Do you think this needs a bridge?

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annathomas
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Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by annathomas » Tue Mar 24, 2009 9:56 am

I am working on a new original. You can click on the link here to listen and view lyrics. I have a bridge but have not recorded it yet. I wonder if it even needs one? It may get too long with a bridge. Any thoughts or comments would be greatly appreciated...http://www.broadjam.com/artists/songs.ph....sion INDEX=2979

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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by eokamura » Tue Mar 24, 2009 10:14 am

Hey Anna - Catchy little diddy there. I love the vibe, I think if you pitched it as is the screeners would say to try and differenciate the chorus from the verse more, make it stand out and pop. Don't have any specific suggestions as far as that goes but some thing for you to chew on. Also, some of the phrasing seems a little forced in parts, I think that could be refined. But overall tons of potential. Quirky and happy! Good job! eo. Oh yeah, about the bridge, tough to say obviously without hearing it but i think you fit a bridge in without it being too long.

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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by k o star » Tue Mar 24, 2009 12:52 pm

hey Anna...This is a cool track... a lot of potential... When the Chorus part came in... I felt like it was only the pre-Chorus... leading to a Chorus...I think the Chorus part should just be the pre-Chorus... this song needs a Chorus. Once U have that... it will be kickass! I'm sure...Let the Chorus be even simpler but real catchy, perhaps less words, more hook & U got a hit! This is just MHO... just what I feel... hope it's of some help...Peace,Kel
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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by ciskokidd » Tue Mar 24, 2009 3:07 pm

Hey Anna,First of all the answer is yes! This song absolutely needs a bridge.I think you really need to work through your lyrics in the verses and tighten them up. The prosody is just not there for me yet.Your chorus works for me, but I would just keep the first part of it. For one thing it is much better than the second part and the other reason is you want it to stick in peoples heads, especially with such a catchy melody. You can just tag it with a repeat of the "I feel so right" line a couple of times.There is some great potential for this to be a stellar song, but you are going to have to work those lyrics.The melodies are great and this song makes think Ricki Lee Jones but with modern production.Best of luck and reach for greatness! You're already half way there.Cisko

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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by ideascapes » Tue Mar 24, 2009 5:03 pm

Hi Anna,You've gotten some solid comments already. I think you could use a bridge, mainly to add some contrast. Lyrically, the way the bridge is written right now doesn't totally work for me. Probably because the verses and choruses sound so confident and sound as though you're announcing to a crowd, while in the latter part of the bridge you ask for help from another, previously unnamed character.Vince

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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by annathomas » Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:12 am

AWESOME feedback...I am reworking it this week...

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Re: Do you think this needs a bridge?

Post by annathomas » Thu Mar 26, 2009 6:36 am

I just posted a new message with a link to one with a bridge..

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