Modernize this one?

[Casey H]

Hi allI've been working on new material but I am also revisiting old stuff that has potential. This was a collab I did with an old tonos.com friend named Ted Tomiuk. I did the lyrics, he did the music as well as performed it. Ted's quite a guitar player! Thank you Ted... for everything!This production isn't modern and isn't film/TV ready. There are only two verses and a lot of (very cool!) psychedelic guitar. My thought would be to add another verse or a bridge and get it produced as more current sounding.So... What do you think of a modern rock remake of this one?Wonder Woman(c) 2003 Words by Charles P. Hurowitz, Music by Ted Tomiuk http://www.broadjam.com/transmit/transm ... yhgbndsq=1(Verse 1) Since he left you on your own Your super powers sure have grown Every time I tell you what I feel Then you raise your invisible shield (Chorus) Wonder woman don’t you know me by now You don’t need that gold lasso anyhow Take the tiara from your hair And I’ll climb up your bedroom stairs (Verse 2) With magic bracelets you deflect the pain I wonder woman why I need to explain Super heroes lead such lonely lives They save the world and sleep alone every night instrumental chorus Thanks, Casey

[diogenes]

I think it could definitely work with a sort of Fuel/Daughtry production vibe. Especially vocally, I think a singer along those lines could really take this to the next level. In my opinion I think the arrangement is solid, maybe trim up that last guitar solo, and beef up the last chorus.

[mixopenta]

I second to what diogenes says.IMHO the basic sound of both guitars and vocals are on par for what could be considered modern today. The lyrics are especially modern (or timeless perhaps). Apart from beefing up the last chorus and tidying up the ending solo, all the song really need is a better recording and more focused performance. ) I don't think that the basic approach of arrangement needs to be altered in any way.A third verse would of course also be possible, and a suggestion in such case would be to take it down (e.g. vocal accompanied only by a set of plucking guitars a la "Enter Sandman" intro), the first one, or two lines - as to create a sort of a breakdown (voila=the bridge) without losing too much of the basic, psychedelic feel.I think you should go for it, the song has a lot of potential!

[panicboy]

Stream of consciousness as I'm listening.I'd throw out the real drums during the verses and opt for a synthetic, distorted drum loop. The slapback on the vocal is a little on the heavy side, as is the ducking/compression. I'd toss out the acoustic stuff for more chunka-chunk geetar. And this may sound strange, but play-up the Boston/Mutt-esque quality of those harmonies on the choruses, more voices. And less meedly-meedly guitar. Speed it up a bit, perhaps?I'm not sure this needs any more writing at all. It feels like a complete song to me.

[Casey H]

Thanks diogenes, u peters, and panicBoy... Appreciate the listen and feedback!!I'm drawn to working on this one because the lyrics are closer to universal than many others I've written. BTW, never underestimate the value of forums like this. The inspiration for the song came from a friend I met on the tonos message board. She was a single mom, doing it all on her own so somehow I started calling her Wonder Woman. And I met Ted, who wrote the music, the same way.More listens and opinions welcome, especially style suggestions... Casey

[anne]

Hi Casey - I have to listen to it more but my "streaming" thoughts as I listened initially.Opening - cool drum sound, but it gets to be too much during the verse and chorus. Change it up with something else during those parts - a different sound altogether like someone said would work.Lyrics - definitely not what I expected from the music - I wouldn't change anything lyricallyTempo - make it a tiny little bit faster? Maybe?Vocals - I like the vocals, and especially the harmoniesYep, its more of an opinion than any real help, but its my first reaction.