"TELL ME WHY"

[smaltonian]

So here's the story....I'm basically a SINGER/SONGWRITER who writes in several styles & I recently wrote a country ballad.... I Live in L.A. & for the life of me could not find a "country" music producer locally....I wasn't even even close to having finances for Nashville....I finally just moved forward myself & brought in different players locally & had them stick to the original feeling of the tune....... Let me know your thoughts on the song, vocals & overall production........All feedback is greatly appreciated. Steve Altonian http://www.soundclick.com/stevealtonianTELL ME WHYNever been the kind to say what’s on my mindWhat I want to tell you is how I feelI get so afraid you might be my worst mistakeI toss and turn in bed at night can we get it right(CHORUS): TELL ME WHY does it seem It always has to come down to you and me I try to sing a different song But it don’t last too long TELL ME WHY is it so I can’t seem to ever let you go My mind tells me to walk away But my heart says stay Won’t you TELL ME WHY Won’t you TELL ME WHYYou’re no good for me, I’m no good for youStill we stay together even thoughSometimes I get confused why we do the things we doCaught in this web of love that’s all tangled up(CHORUS): TELL ME WHY does it seem It always has to come down to you and me I try to sing a different song But it don’t last too long TELL ME WHY is it so I can’t seem to ever let you go My mind tells me to walk away But my heart says stay Won’t you TELL ME WHY Won’t you TELL ME WHY Won’t you TELL ME WHY Won’t you TELL ME WHY(c) 2006 Steve Altonian

[smaltonian]

Anybody?

[rick]

I don't know if you are new to these boards but I am.I have been hanging out here for about a month and a half.I have yet to post any of my material.I have been getting to know people and listening to others peoples music and responding to it.If you just show up with a song you're not gonna get many takers.You gotta want to be part of the community.But I'll cut you some slack and tell you what I think.You have a really good melody on this song.The verse and the chorus work well together.The lyric is well written and is a good story.I think it's well thought out and co-hesive.I'm not sure how you are going to pitch this song as a single,tv,or in a movie,but no matter the fact the song is approaching 5 minutes is the kiss of death in my opinion.Also just my opinion but the title TELL ME WHY really doesn't reach out and grab people as it's way overused.Good luck

[elser]

Hey Steve, don't take it personally that no one has responded, this kind of stuff usually goes on in the Peer to Peer section, move it over there if you havn't already and somebody'll tell you what they think. I liked the song, I liked your voice, the sound quality is good, but I didn't like the arrangement, it felt like it was really dragging for the first verse and chorus, I thought the cross stick drum part should have been going on in the first verse and then build from there, later on bring in the big drum fills, strings, heavy guitars and all the fixin's...ya know.... see if anybody else says similar things and you might find a direction that is more accessible to your listeners. Just talkin', elser

[johnhampt]

I am working on writing mostly country now so hopefully my opinion is valid somewhat. I liked the chorus. It was catchy and moving. It needs harmonies though. The verses dragged. It seemed like a lot of time was spent without saying very much. Maybe you could even cut the verses in half. It's your chorus that's the hook here and I felt as though I kept waiting for it. I think your production was decent, voice was good ( faked twang was as bit obvious at times ) and your close. Keep it up...

[diogenes]

I am constantly blown away by the production quality I continue to hear from Taxi. Yours is no exception. Great performances. As to how "country" the song is I really cant say as I don't listen to much country, but you sold me. I wish I could come up with something more meaty to say, but I honestly don't listen to music the way that many of the members do (this is not a slam to members, but a mention of my own shortcomings!). And by that I mean I have yet to develop the analytical approach to listening with regards to structure, lyrics, chord changes ect. I either like it or I don't. I liked your song. Good luck

[smaltonian]

Quote:I am constantly blown away by the production quality I continue to hear from Taxi. Yours is no exception. Great performances. As to how "country" the song is I really cant say as I don't listen to much country, but you sold me. I wish I could come up with something more meaty to say, but I honestly don't listen to music the way that many of the members do (this is not a slam to members, but a mention of my own shortcomings!). And by that I mean I have yet to develop the analytical approach to listening with regards to structure, lyrics, chord changes ect. I either like it or I don't. I liked your song. Good luckDIOGENESThanks for the listen........and yeah you either like it or you don't....I"M GLAD YOU LIKE IT......Peace

[hummingbird]

As I said on another board, I think the music is great, but I feel the lyrics need work. I think they could be tighter & more cohesive. I'm not sure if they would be considered country. There's another thread with a big discussion of what is country that is a very interesting read....http://taxi.proboards27.com/index.cgi?a ... 16&page=3H.

[smaltonian]

VikkiThe more I hear from the "pure" country writers I have to concur with everyone on the country aspect...... it's probably more a POP/ROCK BALLAD than a COUNTRY BALLAD...Especially lyrically....Believe me......I left it vague on purpose......It'll find its target audience. Actually it already has....for every re-write I've heard I hear many many more "don't change a thing" commentsThe overwhelming feedback is that those who hate country love the tune....Interesting dilemma...And remember I have absolutely no intention of pitching the tune to other artists....I'm cutting it...This is Steve....this is what I do...how I phrase.....how I singThanks for your input...Steve Altonian http://www.soundclick.com/stevealtonian

[opensky]

I think this song has "hit" written all over it, whether it's being done by another artistor by you. I think the production quality, musicianship and vocals are good enough forbroadcasting quality. Keep up the great work.