Dark Days take 2

[billg]

Well here's yet another song I can add to the ever growing folder I call "my deep album cuts".It's an attempt at a comment on the times and that we all need to do a little something positive (whatever that might be) and just hang in & things will play out & get better.I wanted it to have a familiar "timeless" old school feel in an attempt to create an immediate warm fuzzy vibe to contrast with the not so warm fuzzy lyrics in the verses.Shooting for timeless, but probably just dated.(hey, that should probably be the title of my next cd It's called Dark Days. timeless or dated?http://www.billgaunce.com/song/107

[ragani]

Hey Bill,Oooo, I had to listen before heading back to my studio-- you already know I'm a great fan of your Bob Dylan- style vocals! This is not really my genre of expertise, so I couldn't say if it was classic/timeless or dated, but I liked it! I was hoping to hear it go even a little higher for the chorus, but the feel certainly had a groove that I enjoyed. I especially liked where you dropped out some of the instruments later in the song. Nice. Raags

[jonathanm]

Hey, Bill. Love the feel and the vox. Really good stuff.The chorus felt to me a bit like a pre-chorus, which I thought would lead to something big landing on the 1 chord. As it is, it doesn't seem to stand out enough or have the energy lift expected in a chorus.Love the "head down, collar up..." imagery. One thing to consider is that the words seem to not really move anywhere, that is, they're all really great images of roughly the same picture. One possible solution: On the final verse, instead of repeating the first verse, you may want to draw it really close and personal by making that verse about "what went wrong between us" (the singer and his woman) and the dark days he's now living as a result; similar to the final verse of "Big Yellow Taxi" (Joni Mitchell)As far as timeless or dated, I think this really could be timeless (and current for that matter). John Mayer had a hit with a similar theme in "Waiting On The World To Change". Plenty o' room for more.Good job, man.

[kitz]

Bill,Right on!! Guitar parts sound great. I think the organ could really move on this one. You've got it in the background but you might try using it for fills. I could never play the part but that's kind of what I hear. Just a thought. Also - the drums are so - let's see - maybe constant is the word. I'd love to hear the drums vary up their dynamics in some spots. You know real soft and sensitive and then kick back in. Cool tune!!! Vocals sound great and lyrics - I'm not sure about the "deep blue tube" but I'm thinking it's the tele showing us pictures of people in breadlines. That's what I got. I think a screener would say "you need a little brightness" but you don't tell us how we might resolve the situation. I don't know - I got the screener blues lately so I thought I'd throw that out there.I think you got a good thing here and some window dressing will kick it up a notch or 2.Not Dated - especially this topic.All the Best,Kitz

[geo]

Bill... like this a lot... reminds me of "Rain on the Scarecrow"... not the song so much but the album... little John Cougar... couple of points...The guitar solo didn't grab me... didn't seem to go anywhere.... how about breaking down for the solo, instead of after?At the end when you repeat the chorus I would add the hook "In these dark, dark days" before repeating...Great lyrics and production as always!!Peace, Geo

[geo]

P.S. Always judged bands by their album cuts!!

[billg]

Thanks for the feedback folks. Raags, thanks, should have started in a lower key probably to have sung the chorus higher . . . jonathanm, I know it's sorta strange but the way I was hearing it is that there really isn't a chorus but a pre-chorus that leads to a hook (or what is supposed to be a "the hook") which is the breakdown "light another candle" line. I really wanted a third verse but just couldn't come up with anything I liked. I don't think I want to turn it into a relationship song. I need to come up with another verse that leaves things hanging but has clearer meaning I think. I'm just trying to say that things can turn "good" just as easily and quickly as things turned "bad" and if we do positive things & hang in, eventually it will turn back around. If I can get a clever third verse I think the others will make more sense.kitz, you're correct about the drums & the organ. If I had better drum tools (or better knowledge on how to use what I have) I whould have added more dynamics, I tried with those little crush rolls. And I'm a crummy organ player, all I can do is go for some texture. Yeah, I know that this song will never fit a listing.Geo, the guitar solo is a place holder until I get my friend over to play slide on it. Of course, I've said that about some other parts & they still haven't been straightened out!

[davekershaw]

Hey Bill, this sounds just like Elvis!In fact it sounds more like Elvis than Elvis!Maybe name that album "Bill Sings Elvis"Heck No! "Bill Outsings Elvis"Did I tell you it sounds like Elvis?Hey really Bill. This is a great track.Super production, and love the smooth guitar.I can imagine Rod Stewart singing this.Conjures up Don Henley too. Very much his style of lyric and message.Excellent work!Dave.

[heinsite]

hi billy--i immediately thought of Mayer--then i read it by jonathan--then i thought, "ok, where's the chorus" after that prechorus...then read that by jonathan--but i don't give a damn, i still like it. no production comments from this production genius...sounds fine to me...and i hope Don Henley sings it, NOT stewart, though i don't mind him, but that would be my preference--..and there's elvis AGAIN davie--geeze--no comment...just don't think so...all the best,whi still think it a quality piece of music

[wta]

You hit Mayer in my head as well... Nice piece man. Ya this has a blues overtone but it says singer/songwriter to me man. My only issue would be that the tune sound very similar throughout, I'd like there to be a jump to get to that chorus. Maybe volume increase could be enough? More dynamics? Love this feel man.