song : 3 lb. Sledge (feedback)

[djb]

Hey folks, I'm new around here and I have read Hummingbird's post for newbies about trying to comment on others work before asking for help with your own but for me it seems I would feel more qualified to comment after I get some feedback on mine. I don't have much tech. know how for production as I have my brother to rely on in that department. So forgive me if I haven't been jumping in with my two cents much. One of my more recent songs is called 3lb. Sledge. It's a song about having a "Heavy handed " approach to life. I only have this live take of it with my band since it's new. So I'm not concerned with sound quality yet. I am curious what some folks of your caliber think of the song, the lyrics, the concept and what genre it fits. I have been checking out as much music as I can around here and have been very impressed and sometimes intimidated!! Anyway here's the lyrics: 3 lb. Sledge Just the other day I was out on the job Things were goin' wrong and I was feelin' like a slob About the same time I was actin' like a fool Ruben said " It's simple man you got the wrong tool" he said "You need a trim hammer" And all I had was my 3 pound sledge. chorus: I think a 3 pound sledge oughta get the job done when I want to start somethin' gimme more pounds than one. If things are gettin' delicate it ain't no use. Your gonna wanna trim hammer, anything else is just a lame excuse. So I'm out with my baby late one night , things were gettin' ugly I can see we're gonna fight. I pushed too hard, right up to the edge. That's when she needs a trim hammer but all I got is a 3 pound sledge. chorus: Oh well a 3 lb. sledge gets the job done, for gettin' things started it's second to none. When things are gettin' delicate it don't ring true. Sometimes you need a trim hammer, nothin' else is gonna do. Oh my kids are like a house I gotta work to get em built. Without the right equipment my house is at a tilt. Sometimes it feels like we're slippin' off the ledge. Sometimes they need a trim hammer, but all God gave me was this 3 pound sledge! chorus: My 3 lb. sledge gets the job done. I wanna beat somethin' gimme more pounds than one. It comes to bein' delicate it ain't no use. You need a trim hammer, anything else is just a lame excuse! Some words in the chorus may be different in the recording but this is the latest write of the words. So maybe you can listen in and reply with your thoughts. This is my link www.taxi.com/dberdoulay and play 3lb. sledge. If nothing else you got to give me credit for typing all this with one finger! Thanks alot. Dave Berdoulay

[billg]

hey Dave, it's gonna be pretty hard to comment . . . I had to really crank the speakers to hear your song. from what i could tell it sounds pretty good, liked the slide playing. I never comment too much on lyrics, just too subjective. Seems like it gets harder and harder these days to get around the actual production when looking for a song critique . . . i think you at least need to see if you can boost your volume a little bit-

[djb]

Bill Thanks for trying. I seem to have plenty of volume here. Not sure if there's a problem on this end. Maybe I should see If the next person has the same trouble?? Dave

[jwebbinspired]

Dave, It came across real quiet on my speakers too. It sounds me to me like a live recording and not a studio recording, just my observation. The song is pretty fun/rowdy sounding. It sounds like a 50's-60's groove with some blues influence. Instruments are all played well, and the vocals sounds good for this type of song. I think the main thing to think about is production if you are looking to market this song as is.Andy

[djb]

Andy, Thanks for listening. This is definately ROUGH! I would definately re- record it for any other use. As a matter of fact it is live and the first time we played it. As I said in my intro to this thread I was only looking for some takes on the song as it stands. I sure apreciate you checking it out and take from your comments it's a reasonably good start. for an idea of my finished production sound check out "Without A Net" on the same link. Thanks so much for taking the time to respond! Dave P.S. I don't know what's up with the volume I loaded it the same as the others and it plays loud on my end . any advice??