My niece is writing her first song

Songwriting, songwriters, etc

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feaker
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My niece is writing her first song

Post by feaker » Wed Jun 03, 2009 2:41 am

I am very excited.Sam stopped over yesterday. I was up on a ladder staining the cedar on my house and looked down to see here waving a piece of paper. She said "uncle Paul I am writing a song" (first day on summer vacation)I have worked with her for the last couple of years on my songs and have begged her for some input. Never happened until today.I don't understand her lyrics, but will not tell her that. I will coach but not interfere.Anyhow she said I have it all in my head so we rushed sond in the studio. I picked up the guitar and she started singing.I included this first one minute trial to show how we figured out the melody. I hit a chord and she found the notes. You can tell it is real rough. You also can tell we have a lot of fun doing this.If you can uderstand her thoughts ( 17 yrs old) or any helpful hints for me to hint direction, I would appreciate it. I am a very poor lyricist. There is only one verse so far. You can listen to our first take at:http://www.taxi.com/feakerSam’s first songMaybe if someone could hear meMaybe if somebody caredMaybe if someone could tell me what to doThen I wouldn’t be so scaredI’m not asking for the (an) answer I’m just looking for suggestions (help) on…How to clear the airHow to clear my headHow to do the right thingHow to make sense of the impossibleThis can’t be happeningI know I’m strong, I know I’m smart (conceited)I know I’ll make it throughBut for once in my lifePlease tell me what to doBreak possibilitiesIf only someone knew, if only that someone was youI really miss you if only I knewYou know I miss you If only I knewThanksPaul

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by suzdoyle » Wed Jun 03, 2009 8:14 pm

One other quick note. My students choose the songs they want to work on for themselves. I'm noticing a trend in many new pop songs of a 4 chord progression repeated over and over through the entire song. Or sometimes even just 1 or 2 chords for the entire song.E.g.Halo (Beyonce ) A Bm F#m D Pocketful of Sunshine Am G Dm FNo One (Alycia Keys) E B C#m A verses + chorus, w/ a few diff chords on bridgeI'm Yours (Jason Mraz) - B F# G#m E (w/ one extra half diminished chord in one spot)Heartless -- mostly a riff and beatsClumsy (Fergie) C7 chord with a riff the entire songIt's fascinating to look at what makes these songs interesting. It's often the beats, or the melody changing to higher places during the chorus or bridge.Sooooo, I'm wondering if this is part of a shift in song structures, or just a blip in the continuum in what we think of as conventional song structure?Might be fun to ask your niece her opinion about some of these tunes. ,Suz

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by feaker » Wed Jun 03, 2009 11:57 pm

Hi SuzGood to hear from you.Through this whole musical (late life) journey it has been just me.It is just so good to have another input. (and yours I am going to save this original lyric sheet with all the hearts and smiley faces on it.Davey (and others) think her voice is more suited to musicals etc. Going to have her try less vibrato. She was doing that from about age seven.So you also teach. Very cool. I did that for 30 years. In fact three of the kids I taught how to play guitar went on to play in a rock band for ten years with me. (taught them at lunch time)I like your methodology. Let them be self creative but in an analytical way. Also to have them very comfortable at your studio. I try to joke around to get realaxed.I have printed your post and will use this as a reference.You have a great ear to pick out those chords. She said she hit a note on her piano at home and sung from there. Her sister Whitney, the piano player, told her it was a "D". Pretty funny.I just kept feeling my way along guessing what her next melody note might be. Great fun.She already has a cakewalk program (never used) similar to mine and a good sound card at her home. I am going to set her up with a mic preamp and a mic to let her experiment at home.I am going to show her the list of artists you mentioned and see if she knows their work. The only artist I heard her talk about was efervescence. I know I slaughtered that but she said a song I was working on instantly reminded her of that?????Kinda silly to post this, but I am just so thrilled about this new direction and its possibilities.Thanks Suz for you very in depth help.Paul

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by davekershaw » Thu Jun 04, 2009 12:47 am

I enjoyed Suz's "blathering"

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by lyricboy » Thu Jun 04, 2009 1:28 am

Paul,I absolutely agree w/SUZ and you about it being wonderful that she's enthused and that SHE is taking steps to engage in the process of making music. COOL.Nudgings on the lyrical end could be that she share some more of the ACTUAL story out loud in the song. It "feels" like she's based this lyric on some kind of story framework...How to make sense of the impossibleThis can’t be happeningIf only someone knew, if only that someone was youI really miss you if only I knewDid the singer lose a parent or a boyfriend? What is the source of her confusion, anxiety? IMO she'll get more zing if she's a little more specific.If my take is correct (only way to know would be to ask her, I suppose ) then I have a suggestion for this (the last) line:You know I miss you If only I knewI think it could be really touching/dramatic at the end inverted, like:If only I knew... You KNOW I miss youLet me know what she thinks of it that way. I'm very curious. Anyway, just my .02.Congrats are in order (for both of you). YAY!p.s. I have a lyric called IS THIS GOOD that I wrote for a young female voice. If you would like to gang up on the music/vox... I think she'd be perfect for it. Drop me a line and let me know if you are interested or not. Thanks.

