New song, I need your feedback please!

[putter232000]

Hi Gang!Just finished up another Country song...kind of a shag/two step/beach song about summer love. I welcome your comments!http://broadjam.com/player/player.php?p ... hanks,Andy(hopefully the link works! if not, check below)

[cameron]

Hi Andy,To me this song is really very good in just about every respect, except one, but to me it's a biggie; the "She's My Baby" theme seems not strong enough of an idea to carry the whole song. Hopefully, I'm just missing the point of the summer love thing and everyone will jump in here and slam me, but that's what stands out to me. Hey, I could be wrong. Jackson Browne did OK with "She must be somebody's baby, she's so fine", which was hardly an earth-shattering statement. I like the "mango moon" line (at least that's what I thought I heard).The song has a really nice laid back island feel to it.You've done a very nice job on the demo. Where did you record it? Cam

[matthoggard]

Very impressive!!You have a great contemporary/mainstream sound here. Nice demo. I really like the melody/harmony structure. I sang along and its very easy to sing and flow with.The only thing that stuck out to me was the "now shes wearing my ring" line. It didnt seem to have enough story leading up to it. Now I was able to catch your drift but we all know how country songwriting is. We practically have to spell out every line and hold the listeners hand through the song.That said, I am stoked by your music compostion and melody and harmonies. What a great feel and sound.You've got a great one here!M~

[Casey H]

Nicely performed song! Can you post the lyrics? The song info bjam link brought up nothing.I like the music and what I can tell of the lyrics, each to themselves. My biggest concern would be how the type of lyrics fit a country song and a country pitch in today's market. I'm not a country music guy so my knowledge of the market is very limited. But the lyrics feel more like a 60's pop song than a country song. "She's My Baby" isn't the type of title or hook line that's going to get any Nashville folks very excited. You want to reel them in with something unique and interesting and I think it's obvious that this is very much a cliche, overused phrase. So I could see these words in a 60's replacement track more than a country song.As I mentioned, I am not country music savvy, so this is my gut reaction. I'd get a pro-critique and see what kind of feedback you get.JMHOHTH Casey

[putter232000]

Thanks for your replies so far! I wanted that retro, beachy, two-step/shag kind of song, like Brooks and Dunn meet Kenny Chesney under the boardwalk at Jimmy Buffet's place. NOT meant to be a heavy weight song, just a fun, toe tapping song with a hook that takes hold and does not let go! Just an innocent kind of song... is this about teenage love, or mature? Is the guy going steady, or now engaged? It doesn't matter. It's about how it makes you feel.If you check my page here at Taxi, or at broadjam, the lyrics are posted, along with my other music. Andy

[Casey H]

Oct 12, 2008, 8:14am, putter232000 wrote:Thanks for your replies so far! I wanted that retro, beachy, two-step/shag kind of song, like Brooks and Dunn meet Kenny Chesney under the boardwalk at Jimmy Buffet's place. NOT meant to be a heavy weight song, just a fun, toe tapping song with a hook that takes hold and does not let go! Just an innocent kind of song... is this about teenage love, or mature? Is the guy going steady, or now engaged? It doesn't matter. It's about how it makes you feel.If you check my page here at Taxi, or at broadjam, the lyrics are posted, along with my other music. AndyThe lyrics don't seem to come up on bjam. Can you post a link that you know brings them up?As with any song, what matters is your goal with it and all reviews must be in that context. If you want to pitch for a Nashville single, for example, that's different than film/TV, just for fun, your own CD, etc. And this rock-guy from the New Yawk may not be the best to go by...Best, Casey

[putter232000]

Casey, here is the link to the song (and lyrics)on broadjam. http://broadjam.com/artists/songs.php?a ... 44A4C9BA4C I hope it works! It is being pitched in Nashville, so we will wait and see!Thanks,Andy Taylor

[wta]

Wow! Had me to the end with that one mate. I'm not a country guy but the instrument production quality is top shelf. Even through laptop speakers she rang true. Love the vocals on this too, a few words were abit quiet though. My only thought was I felt the ending was four bars too long and the fade out to was a bit long but that's just my ears. Over all this is a really great song in my books... '-) wta

[wignelson]

Andy, this is a good start to a song. One question about the lyrics. ""Her laughter brightens the night sky . . . it's time that I let her know."Let her know what? You follow that with "She's my baby." You can't mean let her know that she's my baby, right? I mean, she's already wearing your ring.Instruments and vocals are top notch. Nice demo.

[putter232000]

hey wig:Thanks for your comments. It is meant to be a retro throwback to a more innocent time when I may feel "she's my baby" but I haven't let her know it. In V2, NOW she is wearing my ring..under the mango moon she took it and is wearing it, and NOW is really is my baby. It is mostly inference. Andy