Angel at the Grave - Does this need a bridge?

[cameron]

Hi gang,OK, every now and then I have to do something just for me, so here's one that probably has no commercial potential... but what the hell. Dunno... maybe it would work for someone like Tom Waits.Basically, this song relates to a personal experience that I had the first time I visited the grave of someone who had been very, very close to me. I had always thought cemeteries were a waste of real estate, until then, when I realized that that's the one place we can go to feel a connection with the deceased. I guess anyone who has visited the grave of someone they've been very close to can relate to that feeling.Anyway, here's my naked work tape, warts and all. The lyrics have some minor changes from what I've sung, and the updates are included below. I've also written a bridge-- and included the lyrics below-- but the bridge is not on the recording. Adding the bridge and a final chorus will add about 1:15 to the song. Although that will make it only about 3:45 total, maybe it works better as a short piece? I just wonder if the bridge is needed for the story to make sense... or maybe it's OK to leave it vague with a bit of mystery?Thanks for the listen.Camhttp://www.taximusic.com/song.php?song_id=1768 ... =trueAngel at the GraveI didn't want to make the trip you knowthere's nothing left for me in IdahoTraveling St. Joe River Road just stirs up old regretsbut I came to town pay you my respectsAnd now I know, yes I knowthere was an angel at the grave who told me sothough I couldn't see her through the tearsTo me her presence there was clearand she told me everything I need to knowand now I know, yes I knowthat's the reasonthat's the reasonA Jesus statue, a plastic flower or twoWe cut the weeds away, untidy wouldn't doI'd always thought these places such a waste of spaceBut then I read the name and I put it to the faceAnd now I know, yes I knowthere was an angel at the grave who told me sothough I couldn't see her through the tearsto me her presence there was clearand she told me everything I had to knowand now I know, yes I knowand that's the reason Bridge:Angel make me strong so she won't see me cryingCould it be something you said?I've come to know this place is for the livingNot for the deadAnd now I know, I knowthere was an angel at the grave who told me so though I couldn't see her through the tearsat that moment it was clearand she told me everything I had to knowand now I know, I knowthat's the reason

[deantaylor]

Cam,I suggest that all members who use 'taximusic' links, also put a direct link to their taximusic site, then it gives reviewers 2 options for how to access the mp3. I can rarely access these direct links. Can't access this one.But I like your lyric. I didn't pour over it and disect it, but from a quick readthru, I liked the bridge. I think it makes a good point and makes it well. If it works musically, leave it in there.Dean

[deantaylor]

OK, I located your webpage link on my own. lolDude, I really like this vocal!!!!!!!! Record this one yourself!!!! Good song, too.Yes, I vote to put the bridge in there.Dean

[Casey H]

Nice song. Feels (in a very good way) like an Elton John ballad musically... Maybe a male Sara M... I would take it that direction (singer-songwriter), not country, though I don't know you were thinking country here... Very pretty and emotional, expresses the sadness very well You definitely need a bridge because there really isn't a stand out chorus. The "angel at the grave" line is more subtlety built in more like part of a verse. It's screaming for the change-up.Best! Casey

[cameron]

Thanks Dean... Man this singing stuff's a struggle for me. As I get older though I don't give a damn and just go for it anyway. All I can do is keep working to get better at it. Kind of like songwriting, come to think of it.Casey, thanks. Funny you should mention Elton John as I was thinking it reminded me of "Talking Old Soldiers" off the Tumbleweed Connection album. EJ was a big musical influence so I guess that comes through. I guess I'll put the bridge in and re-record it. I'm afraid 3:45 of the song might get a bit monotonous so I might have to do something else to shorten it elsewhere.Thanks again!Cameron

[linziellen]

This is just beautiful Cam, I'd love to hear the song again with a bridge, I wanted to hear the chorus again!This has an Elton meets Johnny Cash feel to it. Wonderful work.

[matthoggard]

Cam,Very poignant idea here. Made me think of an old friend who died when we were young.I see an adult contemporary thing here.I am a little lost in the chorus. I can imagine what the angel told you but I think with your lyrical skills you could really tell the story clearer.And what is the "reason"? Maybe I missed something??? I listened 3 times.Also, I like the 3rd line of the 2nd verse the way you have it written instead of what you say about "contempt". The lines in the bridge are beautiful. I think you could repeat your hook line in the chorus and really hammer it home.I too heard Elton John.Beautiful piano work. I may have to pay you play a track or two on one of my songs. M~

[cameron]

Linzi... Thanks so much. OK, I'm going to add the bridge.Matt - You hit the nail on the head. I wondered if more people might ask that question. I have to bare my soul here a bit to find the answer, but what I'm trying to convey in the song is that after being sort of ambivalent about making the trip to the cemetery, one glimpse at the name on the headstone and I broke down and cried like a baby, and I felt a real connection with the deceased in some way I can't quite explain. When I thought about it, I realized the reason we have cemeteries. So what I'm trying to say is that I now understand that the reason we have them. They're really for the living, not for the dead, but I tried to convey that in an impressionistic way, probably because I don't know how to say it more directly in any sort of way that might be artful. I wondered if I was clear enough, and finally decided that being a bit indirect in the lyrics would be OK for a singer/songwriter genre (but definitely not for country). I'm thinking about someone like Sarah McLachlan, for example, whose lyrics at times are quite impressionistic. Whether its brilliant art or bad writing is all in the eye of the beholder. I'm not even sure myself, which to me means the latter is probably closer to the truth.Regarding the 2nd verse, yeah, I felt that "contempt" was too strong a word.Thanks for listening y'all!Cameron

[heinsite]

hi cam--on the site thing, i had the opposite this time--came right up, usually have to wait a long LONG friggin' time.ok, i don't give a damn what genre this is--waits might work, many would. not sure about c/w as it doesn't have a true catchy BS chorus, nor the instrumentation. . .actually i hear it as all verse. and i don't give a damn...but damn cam, there is something about that voice of yours, and the way you pen a tune that is so very special to me, and i know to others as well. i'll leave the damned technical critique crap aside for now. (the lyrics need some work, so what?) i just love this tune, your feel, the UNIDENTIFIABLE yet unmistaken magic that even your rough tunes have my friend.that's it, my opinion AND a free crappy non-critique, but i'm not touchin' this tune right now for anything. it moved me. period. sometimes that's just plain damned enough man...thank you for posting it...all the best,warren

[wignelson]

Very nice work, Cam. I have a suggestion, but you may not want to hear it. Anyway, here goes:Before you re-record it with a bridge think of this. Matt mentioned that the thought wasn't quite finished what the angels told you. I wanted to hear that, too. I wanted to hear some line about a question. Like you asked yourself why. Why oh why did this person have to die? And then the answer from the angels, and Then the line about how the angels told you so. Get it? Then each verse ends with a hook and no need for a bridge.I didn't think that the bridge was very strong. Forgive me for saying so.I am a big believer in making art for the sake of art and not falling into the traditionally accepted formula for writing a song.If we all did that, songs would become VERY predictable and frankly, boring.If someone tells you you have to have a bridge, I would question their knowledge of creativity. Sorry for telling it like it is, but I can't do it any other way. I wouldn't even bother if it wasn't such a good song. Nice atmosphere in this one. I was pulling for the guy to get past his loss.Wig