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by bigbluebarry » Thu Jun 04, 2009 3:03 am

Jun 4, 2009, 2:57am, feaker wrote:I am going to show her the list of artists you mentioned and see if she knows their work. The only artist I heard her talk about was efervescence. I know I slaughtered that but she said a song I was working on instantly reminded her of that?????Hey Paul, The artist she mentioned is Evanescence - http://www.myspace.com/evanescenceI listened to the song and I think she could really pull off the Evanescence sound. I listened to her song, paused it, listened to some Amy Lee (that's the vocalist for Evanescence) and then went back to Sam's song... Paul, I think that's a direction she could really do. She'll need to lose the vibrato though. I know, easier said than done.I can hear the "Broadway" in her voice too, and even some Pop/R&B. I guess what I'm saying is, she has the potential for a range of styles. Me being a rock guy, I'd push her towards Evanescence Regardless, keep encouraging her. I think she's got some talent. I enjoyed listening to her song. Looking forward to hearing where you guys go with it!- Big Blue
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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by suzdoyle » Thu Jun 04, 2009 5:38 am

Hey Paul et. al. Evanescence has some beautiful songs; I particularly like "Hello" and "My Immortal" (great piano parts on those).Dave -- Perhaps I'll expand my repertoire to babbling and dithering . . . and then perhaps pontificating prolifically Lyric boy -- great advice about looking at the story behind the song. I used to accompany voice students for a wonderful voice teacher who had students think about a song using the following ideas. Here's what she had students think about:------------------------------------------SONG INTERPRETATION WORKSHEET by Vicki Righettini, 1988 Name of song Composer/ arranger Style (jazz, rock, classical, country etc.) WHAT is the song about? Does it tell a story? If so, rephrase the plot in your own words. What kind of action is taking place? What is happening? WHO (what character) is singing the song? Is it someone like you or very different from you? In what ways? Are you (the character) singing about yourself or someone else, or both? What is/ are the character(s) of the song like? Describe in as much detail as possible. WHEN is the action taking place? Right now, in the future, or a long time ago? Morning or evening? Broad daylight or the dead of night? Describe. WHERE is the action taking place? Indoors or out? In a vaulted cathedral or a one-room shack? Picture the "set" as vividly as you can and describe in detail. What colors do you see? What is the weather or temperature like? What aromas do you smell? A field of flowers or the smokiness of a nightclub? Let your imagination run wild! Now, imagine your character (WHO) living in the time (WHEN) and place (WHERE) you have created. How does this setting affect the action (WHAT)? HOW is your character feeling the situation? How would you communicate those emotions vocally? You now have the tools to get your song across to your audience. By activating your imagination, you have explored the WHAT, WHO, WHEN, and WHERE of your song. In doing this, you arrived at the emotional content (HOW). Now you can use everything you know about technique (breathing, diction, projection, etc.) bring out those emotions and (hopefully) have more fun in the bargain. Remember: The purpose of any musical technique, instrumental or vocal, is to serve the expression of the music. The challenge of performing is using your interpretive skills so that, by the end of your performance, the audience understands the song as well as you do.-------------------------The more one can be in the story of a song, the more powerful the performance. And Paul, a growing number of voice teachers are offering "Natural Voice" style instruction, focusing on the unique style and interests of the student rather than assuming a goal of formal classical singing for everyone. Rock singers are going to have some similar vocal techniques as classical opera singers, but there will be some major differences, too. Some good resources re: Natural voice instruction are:Claude Stein, The Natural Singer workshopsMedicine Voice - yikes can't recall the name -- Chloe Goodchild???Speech Level Singing/ Mary Beth Felker-- most likely oodles of others . . . Each one is a bit different, but the common focus, in my view, is that the voice is our most vulnerable -- and powerful -- aspect of our personality. Natural singer coaching is about finding your own voice (rather than conforming to someone else's ideal of what a good voice is), and in combining effective technique (good vocal self-care) with emotionality and one's unique personality and style. Most focus on supporting diverse styles of singing.And with that, I'm going to Yodel my way out to my morning walk. Yee-HAH! I'd love to hear how your niece's song unfolds. SuzP.S. One really good voice training book is "The Rock-n-Roll Singer's Survival Manual" by Mark Baxter . . .

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by suzdoyle » Thu Jun 04, 2009 6:51 am

Hey Paul;I just listened to the song and am quite impressed with your niece's voice. Lots of potential there, and a very unique quality. Plus I loved hearing the obvious joy you two were sharing in making the recording. That's what it's all about!It might be helpful to have her listen to female vocal jazz artists for ideas on how to sing with a more straight tone, and also she might benefit from listening to the late Eva Cassidy, who I think has some of the most powerful phrasing and intentionality in how she uses her voice.





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,Suz

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by davekershaw » Thu Jun 04, 2009 10:33 pm

Jun 4, 2009, 8:38am, suzdoyle wrote:babbling and dithering . . . pontificating prolifically So when the cat has got your tongue, there's no need for dismay!Just summon up these words and then you've got a lot to say!

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Re: My niece is writing her first song

Post by k o star » Thu Jun 04, 2009 11:55 pm

Good start! -Kel
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