the best man ever born, was the one right by her side.God himself would be proud, to say that he knows you.Cause inside of you's a hero, I wonder, did you see it too?chorusAnd I wrote this for you, to hang on your wall,So you'd know every day, that you were great after all.V3/or bridgeUntil the end of my days, I'll look up to you,And the part of you that's in me, allow it to shine through.I'll stop and see you after work, I do most every night. I wish you could remember this, I pray someday you might.I love you dad, I miss you, and the way you used to beAnd when we stand in heaven, you'll finally remember me.chorusAnd I wrote this for you, to hang on your wall,So you'd know every day, that you were great after all.The old man wipes the tears away, that start rollin' down his cheek,And though he can't remember, it sounds like the life he'd like to lead.

[waltl]

Dave,Excellent. Really powerful lyrics. Wonderful conversational style, excellent choice of details, effective rhymes. A couple points to consider:There seems to be a little bit of confusion. The person "talking" is Steve, the son, and he calls the old man, Dad. However, Steve also talks about Grandma. Shouldn't he refer to the old man's wife as "mom" or "mama"?I am leaning toward "I Wrote This For You" as the title/hook. If that is the case, maybe you should (1) repeat those two lines each time they appear, and (2) repeat the lines at the end of the song.And I wrote this for you, to hang on your wall,So you'd know every day, that you were great after all. Yes, I wrote this for you, Dad, to hang on your wall,So you'd know every day, that you were great after all. Here's a minor editorial suggestion. I think it would help your readers if you indicated where the verses are and where the choruses are:Verse 1ChorusVerse 2Chorus (or Chorus Repeat).Great job, Dave.Walt

[mewziklvr]

Walt,Hmmm, good point. I never thought of that being as how everbody, including my dad and grampa called her grandma. Rural ranch lingo I guess. I'm kinda with you on the title, but was not sure so that's why I asked. Thanks for pointing out that I need to mark the verses, chorus and bridge. I have so much to learn.